Is 14 too young for gf/bf?

[Anonymous]

Yes. Dating is allowed at age 16 in our house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents please parent! There is no need to start dating at 14!!!

That’s not the question. The question is whether there’s a need to actively stop 14-year-olds from dating. And there’s not.

Sure there is. That’s too young to handle the emotional ups and down of a romantic relationship.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Getting into a relationship at 14 was developmentally normal when kids then got married at 18 or 20. Now, there is no developmental need or benefit to being in a relationship at 14. Fouteen year olds don't need relationship experiences.

I wouldn't invite her over. They can go to a coffee shop or hang out at lunch at school.

+1 This exactly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents please parent! There is no need to start dating at 14!!!

That’s not the question. The question is whether there’s a need to actively stop 14-year-olds from dating. And there’s not.

Sure there is. That’s too young to handle the emotional ups and down of a romantic relationship.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Friend of mine had a baby at 14. Yes, it's too young.

So did one of my coworkers. Agree, it’s too young.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Starter relationships are normal and appropriate at this age. They are practicing for the real thing some day. Better to learn and make mistakes under your roof.

Let me guess, you also allow the teens to drink in your home so you can monitor them?!

Why, no. What a strange comparison. Underage drinking is illegal and developmentally inappropriate. You are comparing apples and socks. Were you born stupid or is this learned behavior?

What’s stupid is saying a 14 year old needs to date for “practice.” Lol.

[Anonymous]

It's normal in this culture. Nothing much you can do about it. Discuss birth control, STDs, and consent with him.

[Anonymous]

It’s normal. I was “dating” like this back in the 80s in middle school. It was group dates at the mall and occasionally meeting at peoples houses. It was really innocent.

Be nice and treat her as you would any friend. It’s a good thing that your 14 yo wants to bring any people over to your house. You can get to know who he’s hanging out with.

You can’t forbid dating. They can “date” at school without even going anywhere.

[Anonymous]

Not for Children of some families. Statistics also have to come from somewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s normal. I was “dating” like this back in the 80s in middle school. It was group dates at the mall and occasionally meeting at peoples houses. It was really innocent.

Be nice and treat her as you would any friend. It’s a good thing that your 14 yo wants to bring any people over to your house. You can get to know who he’s hanging out with.

You can’t forbid dating. They can “date” at school without even going anywhere.

+1. They will see each other at school, get together in groups, and text and FaceTime each other. You’re essentially just trying to prevent them from hanging out one on one, which they will figure out ways to do (“group” hangouts that aren’t, etc.). You can’t control their feelings either, but you definitely will heighten them if you add in the drama of parents forbidding them to hang out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents please parent! There is no need to start dating at 14!!!

That’s not the question. The question is whether there’s a need to actively stop 14-year-olds from dating. And there’s not.

Sure there is. That’s too young to handle the emotional ups and down of a romantic relationship.

As opposed to when they’re 16 and starting to have more serious relationships?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s normal. I was “dating” like this back in the 80s in middle school. It was group dates at the mall and occasionally meeting at peoples houses. It was really innocent.

Be nice and treat her as you would any friend. It’s a good thing that your 14 yo wants to bring any people over to your house. You can get to know who he’s hanging out with.

You can’t forbid dating. They can “date” at school without even going anywhere.

+1. They will see each other at school, get together in groups, and text and FaceTime each other. You’re essentially just trying to prevent them from hanging out one on one, which they will figure out ways to do (“group” hangouts that aren’t, etc.). You can’t control their feelings either, but you definitely will heighten them if you add in the drama of parents forbidding them to hang out.

It just teaches them early to hide things from their parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents please parent! There is no need to start dating at 14!!!

That’s not the question. The question is whether there’s a need to actively stop 14-year-olds from dating. And there’s not.

What sort of parenting have you been doing that you’re terrified of your 14-year-old dating?

Apparently very good parenting. There is no need to have kids start dating at 14 - it only leads to negative outcomes.

Interesting that your idea of good parenting is apparently to keep your kids isolated from situations where they might have to make good decisions rather than teaching them to make good decisions.

[Anonymous]

I have a 10yo DD. I think I’d be ok with the kind of dating the OP described. Meeting in a coffee shop or hanging out at a house with a parent present.

[Anonymous]

They’re more like friends with mutual crushes at that age.

16+ is when you have to start worrying about sex and pregnancy