My DS wants to be a musician. WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Most people would be thrilled to have found, or their kid's to find a passion and talent by the age of 15. Support him. But he must graduate high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

Being able to get into college isn’t the same thing as going to college. Having the high school grades to get in means he can go later. Not doing his homework and failing (or getting exceptionally low grades in) classes in high school, not so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

An educated musician is a better musician. Plus, he'll almost certainly will need conservatory studies at some point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

An educated musician is a better musician. Plus, he'll almost certainly will need conservatory studies at some point.

lol what?! Again, unless he’s going into jazz or classical, conservatories aren’t at all a thing.

To the PP who asked which rock musicians don’t have intense musical training: the ones who do are the exception.

Only one member of Foo Fighters has intense musical training and Dave Grohl always sorta pokes fun at him when they do band intros. It’s their keyboardist Rami. Dave says “oh yeah Rami knows music theory and all that fancy s***.”

If this kid wants to play rock, basic chord theory and pentatonic scales help, but he can get that with some lessons or online during high school.

Music school for college is 100% unnecessary and again — conservatories teach classical and maybe jazz. No other genres that I’m aware of and certainly not rock.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

Because he will need intense musical training to get anywhere. The people he'll be competing against will have studied music, with private lessons, since early childhood.

Unless he’s going into jazz or classical, this is completely wrong.

Most successful rock musicians have had little or no formal musical training. Virtually none went to music school.

- Lifelong musician who has played classical and, for the last 20 years, rock in gigging cover and original bands

Which ones? I am thinking Ed Sheeran and Adam Levine and Alicia Keys etc, started early and intensely.

Ed Sheeran dropped out of music school his first year, at age 18 to go on tour and never returned.


Adam Levine has no intense musical training that I can find. He formed his first band when he was 15. They got a record deal. He did less than one semester of college and dropped out.

Alicia Keys is the only person in your list who received intense musical training. She dropped out of Columbia.

[Anonymous]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annie_Lennox

“In the 1970s, Lennox won a place at the Royal Academy of Music in London, where she studied the flute, piano and harpsichord for three years. She lived on a student grant and worked at part-time jobs for extra money. Lennox was unhappy and doubted her own talent when compared to her student contemporaries[18] while at the Royal Academy and deliberated on what other direction she could take.[19]

Lennox's flute teacher's final report stated: "Ann has not always been sure of where to direct her efforts, though lately she has been more committed. She is very, very able, however." Two years later, Lennox reported to the academy: "I have had to work as a waitress, barmaid, and shop assistant to keep me when not in musical work." She also played and sang with a few bands, such as Windsong, during the period of her course. In 2006, the academy made her an honorary Fellow.[20] Lennox also was made a Fellow of the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama that year.[21]”

[Anonymous]

Send him to Belmont in Nashville for college to learn about the industry. He might need to work in music but not necessarily be a perfomer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annie_Lennox

“In the 1970s, Lennox won a place at the Royal Academy of Music in London, where she studied the flute, piano and harpsichord for three years. She lived on a student grant and worked at part-time jobs for extra money. Lennox was unhappy and doubted her own talent when compared to her student contemporaries[18] while at the Royal Academy and deliberated on what other direction she could take.[19]

Lennox's flute teacher's final report stated: "Ann has not always been sure of where to direct her efforts, though lately she has been more committed. She is very, very able, however." Two years later, Lennox reported to the academy: "I have had to work as a waitress, barmaid, and shop assistant to keep me when not in musical work." She also played and sang with a few bands, such as Windsong, during the period of her course. In 2006, the academy made her an honorary Fellow.[20] Lennox also was made a Fellow of the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama that year.[21]”

Flute is very different. It’s traditionally a classical instrument.

Throughout this thread, I’ve tried to clearly differentiate between jazz/classical and rock.

You can’t possibly tell me that intense musical training, post-secondary music school, and conservatories are necessary for becoming a working rock musician.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Send him to Belmont in Nashville for college to learn about the industry. He might need to work in music but not necessarily be a perfomer.

Or let him go to open mics and shows and meet other musicians his age. Let him join a band and play shows.

That’s how you make it in rock. I’m assuming that’s what he wants since OP said he plays guitar.

Make him graduate high school, but ultimately it’s about getting into the local music scene and joining/forming a band.

[Anonymous]

You can wholeheartedly encourage his chosen profession, but: (a) he is still a child, and doing well in school is his responsibility, so enforce that and (b) you have to have very candid conversations, plural, about the reality of being a working musician. I also have an artist child, who no matter what will certainly end up in the arts, and we talk frequently about job prospects for people with her skillset etc.

It’s erroneous and I don’t think desirable to push kids to study only what will make them the most money: money is a terrible motivator and people end up doing what they want to anyway (or end up miserable). In addition to that, we need all kinds of people to make up a whole society, so you and I are in a position to help our kids work in the arts, which, beyond celebrity, is a vast industry with lots of opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can wholeheartedly encourage his chosen profession, but: (a) he is still a child, and doing well in school is his responsibility, so enforce that and (b) you have to have very candid conversations, plural, about the reality of being a working musician. I also have an artist child, who no matter what will certainly end up in the arts, and we talk frequently about job prospects for people with her skillset etc.

It’s erroneous and I don’t think desirable to push kids to study only what will make them the most money: money is a terrible motivator and people end up doing what they want to anyway (or end up miserable). In addition to that, we need all kinds of people to make up a whole society, so you and I are in a position to help our kids work in the arts, which, beyond celebrity, is a vast industry with lots of opportunities.

Exactly. It’s awful that the vast majority of people enjoy the arts in some way, but those same people consider going into the arts a waste.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

Because he will need intense musical training to get anywhere. The people he'll be competing against will have studied music, with private lessons, since early childhood.

Unless he’s going into jazz or classical, this is completely wrong.

Most successful rock musicians have had little or no formal musical training. Virtually none went to music school.

- Lifelong musician who has played classical and, for the last 20 years, rock in gigging cover and original bands

Which ones? I am thinking Ed Sheeran and Adam Levine and Alicia Keys etc, started early and intensely.

Ed Sheeran dropped out of music school his first year, at age 18 to go on tour and never returned.


Adam Levine has no intense musical training that I can find. He formed his first band when he was 15. They got a record deal. He did less than one semester of college and dropped out.

Alicia Keys is the only person in your list who received intense musical training. She dropped out of Columbia.

Ed Sheeran took piano lessons since he was 4 and performed all his childhood, he even has footage of his young self in one of his music videos. Adam Levine comes from a very musical family and had music lessons all his life, that's how he was able to form a band at 14. Alicia Keys was classically trained. Taylor Swift took voice lessons from a very young age, her mom used to drive her all the way to NY.

There is zero chance a 15 year old with no formal music training can be successful nowadays. Formal does not mean conservatory, but conservatory or a music program will help someone who comes to the game later on in life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can wholeheartedly encourage his chosen profession, but: (a) he is still a child, and doing well in school is his responsibility, so enforce that and (b) you have to have very candid conversations, plural, about the reality of being a working musician. I also have an artist child, who no matter what will certainly end up in the arts, and we talk frequently about job prospects for people with her skillset etc.

It’s erroneous and I don’t think desirable to push kids to study only what will make them the most money: money is a terrible motivator and people end up doing what they want to anyway (or end up miserable). In addition to that, we need all kinds of people to make up a whole society, so you and I are in a position to help our kids work in the arts, which, beyond celebrity, is a vast industry with lots of opportunities.

What are the vast opportunities for someone who has a passion for soccer or acting? It's important for parents to lay out the facts and figures on demand and supply for any given passion, it's the loving thing to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Get him guitar lessons and start looking into colleges with great schools of music.

He needs to do his homework to get into college.

Why does he have to go to college?

He should graduate high school, but if he really wants to pursue music, he doesn’t need a college degree.

Because he will need intense musical training to get anywhere. The people he'll be competing against will have studied music, with private lessons, since early childhood.

Unless he’s going into jazz or classical, this is completely wrong.

Most successful rock musicians have had little or no formal musical training. Virtually none went to music school.

- Lifelong musician who has played classical and, for the last 20 years, rock in gigging cover and original bands

Which ones? I am thinking Ed Sheeran and Adam Levine and Alicia Keys etc, started early and intensely.

Ed Sheeran dropped out of music school his first year, at age 18 to go on tour and never returned.


Adam Levine has no intense musical training that I can find. He formed his first band when he was 15. They got a record deal. He did less than one semester of college and dropped out.

Alicia Keys is the only person in your list who received intense musical training. She dropped out of Columbia.

Ed Sheeran took piano lessons since he was 4 and performed all his childhood, he even has footage of his young self in one of his music videos. Adam Levine comes from a very musical family and had music lessons all his life, that's how he was able to form a band at 14. Alicia Keys was classically trained. Taylor Swift took voice lessons from a very young age, her mom used to drive her all the way to NY.

There is zero chance a 15 year old with no formal music training can be successful nowadays. Formal does not mean conservatory, but conservatory or a music program will help someone who comes to the game later on in life.

I’m not saying music lessons aren’t helpful.

I’m disagreeing with the people who say the kid needs music school and “conservatory studies.”

[Anonymous]

OP here. He has been taking music lessons at the age of six but he is getting much more serious with music lessons after this summer. He used to practice one hour a day but now it is from 5pm until 11pm everyday and more like 8 hours on Saturday and Sunday. He literally drops homework and sports from the calendar. I am all for supporting him but this is too much. I can threaten to take away his phone and music lessons but he doesn't seem to care.