Inappropriate weight room dude

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea I would complain to the hotel. What did you say to him when he “corrected” you?

OP never described being "corrected". He merely made a suggestion to both OP and her DD providing options to try, but did not "correct". Also the title of the thread is misleading - what she described is not at all inappropriate. I opened the thread thinking I was going to read something really alarming.

OP here. I disagree. I think it's inappropriate for an older man to be watching the women at a gym (even if he works there) and approaching them with "pointers" -- in my DD's case telling her to leave one machine and try a different one.

I say this as someone who has been in the weight room of my gym for years, surrounded by mostly guys, and never had this experience.

Also, it's just insulting to think that I, an adult woman, can't handle the barbell I am holding and need someone to come along and give me a tip. If I had been struggling, then it might make sense.

I don’t think he should approach solely women to give them advice, but as for “watching women at the gym,” his job is probably boring as hell and he watches everyone who comes in. I am a woman and I watch both men and women at my gym—what they’re wearing, what they’re lifting, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yea I would complain to the hotel. What did you say to him when he “corrected” you?

OP never described being "corrected". He merely made a suggestion to both OP and her DD providing options to try, but did not "correct". Also the title of the thread is misleading - what she described is not at all inappropriate. I opened the thread thinking I was going to read something really alarming.

Agree. He was giving suggestions. He wasn’t inappropriate. He offered, you said thanks, and everyone moved on

+1. He works there. You have no idea if someone directed him to come give you options or if he was just being genuine. Why is everyone so quick to assume the worst in people? Say thanks and move on.

Oh also, you’re traveling and obviously new to this gym. So you’ve spent an hour there? And made this big judgement about someone you’ve had one tiny interaction with?

He doesn’t know you, you don’t know him. How on earth would you know that he never corrects/gives guidance to men?

[Anonymous]

Not a big deal. Just smile and say thanks. He wasn't doing anything wrong or weird.

[Anonymous]

I am late 40s women who travels a lot for work and always uses the hotel gym. I would say something to the front desk manager.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am late 40s women who travels a lot for work and always uses the hotel gym. I would say something to the front desk manager.

I would not. What are they going to do? Tell their staff to stop addressing women? Tell their staff to never address women in the gym, even if they’re being unsafe? Complaining about this just makes women look bad. Say thanks and move on with your life like a normal person.

[Anonymous]

I thought men learned not to do this 20 years ago. It used to be very common and I agree, it’s annoying. They usually have bad advice too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am late 40s women who travels a lot for work and always uses the hotel gym. I would say something to the front desk manager.

I would not. What are they going to do? Tell their staff to stop addressing women? Tell their staff to never address women in the gym, even if they’re being unsafe? Complaining about this just makes women look bad. Say thanks and move on with your life like a normal person.

They will tell the guy to stop giving unsolicited feedback when the guest is not being unsafe. Also, it’s datapoints. Stuff like this is not usually a one-offf. Maybe this guy needs better training. Maybe he needs to go. But hotel staff do not want their guests to be uncomfortable. Hotel staff want guests to leave rave reviews and return and encourage their friends to return.

[Anonymous]

The weird thing about this thread is that I've been in many hotel gyms, and never seen a hotel staffer in there except occasionally the housekeeping staff to replace to towels or take out the trash. Only exception to this is the rare instance where you have a hotel connected to a genuine health club. But the typical hotel gym, there are no staff in there "helping" anyone.

[Anonymous]

The things people complain about

[Anonymous]

Jesus. For someone who lifts so much and is such a self proclaimed gym rat you sure seem dumbstruck by a very mild version of the most common gym annoyance out there. And it comes from both genders, in all disciplines, employee or not.

Many people who work out a ton or, god forbid, for a living are absolute zeroes with no social skills. They also are borderline spectrumy about wanting to tell you everything they know about working out.

Your example is utterly benign. “Oh I’m gonna complain to the hotel gym about a gym attendant giving me (safety) tips on working out.” Please.

Toughen up, muscles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Jesus. For someone who lifts so much and is such a self proclaimed gym rat you sure seem dumbstruck by a very mild version of the most common gym annoyance out there. And it comes from both genders, in all disciplines, employee or not.

Many people who work out a ton or, god forbid, for a living are absolute zeroes with no social skills. They also are borderline spectrumy about wanting to tell you everything they know about working out.

Your example is utterly benign. “Oh I’m gonna complain to the hotel gym about a gym attendant giving me (safety) tips on working out.” Please.

Toughen up, muscles.

OP here, this actually made me laugh.

I guess you are right.

But the truth is he creeped out both me and my daughter. He was clearly hovering and watching in a creepy way.

[Anonymous]

You’re embellishing this story now- to justify your complaint

[Anonymous]

This would have annoyed me too, OP. I don’t think it’s worth following up on, but yeah annoying.

[Anonymous]

Why should OP say “thanks” to someone that is giving her unsolicited advice? Tell him to move alone and mind his own damn business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he works there, he has an obligation to minizimize the gym's liability by calling out anything that's even potentially unsafe. So if you hurt yourself, they can say "We warned you."

He may or may not have been biased in his call-outs, you can't know. It's better to go through life giving the benefit of the doubt to people than being mad all the time.

This is absolutely NOT how gyms operate.