Are you afraid to mention a Black person’s tan?

[Anonymous]

I tease my close black friends about their tans. Everyone should be careful in the sun.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A tan on a white person is going to be a bigger contrast than a tan on a dark skinned person. I would not mention it. I'm white and one time someone commented that I didn't tan after going to the beach (I used sunscreen.)

Hmm, I actually don’t think so.

Anyway, not all Black people are dark skinned. (I’m not saying you don’t know this, PP; I’m just stating a point.) Even still, it’s quite easy to notice a person is several shades darker…whether they are dark or light skinned. Maybe white people just don’t pay attention. I notice a tan on Black people quite easily. Of course, I know a lot of Black people…so, I see more Black faces.

Y’all need to associate with more Black people.

[OP]

[Anonymous]

Depends on how well I know the person. Coworker- NO I don't think it's appropriate to talk about personal appearance at work and esp skin tone talk is even less appropriate.

A black friend I shoot the shit/drink with and I know then well- absolutely I would tease them. 😜

- white lady

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can't go wrong with "you are glowing!"

+1 seriously, op.

I’d comment on how relaxed they look, glowing, etc. I’d never comment on the color of their skin regardless of the shade they left with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on how well I know the person. Coworker- NO I don't think it's appropriate to talk about personal appearance at work and esp skin tone talk is even less appropriate.

A black friend I shoot the shit/drink with and I know then well- absolutely I would tease them. 😜

- white lady

I appreciate your opinion, PP. Thank you!

[OP]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't go wrong with "you are glowing!"

+1 seriously, op.

I’d comment on how relaxed they look, glowing, etc. I’d never comment on the color of their skin regardless of the shade they left with.

^^Yeah. This is kind of what I mean. My Black co-worker would say, “Hey, nice tan!” My white co-worker would say, “You’re glowing!”

🤣🤣

I get it. I really do.

Personally, this is usually how I can tell if people have Black friends, IRL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A tan on a white person is going to be a bigger contrast than a tan on a dark skinned person. I would not mention it. I'm white and one time someone commented that I didn't tan after going to the beach (I used sunscreen.)

Hmm, I actually don’t think so.

Anyway, not all Black people are dark skinned. (I’m not saying you don’t know this, PP; I’m just stating a point.) Even still, it’s quite easy to notice a person is several shades darker…whether they are dark or light skinned. Maybe white people just don’t pay attention. I notice a tan on Black people quite easily. Of course, I know a lot of Black people…so, I see more Black faces.

Y’all need to associate with more Black people.

[OP]

I didn't say I don't notice tans on Black people. It is noticeable. There is no good answer to your question. If we don't tell a black person nice tan, then you assume we're not around Black people enough. If we do tell a Black person nice tan, how would that come across? Probably not very good either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A tan on a white person is going to be a bigger contrast than a tan on a dark skinned person. I would not mention it. I'm white and one time someone commented that I didn't tan after going to the beach (I used sunscreen.)

Hmm, I actually don’t think so.

Anyway, not all Black people are dark skinned. (I’m not saying you don’t know this, PP; I’m just stating a point.) Even still, it’s quite easy to notice a person is several shades darker…whether they are dark or light skinned. Maybe white people just don’t pay attention. I notice a tan on Black people quite easily. Of course, I know a lot of Black people…so, I see more Black faces.

Y’all need to associate with more Black people.

[OP]

I didn't say I don't notice tans on Black people. It is noticeable. There is no good answer to your question. If we don't tell a black person nice tan, then you assume we're not around Black people enough. If we do tell a Black person nice tan, how would that come across? Probably not very good either.

Normal. 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

[Anonymous]

I’m not afraid to say it to anyone per se, but given that skin tone can be a prickly subject I wouldn’t say anything unless I knew the person really well. A friend who took a long awaited beach trip and had been worried that it would rain the whole time? “It looks like you had some fun in the sun- hooray!” A coworker I don’t know well looks darker than she did a month ago? Not saying a word.

[Anonymous]

I'm an old white guy. My next door neighbor is an old black guy. He once saw me on my front stoop holding my year-old grandson who was only wearing a diaper. He laughed and yelled over the fence: "that's the biggest, whitest baby I've ever seen!" I yelled back "you should see his father!"

He's pretty light skinned, and if he ever went to the beach and came back with a tan I'm sure I'd notice and if I did I'd absolutely say something. We'd laugh about that too.

Folks need to chill out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm an old white guy. My next door neighbor is an old black guy. He once saw me on my front stoop holding my year-old grandson who was only wearing a diaper. He laughed and yelled over the fence: "that's the biggest, whitest baby I've ever seen!" I yelled back "you should see his father!"

He's pretty light skinned, and if he ever went to the beach and came back with a tan I'm sure I'd notice and if I did I'd absolutely say something. We'd laugh about that too.

Folks need to chill out.

Love this!

[Anonymous]

I will compliment anyone’s tan regardless of color. I’m from Texas and unwoke.

[Anonymous]

I feel like commenting on black people's skin tone is one of those things I am willing to give up to avoid the possibility of being an asshole. Costs/benefits.

[Anonymous]

T’ve only commented about tabs with family members. We had a couple of them in my family addicted to tanning beds in the 90s or early 2000s. We would comment that they looked orange and needs to stop.

I can’t imagine seeing someone back from vacation and commenting about their tan, unless they came back completely sunburned and saying something like ouch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like commenting on black people's skin tone is one of those things I am willing to give up to avoid the possibility of being an asshole. Costs/benefits.

You need more black friends. You might discover that they're more reasonable than you think.