“Why Did We Ever Send Sick Kids to School?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can honestly say that in 31 years of parenting five children I have never knowingly sent a child to school sick. Parents who do this are just the worst.

+1 I have four kids. But I also work from home.

The households where both parents work outside the home, who don't have family close by, and who have multiple kids are in an extremely tough position. Just with dentist appointments and well visits and other standard stuff I could have an appointment once a week. Add in sick kids, few weeks go by in the winter without interruptions. I have a flexible schedule but people who don't have to make complicated decisions.

But it was your choice to have four kids in a dual income household. You had them knowing what your responsibilities are. I had two coworkers going through chemo last year, with kids coming in sick because, “I have a meeting,” parents don’t realize the implications of their actions. You have a moral obligation to keep your sick children home and have a babysitter/family member care for them. The classroom is not a warehouse for sick students. When the nurse tries to send them back to class, I’m happy to let her know that the child is welcome to stay with her or sit in the front office for the remainder of the day.

I just said that I have never knowingly sent a child sick to school. In fact, I totally restructured my career to be able to take on these responsibilties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is no childcare for sick children. You can't send them to daycare or school. Period. As a parent, it is YOUR job to care for your child when they are sick. Exclusively. Period. It is the fault of YOUR boss and YOUR job if you can't take a sick day to care for your child. It is ridiculous to suggest we should have "school" (babysitting) available for 365 days a year to accommodate your employer. Do you know how much that would cost taxpayers? We are not a babysitting service, and we are certainly not an infirmary. As a teacher, I'm absolutely not responsible for advocating for your sick leave, nor would you advocate for teachers to get additional sick leave to account for all the illnesses we contract being exposed to your sick children. I already see threads here complaining every time their child's teacher calls out, as if it is any of their business why. In the past, I have reached out to let parents know I would be out on x day (as a courtesy, not a requirement), and had them ask me the reason for the absence. Totally inappropriate.

Is anyone else floored by the tone of this post? I mean, the complete contempt for parents and kids is just stunning. The complete lack of empathy for parents who aren't privileged enough to have sick leave and backup childcare is just stunning. And I tend to agree that sick kids should be kept home whenever possible.

This attitude, right here, is why parents are losing patience with teachers.

I probably would have been shocked by it a year ago but now it doesn’t even register with me. They hate us and hate our kids. Sad but true.

What kind of attitude do you expect from a group of people you spend all day vilifying? That we would be thrilled to contract your germs and agree that whatever you’re doing all day is much more important than parenting? If I hear one more time that returning to school is “a risk we must take” I will scream. You don’t mean we-you mean teachers and school staff, and the “risk” is death.

In this thread you have parents arguing that because it’s stressful for their child to have to make up work that they’ll come to school ill. As an adult with a job, I’m also expected to make up anything I miss when I’m out, even if it means working more than usual for a few days. Why should your 16 year old be any different? In college, your high schooler will also have to independently complete make up work. That’s life.

There are also parents here saying that they’re not responsible for “protecting teachers from every germ”. If anyone had actually read the article that this thread is supposed to discuss, it was written by a parent whose asthmatic child is often hospitalized after exposure to “minor” illnesses at school. When I was a student in elementary school, the principal had to send out a pleading letter to families to stop sending kids who were queasy or had diarrhea to school because there was a nasty stomach bug going around and one of the first graders was undergoing treatment for leukemia. It could have killed the child. It doesn’t just impact teachers. We know you hate teachers and they should be exposed to all your children’s germs to punish them for being so selfish and terrible, but unfortunately you can’t control who gets sick when you send Johnny to school with the flu (I mean, “a cough and a low grade fever” per the parent I was responding to).

If you are a teacher, you aren't doing your profession any favors as you continually reinforce the fact that you are hostile, dismissive, and not particularly bright. Otherwise, you would understand that public health guidance changes depending on the prevailing public health concerns. What was once not a reason to exclude a child from school, i.e. a cold, requires school exclusion in the age of COVID. Similarly, in my school, diarrhea was not a reason to exclude children from school as long as there is no blood or mucus in the stools and it could be contained in the toilet (and the child could participate in activities). However, in the situation you describe, when there is an outbreak of a viral illness or a child who is immunocompromised, that advice might change. It doesn't make parents who heeded the guidelines monsters or villains.

Personally, I think the part of the article that mentions the problem of kids coming to school with "snot" is ridiculous. That's a cold, and keeping kids out of school for every would result in weeks, of not months, of missed school. I know it's not important to you, but we, as a society, need to make compromises for the sake of education.

As to making up work, the point isn't that kids have to make up the work. The point is that teachers don't give them the opportunity to make it up. So if you want to encourage sick teenagers to stay home, have a chat with your colleagues and look in the mirror and ask why they aren't more helpful to teenagers who have been out sick. That's completely on the teaching profession, not parents.

Teachers are stupid because they don’t agree that it’s cool to send your kids to school with active diarrhea? That’s a wild take. Further, did your child needs help in the bathroom, you’ll also be getting a call. There’s no way I’m calling administration to cover my class so I can expose myself to your child’s bodily fluids, when you, the parent, knowingly sent them to school sick. This is why schools are closed in so many areas, sorry. Parents think that school means abdicating all parental responsibility, five days a week. It does not, whether you work or not. Teachers know this attitude won’t change this year or next, when COVID will certainly still be circulating. Oftentimes COVID symptoms present as cold symptoms in children. You’re not going to be able to send a coughing child to school, nor a child with a headache, a runny nose, or a sore throat. This is the new normal, and you’ll have to get them tested if you want to return them to school, or complete a mandatory quarantine period.

If you think every person with a compromised immune system is known to you, you’re living in a fantasy world. You have a responsibility to the community to prevent the spread of viral illnesses by keeping your child home when sick. You admit that you don’t intend to do that. Conversation over.

Hahahaha you think kids will be kicked out of school for a headache. It’s fun to say extreme things that are completely unreasonable and not plausible at all! I too like to live in angry fantasy land.

[Anonymous]

Haven't read the whole thread but I have chronic rhinitis. If a runny nose means we can't go into buildings, I would literally never leave my house. This is how many of us live. It's unrealistic to demand people with runny noses never leave the house.

[Anonymous]

I will never forget all the times my parents sent me to school sick and miserable, because I wasn't throwing up and didn't have a fever.

It was insane, because I was a good kid who earned good grades and would have happily done my work at home in comfort and not infecting others. Would never do this to my kids.

[Anonymous]

I hate it when people send their kids to school sick because mine always pick up every illness that comes along, and one is prone to pneumonia. So, no, I don't think we should send kids to school sick if we can help it. But the hateful tone of some of these posts by people who purport to be teachers convinces me more than ever that the people who work with our kids actually hate kids (or maybe they just hate parents). Jeez.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Haven't read the whole thread but I have chronic rhinitis. If a runny nose means we can't go into buildings, I would literally never leave my house. This is how many of us live. It's unrealistic to demand people with runny noses never leave the house.

I am one of those people too and so is one of my kids. That's why I get so annoyed by some of those holier than thou people talking about "snotty noses" before COVID-19. I was the poster who mentioned making my kid wear a mask to make other people feel better. You can't catch his allergies or mine, but some people are consumed with anger about things that shouldn't matter.

FYI, it my younger son's private school, students can provide documentation of a chronic condition, like runny nose, so that it would not necessarily require exclusion from school unless it as accompanied by other, new symptoms, like a headache. Obviously easier to do with a smaller population, but . . .

In addition, as noted above, using Maryland's definition of "COVID-19-like" illness, you would not meet that definition without a runny nose AND another symptom like fever of 100.4 or higher (measured or subjective), chills or shaking chills, muscle aches, headache, sore throat, nausea or vomiting, diarrhea, or fatigue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

There is no childcare for sick children. You can't send them to daycare or school. Period. As a parent, it is YOUR job to care for your child when they are sick. Exclusively. Period. It is the fault of YOUR boss and YOUR job if you can't take a sick day to care for your child. It is ridiculous to suggest we should have "school" (babysitting) available for 365 days a year to accommodate your employer. Do you know how much that would cost taxpayers? We are not a babysitting service, and we are certainly not an infirmary. As a teacher, I'm absolutely not responsible for advocating for your sick leave, nor would you advocate for teachers to get additional sick leave to account for all the illnesses we contract being exposed to your sick children. I already see threads here complaining every time their child's teacher calls out, as if it is any of their business why. In the past, I have reached out to let parents know I would be out on x day (as a courtesy, not a requirement), and had them ask me the reason for the absence. Totally inappropriate.

Is anyone else floored by the tone of this post? I mean, the complete contempt for parents and kids is just stunning. The complete lack of empathy for parents who aren't privileged enough to have sick leave and backup childcare is just stunning. And I tend to agree that sick kids should be kept home whenever possible.

This attitude, right here, is why parents are losing patience with teachers.

I'm a parent. And I get absolutely LIVID when people send their kids to school sick. Not a cold, but sick. My child has had all sorts of illness b/c selfish parents can't be bothered to keep their kids home when sick.

EVERY. SINGLE. YEAR until this year, I've had 1 or more emails sent home admonishing parents for sending their kids to school with diarrhea, fevers, etc., but on meds to get them through the initial day. They go to the clinic and MAYBE parents pick them up. In the meantime, they've infected half the school. It's ridiculous.

I don't care what you think of my tone.

Fevers, vomitting, etc. Fine. They should stay home. Cold - no (at least pre-COVID).

The person in the article complained about snotty kids coming to school. That's a cold and that is a selfish, unjustified demand (before COVID) that all kids with cold symptoms like a runny nose be kept home from school.

Agree to an extent. But, besides the spread, sometimes the kids feel awful with a cold but parents send them to school because "no fever" or not puking. They kids, by then, are usually spewing their juices all over giving their germs to everyone else. And b) the kid feels bad. LET THEM REST.

[Anonymous]

To sum up:

If you possibly can, when your kid is clearly sick, including symptoms such as fever or GI issues in the past 24 hours, keep them home. The vast majority don't care about a runny nose with no other symptoms in a kid who clearly has normal energy levels. No one expects a person with congestion due to allergies to stay home. Kids can keep wearing masks sometimes at school if they need to.

We should all work to change the culture, so that all workers have access to adequate sick leave and so that this idea that you have to push through illness at school or at a job is recognized as bat-sh*t.

With the changes that have been made during the pandemic, there should be no reason that people can't join meetings remotely if they are sick but otherwise able to do so or that kids, particularly the high-schoolers, could not attend virtually when sick but able to do so.

[Anonymous]

^^ NP. And possibly consider changes to laws that restrict the ability of parents to leave their kids home unattended during the day. Noone is advocating leaving little kids alone, but some 8 year olds are mature enough to stay home alone for part of the day (I was) — but parents are afraid of a child endangerment investigation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To sum up:

If you possibly can, when your kid is clearly sick, including symptoms such as fever or GI issues in the past 24 hours, keep them home. The vast majority don't care about a runny nose with no other symptoms in a kid who clearly has normal energy levels. No one expects a person with congestion due to allergies to stay home. Kids can keep wearing masks sometimes at school if they need to.

We should all work to change the culture, so that all workers have access to adequate sick leave and so that this idea that you have to push through illness at school or at a job is recognized as bat-sh*t.

With the changes that have been made during the pandemic, there should be no reason that people can't join meetings remotely if they are sick but otherwise able to do so or that kids, particularly the high-schoolers, could not attend virtually when sick but able to do so.

No one posting on here is in a position to do anything about sick leave policy at workplaces.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not only kids are sick at school. Teachers come to school with strep and other contagious diseases.

Yes, parents bitch if teachers miss a day. So illnesses make their rounds. Teachers go to school sick, kids go to school sick and around we go.

Stricter illness policies are going to make things interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope that after the pandemic, some things remain like greater attention to hand washing, mask wearing, and staying home if sick. Hopefully there will be more understanding on both sides, parents keeping kids home, and teachers making it easier for kids to make up work. When my kids were younger, I dreaded any illness both from the perspective of time off from work, but even more so in terms of keeping up. We had several teachers who took a week or more to respond to emails, and it was impossible to make up missed work without getting hopelessly behind.

I agree with teachers about how ridiculous it is that pre-pandemic, there was never soap in the bathrooms. How is that acceptable on any level? Hand washing is the most important thing we can do to stop the spread of all types of illnesses and that needs to be prioritized. My kids attend private school, and they are in a steady routine of sanitizing their hands before and after every class, wiping down their desks at the end of each class, and washing well each time they use the bathroom. I would love to see all of these continue.

When it comes to colds, which with five kids were the bane of my existence when they were younger, I would gladly send my kids to school with masks anytime they were unwell but did not meet the criteria for exclusion from school. That would include lingering colds and even allergies if it would make people more comfortable.

This is a good compromise. I'd support it.

Those with allergies would be up in arms about it though. Yet, I remember many times after my kids had a playdate with a kid "that just had allergies" they caught those allergies...