Who is the jerk in this situation?

[Anonymous]

The housekeeper will take the bags home so nothing wasted

[Anonymous]

Obviously the housekeeper, for not doing her job by herself and instead encroaching upon the time these two entitled whiners get to spend together.

[Anonymous]

Neither, but Lilly was wrong to be doing cleaning while she had a guest over. I don't invite my friends over to stand there and watch me iron or meal prep, you know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:ESH

Wait, why does the housekeeper suck?

PP and you are right -- I just meant the two parties in the disagreement suck, not that the housekeeper sucks! She's just doing her job. But the two friends are being catty and judgmental/defensive and need to learn to communicate more effectively (or to just be quiet, which is ALWAYS an option).

[Anonymous]

How many people does it take to supervise the housekeeper?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lilly should have taken the high road or at least own up to it ("yea, I feel bad"/"will do better next time"/"didn't realize Dh would be out of town all week" ""help me plan better!", etc)

Lilly should also not be doing household chores when a friend comes to visit.

Lilly feels guilty and didn't want to be called out on it, but then again that's what friends are for, right? Keeping you accountable.

This. We don't have enough information to judge the chore issue, but Lilly was the jerk.

[Anonymous]

Sanctimonious Megan.

[Anonymous]

Both were rude but Megan was ruder for making the first comment, if it was unprovoked. Lilly was snippy back and shouldn’t be proud of her behavior either. But, since everyone (besides the housekeeper) sounds childish here, I’ll go with the childish “Megan started it!” as my final answer.

[Anonymous]

Definitely Megan. It’s entirely possible to have thoughts without expressing them. What goodwill or pleasant outcome did she expect from this interaction? She is not morally superior because she comes from a poor village.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both were rude but Megan was ruder for making the first comment, if it was unprovoked. Lilly was snippy back and shouldn’t be proud of her behavior either. But, since everyone (besides the housekeeper) sounds childish here, I’ll go with the childish “Megan started it!” as my final answer.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Megan is at her friend Lilly's house. Lilly and the housekeeper were gathering up large bags of trash, emptying out the fridge. Megan made the comment, "Wow, the amount of food you toss out could feed by village back home for a week". Lilly said to her, "Well, you're more than welcome to pack this up and send it to them if that will make you feel superior".

Who was the jerk here?

Is this supposed to be “my”? As in Megan is from a village where food is scarce? If the scenario is that Megan is from a village in Uzbekistan where food is scarce, and made the comment in seriousness, then Lilly is the jerk.

[Anonymous]

I don't do chores like this in front of other people because everyone has a different tolerance for throwing out leftovers and old food. It's not worth having someone give you the fish eye (no pun intended).

[Anonymous]

Both people sound obnoxiously snippy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't do chores like this in front of other people because everyone has a different tolerance for throwing out leftovers and old food. It's not worth having someone give you the fish eye (no pun intended).

This, I’d never do this in front of someone else.

I’ve definitely thrown away a bunch of food before (leftovers and produce that we didn’t eat in time) and I understand that there’s not much you can do — once stuff turns, it’s not edible.

But even I feel a bit guilty when I do it, and the food waste bothers me.

So I get where they are both coming from but think Lilly invited commentary by doing this in front of a guest. If she didn’t want to discuss it, don’t do it right in front of someone.

[Anonymous]

Meghan for opening her mouth for the judgement and unnecessary commentary. Yes, wasting food is not good but making a rude comment in someone’s house isn’t going to fix anything.