DD heard listening to explicit music

[Anonymous]

It’s not any worse than the music those of us who came of age in the late 90s/early 00s were listening to. I was smart enough to hide it though.

[Anonymous]

I don't censor music. Yes, I think you're going too far by trying to do so.

[Anonymous]

Still waiting to hear what OP listened to at age 14!

[Anonymous]

Since way before teenage years I've talked about how artists and performers can do and say things in a song or poem or painting or whatever that would not be acceptable to say or do in real life. No censorship unless around younger kids ("let's save that for after car pool") or grandparents.

[Anonymous]

I don't censor music my 12 and 13 yo listen to but we talk about what is appropriate (for example, they are never to sing certain words, even if it's in a song, etc) but it feels like closing battle to censor it completely.

[Anonymous]

Mick visibly rolls his eyes performing on the Ed Sullivan show when he has to self-censor "Let's spend the night together" to "Lets spend some time together":



PLAY VIDEO ▶

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Still waiting to hear what OP listened to at age 14!

Eminem, lol!

[Anonymous]

My daughter listens to the same stuff but uses headphones. I let her know I don’t like it but understand the allure. I used to love Darling Nikki and other explicit music when I was her age. She’ll mature and stop.

[Anonymous]

Even though I agree with you, it's a fruitless battle in the digital age. Kids can and will access explicit media, both music and movies, whether you like it or not. It's too pervasive and easy to access. If you restrict it, they'll listen to or watch it on their friends' devices.

I just make sure to tell my kids that the message and content that they're listening doesn't align with the values we've instilled and expect of them, and that entertainment is not an instruction manual for life. And I force them to acknowledge the messages conveyed in what they're blasting in their ears. They whine and complain, "It's just music! It's not a big deal!" but I know my saying those things burrows it's way into the back of their minds and hopefully creates the separation I'm aiming for between what they're listening to and watching and how they should act and behave in the world.

It's tough, OP. But that's the reality of parenting in this digital age. We have very little control.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a DD the same age and I don’t make an issue over music, generally.

That aside, no clue what a “sexy red” is lol

Here's your introduction to Sexxy Red, Gen-Z's hottest idol:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DD the same age and I don’t make an issue over music, generally.

That aside, no clue what a “sexy red” is lol

Here's your introduction to Sexxy Red, Gen-Z's hottest idol:

Lil Kim was doing the same thing 20 years ago. Yes, I knew all the words.

[Anonymous]

We listened to Little Red Corvette but we thought it was about a car.

[Anonymous]

I struggle with the same thing with our 14 yo DS.

DH talks to him about the misogyny in a lot of music. How there's nothing wrong to listening to music that has explicit language. But listening to music that glorifies violence or belittles/objectifies women is not something we really want to support. But we don't outright ban any music.

So far, it's worked. DH will occasionally pop into DS' phone (including spotify) to see what they are listening to, and while some artists push the envelope, nothing overtly misogynic.

[Anonymous]

I tend to be conservative, but at 14, I probably wouldn’t try and censor music. She’ll inevitably hear it other places. Presumably she knows you don’t want her adopting vocabulary or attitudes from these songs, but if she doesn’t I’d have a brief discussion on that. I think it’s perfectly reasonable for you to say that you don’t want to listen to that music so she can listen to it in her room or with earphones (might want to discuss potential hearing loss from using earphones at a loud volume). If there’s something particularly egregious and not just generally offensive, I might ban a particular song, but I think trying to censor on a large scale might be counterproductive.

Meanwhile, expose her to a wide variety of music. While it probably won’t replace this music, it may expand her preferences. You might even introduce her to Weird Al’s parodies, but then let her decide if she prefers his versions or the originals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a DD the same age and I don’t make an issue over music, generally.

That aside, no clue what a “sexy red” is lol

Here's your introduction to Sexxy Red, Gen-Z's hottest idol:

Lil Kim was doing the same thing 20 years ago. Yes, I knew all the words.

I'm going to set aside any debate about any differences in the sophistication of the metaphors and innuendo between Kim and Sexxy Red.

But what spooks and rubs most people the wrong way about Sexxy Red is her appeal to elementary age children. They know her songs and her songs are definitely not elementary appropriate.

Lil' Kim appealed to middle and high schoolers.