In case anyone still thinks spanking is okay

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective.
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

[Anonymous]

I am shocked reading this thread. Would never have guessed so many in the DCUM would be okay with spanking. Barbaric.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective.
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

This is exactly what I would have said. Are you a guy or a girl, though?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

...

You're projecting. Get help.

Justify it all you like, perv. My parents didn't hit me. Sounds like yours did.

You're a sick, sick individual. Look forward to the day you make the news for all the child porn you have stashed on your laptop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” [b] The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective. [/b]
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

The first PP's experience is how I felt too. It was so anxiety provoking. I remember shaking and crying and trying to run away from him. It was terrifying. I also remember going to the bathroom afterward and pulling down my pants to see how red my butt was and it was always red and painful. I don't remember any of what I did to "earn" the spankings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am shocked reading this thread. Would never have guessed so many in the DCUM would be okay with spanking. Barbaric.

Yep. Maybe it's not actually so barbaric?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am shocked reading this thread. Would never have guessed so many in the DCUM would be okay with spanking. Barbaric.

Yep. Maybe it's not actually so barbaric?

Sheltered WASP female is shocked and thinks all of you are barbarians!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” [b] The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective. [/b]
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

The first PP's experience is how I felt too. It was so anxiety provoking. I remember shaking and crying and trying to run away from him. It was terrifying. I also remember going to the bathroom afterward and pulling down my pants to see how red my butt was and it was always red and painful. I don't remember any of what I did to "earn" the spankings.

Drama Queen Alert

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I spanked my kids probably a total of 3 times when they were toddlers and ran into the street. I wanted them to stay out of the street. You often don't get a second chance to learn that lesson. I didn't care if they stayed out of the street because they were scared I would spank them. Not dying was more important than that. Both are terrific teens with whom I have a great relationship! I think you really need to distinguish between how and why the child is being spanked.

Exactly. My mother did this to me (she told me, I don't remember it) and one day I had to do that to my son. He doesn't remember it either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” [b] The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective. [/b]
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

The first PP's experience is how I felt too. It was so anxiety provoking. I remember shaking and crying and trying to run away from him. It was terrifying. I also remember going to the bathroom afterward and pulling down my pants to see how red my butt was and it was always red and painful. I don't remember any of what I did to "earn" the spankings.

were you spanked bare butt?

[Anonymous]

I was spanked as a child, don't spank my own children, but have a far different perspective than many here. For me growing up, it worked. I would start to get sassy, talk back, etc.., and all my mom had to do was spank me and I shaped up. When I would slide back, she'd do it again. She did not do it from a place of anger, it was matter of fact. It wasn't terrifying, I don't have these awful memories of it, I remember that it taught a healthy respect for authority and served as a reminder. Yes I cried and it was upsetting, but of course it would be! If it wasn't it wouldn't be a punishment. The only reason I don't do it with my older is because I don't think it would work like it did with me. We have very different personalities and temperaments. I have a great relationship with my mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was spanked as a child, don't spank my own children, but have a far different perspective than many here. For me growing up, it worked. I would start to get sassy, talk back, etc.., and all my mom had to do was spank me and I shaped up. When I would slide back, she'd do it again. She did not do it from a place of anger, it was matter of fact. It wasn't terrifying, I don't have these awful memories of it, I remember that it taught a healthy respect for authority and served as a reminder. Yes I cried and it was upsetting, but of course it would be! If it wasn't it wouldn't be a punishment. The only reason I don't do it with my older is because I don't think it would work like it did with me. We have very different personalities and temperaments. I have a great relationship with my mom.

This was more or less true for me as a kid, and it's true for my kids now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” [b] The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective. [/b]
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

The first PP's experience is how I felt too. It was so anxiety provoking. I remember shaking and crying and trying to run away from him. It was terrifying. I also remember going to the bathroom afterward and pulling down my pants to see how red my butt was and it was always red and painful. I don't remember any of what I did to "earn" the spankings.

were you spanked bare butt?

I think the poster who was spanked by her dad (and also hit slapped etc. if it is the same poster) sounds like maybe she suffered some abuse. It's hard to follow who is who but if this is the poster whose dad was the one who used to use the belt on his first kids then it sounds like maybe a lot more was going on in their household which I am truly sorry to hear.

What I haven't heard much of in this thread is that children are not mini adults. Their mental faculties are not fully formed and that includes the ability to keep themselves out of harms way. Our child needs to know and understand that when mommy or daddy says stop something/type of behavior they stop immediately. That takes training. A few posters who admitted spanking to prevent the kid from running across the street or in the parking lot provided examples of this but there are many other types of examples. Training kids to know when no means no and when to stop something is not developed overnight. One doesn't always have the opportunity to explain the why behind things. That doesn't mean one never does, but it does mean that one's kids need to know when they just must listen and yes "obey". That is not say that one is authoritarian in one's upbringing, but it does mean for little kids in particular, they do need to know how to respect authority. Over time, that changes as they grow. Even though we spank, we still explain things to our kids and give them the opportunity to state their views. We talk about things (including why they are going to be spanked for x behavior). Spanking is one of many tools in the tool kit (not the only one). We still do time out. We still take things away from them. We use many tools on a day to day basis. We also apologize to our kids if we are wrong about something. If we've taken something away from them and find out that we were wrong in understanding what happened, we apologize. We all are trying to teach our kids so many different things every day. There is no right or wrong way. Abuse and spanking are not the same thing. For those who may have faced abuse growing up. I am truly sorry. If that is your reason for not spanking your kid then that is your right. No one should judge you for that. However, to judge others for incorporating spanking in their discipline toolbox is also not fair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” [b] The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective. [/b]
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

That's how it feels from "A" child's perspective. As in, you. I remember the feeling more like, "crap this sucks. I'm in big trouble, and it's gonna hurt." And then moving on with life. Hopefully you'll never have to actually make that walk to the electric chair, so the comparison to what your dad did will continue to be theoretical.

The first PP's experience is how I felt too. It was so anxiety provoking. I remember shaking and crying and trying to run away from him. It was terrifying. I also remember going to the bathroom afterward and pulling down my pants to see how red my butt was and it was always red and painful. I don't remember any of what I did to "earn" the spankings.

were you spanked bare butt?

I think the poster who was spanked by her dad (and also hit slapped etc. if it is the same poster) sounds like maybe she suffered some abuse. It's hard to follow who is who but if this is the poster whose dad was the one who used to use the belt on his first kids then it sounds like maybe a lot more was going on in their household which I am truly sorry to hear.

What I haven't heard much of in this thread is that children are not mini adults. Their mental faculties are not fully formed and that includes the ability to keep themselves out of harms way. Our child needs to know and understand that when mommy or daddy says stop something/type of behavior they stop immediately. That takes training. A few posters who admitted spanking to prevent the kid from running across the street or in the parking lot provided examples of this but there are many other types of examples. Training kids to know when no means no and when to stop something is not developed overnight. One doesn't always have the opportunity to explain the why behind things. That doesn't mean one never does, but it does mean that one's kids need to know when they just must listen and yes "obey". That is not say that one is authoritarian in one's upbringing, but it does mean for little kids in particular, they do need to know how to respect authority. Over time, that changes as they grow. Even though we spank, we still explain things to our kids and give them the opportunity to state their views. We talk about things (including why they are going to be spanked for x behavior). Spanking is one of many tools in the tool kit (not the only one). We still do time out. We still take things away from them. We use many tools on a day to day basis. We also apologize to our kids if we are wrong about something. If we've taken something away from them and find out that we were wrong in understanding what happened, we apologize. We all are trying to teach our kids so many different things every day. There is no right or wrong way. Abuse and spanking are not the same thing. For those who may have faced abuse growing up. I am truly sorry. If that is your reason for not spanking your kid then that is your right. No one should judge you for that. However, to judge others for incorporating spanking in their discipline toolbox is also not fair.

+1,000. Well said.

[Anonymous]

This thread is nuts. I wouldn't have expected these sentiments from this demographic.