Dropping out at CMU.

[Anonymous]

Have him checked for ADHD. I should've at that age but didn't and kept thinking I'm not trying hard enough. I did manage to finish medical school on time and decent grades but years of insecurity took a toll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If possible, I'd encourage him to drop one class (his hardest and most dreaded) and focus on fewer classes. If he relied on AP classes to skip basic math or science courses, I'd encourage him to retake those classes at CMU. Shore up that foundation.

He could also consider changing majors or transferring, but I'd support him seeing if he can do it more slowly. I'd also consider having him do a co-op semester in the spring so he can get a feel for his intended career.

OP when someone tells her kid "do the $75k a year school more slowly"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

Good for him. You have a very, very mature kid OP!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If possible, I'd encourage him to drop one class (his hardest and most dreaded) and focus on fewer classes. If he relied on AP classes to skip basic math or science courses, I'd encourage him to retake those classes at CMU. Shore up that foundation.

He could also consider changing majors or transferring, but I'd support him seeing if he can do it more slowly. I'd also consider having him do a co-op semester in the spring so he can get a feel for his intended career.

OP when someone tells her kid "do the $75k a year school more slowly"

It's one semester and he can make up those credits at a community college while on co-op. No need to be so dramatic. Also, you need to balance out the lost earning potential from a lost semester and lost momentum against continuing to progress towards a degree. If his metal health is really rough, it may not be an option, but if he's just overwhelmed then dropping one class may be enough.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

Hugs!

[Anonymous]

It’s a nerdy, soulless place and really only good for a small fraction of people. Walk down Forbes Ave, immediately adjacent to Pitt & CMU dorms — you’ll 100% be able to spot which school the kid attends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

Wise of him and bravo to you for supporting him.

[Anonymous]

God bless your son and all best to him and to you. This too shall pass, and will get better, I just know it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

OP, your kid sounds level headed and smart to me. I am glad he came to a decision that suits him and is better for him. Don't let anyone give you grief trying to make you think he's somehow less-than. -person from a family of engineers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

Good for him. I am certain he can transfer to another program with an environment that is more healthy for him. He will do well in the end!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My DS had a very hard time academically at CMU last year; however, he decided to give it a try by coming back this year. Based on the past two weeks, he feels like it is going to get much harder and he will not make it. Today is the last day to drop classes for a full refund. He wants to take off at least this semester to decide what he will do next, possibly transfer to a state school in Virginia. He admitted that CMU is a difficult place to succeed even when he spends at least 70 hours a week to study and it is effecting his mental health.

Anyone with kids dropping out of CMU recently?

Totally let him do whatever works for him. His mental health is more important. He is a smart kud, who'll find something where his hard work makes him happy and successful.

OP here. DS just confirmed that he cancelled all of his classes for this semester and going home once he can find someone to take over his lease. He will take off this semester and is looking into transfer. He still wants to major in Computer Engineering at another university.

Good for him. I am certain he can transfer to another program with an environment that is more healthy for him. He will do well in the end!!

OP here.  Thank you for your kind words.

DS has two cousins, same age, who were not accepted by CMU and are currently attending UVA Computer Engineering major.  They are very happy at UVA, and have plenty of time for socializing there.  That's one of the destinations that DS is looking into.  The other is VT. 

I told him his well being is the most important thing and that I support him wherever he decides to end up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have him checked for ADHD. I should've at that age but didn't and kept thinking I'm not trying hard enough. I did manage to finish medical school on time and decent grades but years of insecurity took a toll.

How is it that your ADHD became apparent in college but not K-12?

Also, CMU is hard. Even smart kids without ADHD can find it hard and stressful. Why must people jump to ADHD even when there is zero evidence of it.

[Anonymous]

If they’re grade are so bad they had to transfer, how are the getting into UVA or VT?