How do you tell a child they life they knew is over?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD (6) thinks things will go back to normal soon. She obviously can't grasp the full impact of the situation yet, and thinks that one day she'll be able to see her grandparents, not a wear a mask, travel, hug friends, attend school. I've been very non-committal about the future because I don't want to negatively affect her mental health, but at some point she'll need to understand that things are different now and won't ever go back. I'm actually wondering if I'm doing her a disservice by putting it off, but I'm dreading it.

Anyway, how and when do you plan on having this conversation?

When I saw the title I assumed your house burned down or your husband died. Get a grip OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh? Haven't you been discussing it all along. Sounds like its a parenting issue.

She's 6. Explaining that her life is over is kinda tough, O Super Parent.

Her life is over?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh? Haven't you been discussing it all along. Sounds like its a parenting issue.

She's 6. Explaining that her life is over is kinda tough, O Super Parent.

Her life is over?

Her life as she knew it. Try to follow along.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don’t know anyone who isn’t following strict precautions? I must know a bunch of rebels. I’m not condoning it, but you would be shocked at how many people are just going about like it was the summer of 2019.

I don't have local friends, so I'm not 100% sure what people are doing. My friends on social media are in hardcore lockdown mode, yes. And stores are becoming more restrictive with mask mandates and such. So...yeah. From where I sit, things are getting more restrictive.

Move to Georgia or Florida, hon! people are throwing boating and luxury house parties and wear a mask to Costco bcs they have to, but eat in restaurants without masks. They one one of the reasons we can't get back to "normal." Maybe go on a walk. I am imagining that poor child locked up inside since March, which is truly child abuse!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don’t know anyone who isn’t following strict precautions? I must know a bunch of rebels. I’m not condoning it, but you would be shocked at how many people are just going about like it was the summer of 2019.

I don't have local friends, so I'm not 100% sure what people are doing. My friends on social media are in hardcore lockdown mode, yes. And stores are becoming more restrictive with mask mandates and such. So...yeah. From where I sit, things are getting more restrictive.

Move to Georgia or Florida, hon! people are throwing boating and luxury house parties and wear a mask to Costco bcs they have to, but eat in restaurants without masks. They one one of the reasons we can't get back to "normal." Maybe go on a walk. I am imagining that poor child locked up inside since March, which is truly child abuse!

She hasn't been locked up since March, stop reading things that aren't there. A PP hit on the fact I'm not worried about the virus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh? Haven't you been discussing it all along. Sounds like its a parenting issue.

She's 6. Explaining that her life is over is kinda tough, O Super Parent.

Her life is over?

Her life as she knew it. Try to follow along.

No it isn't. What the heck?? A six year old has probably only been in ''school'' for less than 2 years anyway (I know you're OP).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Huh? Haven't you been discussing it all along. Sounds like its a parenting issue.

She's 6. Explaining that her life is over is kinda tough, O Super Parent.

Her life is over?

Her life as she knew it. Try to follow along.

No it isn't. What the heck?? A six year old has probably only been in ''school'' for less than 2 years anyway (I know you're OP).

Yes, and she cries every night because she's not going back next month, while I lie and say it won't be much longer. You

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So... mine is 6 too. We talk about it a lot, but in a certain way. Factual but light...we set the tone, they adopt it. "yeah this might be one really weird school year! but one out of life isnt that bad right? at least we get to hang out!" "Its so awesome we have zoom to talk to grandpa during the germ problem, imagine if we didnt!" and I tell them we do not know if a vaccine will come for years, but, the scientists are working and will probably find some good treatments and things will ease up in a year. We have sprinkled these comments throughout the last few months adn it has helped. At first they thought it would be better by summer, but now they know its taking longer and we all just float on.

Problem is, DH is telling her we can go see people next summer without masks. This is super irresponsible since we all know the restrictions won't ever be lifted, but I'm the one who'll get to comfort a crying child when she finds out he lied, so what does he care?

Also, I refuse to lie about virtual interaction being healthy, so that's been tough.

Virtual action can be healthy. Is it ideal over a long period? No. Is it inherently and always UNhealthy? No.

Dramatic statements in stark black and white like the one you make above do not serve your children well. If you are freaked by virtual interactions they will pick up on that and be uneasy with any creative attempt friends make to play games "together" virtually, watch a movie that way and chat, etc. Some virtual interaction beats none at all, or interactions we should know are not healthy--like pods and play dates that pretend kids don't get and can't spread the virus.

[Anonymous]

Tell her that eventually it'll get better. This is not a permanent situation. Come on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD (6) thinks things will go back to normal soon. She obviously can't grasp the full impact of the situation yet, and thinks that one day she'll be able to see her grandparents, not a wear a mask, travel, hug friends, attend school. I've been very non-committal about the future because I don't want to negatively affect her mental health, but at some point she'll need to understand that things are different now and won't ever go back. I'm actually wondering if I'm doing her a disservice by putting it off, but I'm dreading it.

Anyway, how and when do you plan on having this conversation?

We have been incredibly cautious about this whole thing so we don't think the virus is a hoax and my husband is a pessimist but even he wouldn't say these things will NEVER happen again. Come on.

Do you know what new normal means?

DO YOU?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DD (6) thinks things will go back to normal soon. She obviously can't grasp the full impact of the situation yet, and thinks that one day she'll be able to see her grandparents, not a wear a mask, travel, hug friends, attend school. I've been very non-committal about the future because I don't want to negatively affect her mental health, but at some point she'll need to understand that things are different now and won't ever go back. I'm actually wondering if I'm doing her a disservice by putting it off, but I'm dreading it.

Anyway, how and when do you plan on having this conversation?

Listen - and I'm not being ironic here - you need help. Do you have a therapist you can talk to?
People freaking WILL (and some still do!) hug friends, attend school (some privates will be open as soon as this August), travel, and even ditch masks, eventually. A year from now, everything will be back to normal.
Reading some posts here, you'd think an asteroid hit the Earth and the surviving 50 humans all frequent DCUM. "Things are different now and won't ever go back". Geez.

Interesting. You've not heard the term "new normal" either? And you do realize the government never drops restrictions they institute, right?

I think you should go back to your social studies class. Seriously.

Right? I mean, I'm pretty sure at some point they lifted the rations they instituted during WWII. Or wait, do we still have to limit our use of butter? Maybe we do and I just forgot.

It was years of rationing. Don't play dumb. And we still have overreach at the airports, 19 years later.

You're right, it was YEARS. You are saying it will be your child's entire LIFETIME. Do you not see the difference? I feel sorry for your kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don’t know anyone who isn’t following strict precautions? I must know a bunch of rebels. I’m not condoning it, but you would be shocked at how many people are just going about like it was the summer of 2019.

I don't have local friends, so I'm not 100% sure what people are doing. My friends on social media are in hardcore lockdown mode, yes. And stores are becoming more restrictive with mask mandates and such. So...yeah. From where I sit, things are getting more restrictive.

You need to get out of the house. How do you have no local friends?!?

You've read this whole thread - the answer to that question is pretty apparent, I'd say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So... mine is 6 too. We talk about it a lot, but in a certain way. Factual but light...we set the tone, they adopt it. "yeah this might be one really weird school year! but one out of life isnt that bad right? at least we get to hang out!" "Its so awesome we have zoom to talk to grandpa during the germ problem, imagine if we didnt!" and I tell them we do not know if a vaccine will come for years, but, the scientists are working and will probably find some good treatments and things will ease up in a year. We have sprinkled these comments throughout the last few months adn it has helped. At first they thought it would be better by summer, but now they know its taking longer and we all just float on.

Problem is, DH is telling her we can go see people next summer without masks. This is super irresponsible since we all know the restrictions won't ever be lifted, but I'm the one who'll get to comfort a crying child when she finds out he lied, so what does he care?

No, we don't "all know the restrictions won't EVER be lifted." If you know that, PP, you know something most people don't. Should we listen to you? Are you in some real position to know this or you just an everyday ninny who is scared of her own shadow?

Not scared. We moved to a rural area last year and I actually don't go out anymore now that masks are required, and I'd still be traveling once a week if it wasn't for state restrictions (even our church isn't allowed to open). My lifestyle has drastically changed, DD has noticed, and I don't know how to tell her it's permanent.

It's not permanent so you don't have to tell her that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So... mine is 6 too. We talk about it a lot, but in a certain way. Factual but light...we set the tone, they adopt it. "yeah this might be one really weird school year! but one out of life isnt that bad right? at least we get to hang out!" "Its so awesome we have zoom to talk to grandpa during the germ problem, imagine if we didnt!" and I tell them we do not know if a vaccine will come for years, but, the scientists are working and will probably find some good treatments and things will ease up in a year. We have sprinkled these comments throughout the last few months adn it has helped. At first they thought it would be better by summer, but now they know its taking longer and we all just float on.

Problem is, DH is telling her we can go see people next summer without masks. This is super irresponsible since we all know the restrictions won't ever be lifted, but I'm the one who'll get to comfort a crying child when she finds out he lied, so what does he care?

Also, I refuse to lie about virtual interaction being healthy, so that's been tough.

Virtual action can be healthy. Is it ideal over a long period? No. Is it inherently and always UNhealthy? No.

Dramatic statements in stark black and white like the one you make above do not serve your children well. If you are freaked by virtual interactions they will pick up on that and be uneasy with any creative attempt friends make to play games "together" virtually, watch a movie that way and chat, etc. Some virtual interaction beats none at all, or interactions we should know are not healthy--like pods and play dates that pretend kids don't get and can't spread the virus.

NP, but the research says otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don’t know anyone who isn’t following strict precautions? I must know a bunch of rebels. I’m not condoning it, but you would be shocked at how many people are just going about like it was the summer of 2019.

I don't have local friends, so I'm not 100% sure what people are doing. My friends on social media are in hardcore lockdown mode, yes. And stores are becoming more restrictive with mask mandates and such. So...yeah. From where I sit, things are getting more restrictive.

You need to get out of the house. How do you have no local friends?!?

You've read this whole thread - the answer to that question is pretty apparent, I'd say.

Yeah, moving 11 months ago has NOTHING to do with it.

So do people like you, honestly. Why bothering making friends with hateful people?