Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior

[Anonymous]

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704111504576059713528698754.html?mod=WSJ_LifeStyle_Lifestyle_5

Fascinating look at Chinese-American parenting. Confirms and embraces the stereotypes. My kids refused to apply to TJ because they said they didn't want to compete with kids from families like these -- they knew how hard they'd have to work!

[Anonymous]

No wonder many of these kids (not specifically Chinese, but just kids parented this way) have no social skills. Come on, we all know someone from high school or college who was pushed this way and as a result the kid had no clue how to actually communicate with people, carry on a friendly conversation or interact in a casual environment. This kind of parenting creates socially stunted development IMHO and I feel terrible for these children. No playdates? No sleepovers? No social life. SAD!

[Anonymous]

It's sad I agree, no playdates or tv ever?

[Anonymous]

This might work for children of first or second generation immigrants but I think the children are more likely to become Westernized the longer the family has been in America. I have heard Mexican parents worry their children will not be as family oriented as time goes on and future generations are integrated into Western society.

[Anonymous]

Um Mexico is western society too

[Anonymous]

'stereotypically successful'? Basically, just academically successful. That doesn't mean a happy life or good relationships.

I work in healthcare and we see quite a few Asian patients in my area. Find quite a few are on mood-altering meds.

[Anonymous]

I attended grad school with children raised like this, and they didn't do any better than the rest of us, and none of them were truly excellent.

There's something to the high expectations, and definitely something to the active engagement, but I truly worry about mothers like this one who clearly have no perspective.

My kid is learning moonlight sonata right now - on his own, with no help from me (it is out of my league). It is probably too hard for him, and he'll probably abandon midway (perhaps to come back to it when he's ready?), but isn't the striving what it is about?

[Anonymous]

Those poor kids.

[Anonymous]

It would be interesting to hear from the kids. I thought the scenario at the end of the article, with the daughter learning to play the piece was very sad. I wanted to glean something from the article I might be able to put into play, but I just though it was a hard way for a kid to grow up.

[Anonymous]

I think her daughters, and others raised just like them, have Stockholm syndrome.

[Anonymous]

Wow. Mom sounds like a real peach. I hope my kids go int psychiatry/psychology, there is clearly a fortune to be made there helping all of those kids.

[Anonymous]

Both Chinese mothers I know shipped their newborns to their parents in China who raised them for a year.
If that's what you call superior....

[Anonymous]

Oh. This is going to be good.

[Anonymous]

The mom in this article needs to read that other thread about 'mean things my parents said to me'.

Chinese parents may be able to say 'Hey Fatty - lose some weight' because it's socially acceptable, but that doesn't mean that the kids aren't hurt by it.

I grew up with parents like this. I was first in my HS class, went to a good college. I eventually learned about balance later on in life and am completely happy, but I have a horrible relationship with my parents. And, I'm so resentful that I missed out on a fun childhood. I know that school is important, but kids grow up quickly enough. Let them have some time to play and enjoy their childhoods without all this pressure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Both Chinese mothers I know shipped their newborns to their parents in China who raised them for a year.
If that's what you call superior....

my american co-worker hired someone to be with the kids while thyre awake. she leaves before they wake up and comes back after they're in bed. not too different.