In case anyone still thinks spanking is okay

[Anonymous]

I spanked my kids probably a total of 3 times when they were toddlers and ran into the street. I wanted them to stay out of the street. You often don't get a second chance to learn that lesson. I didn't care if they stayed out of the street because they were scared I would spank them. Not dying was more important than that. Both are terrific teens with whom I have a great relationship! I think you really need to distinguish between how and why the child is being spanked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We spanked occasionally, in the old fashioned "come over here and get over my lap" way.

Like someone said above, what it meant was that we ended up doing far less disciplining and punishing that we otherwise would have had to. It meant that we could be a lot more relaxed and have a lot more fun with our kids the other 99.8% of the time.

My youngest might still get a spanking occasionally, but it's very rare now.

I remember my dad telling me to “come over here and bend over my lap for your spanking.” The moment from that until I got to his lap were the most fearful moments of my life. It was terrifying to me. Much like I imagine it would fell to be walking to an execution. That’s how it feels from a child’s perspective.
That’s what I remember—NOT whatever behavior got me spanked.

The quest. Is whether you continued to commit the behavior that resulted in the spanking.

Yes. I continued the behavior but got better at just not getting caught.

+1. I would still never dream of confiding in my parents or ever go to them after I made a mistake. I do attribute that, in large part, to being spanked and hit as a child.

If you knew you'd get grounded or something else, do you really think it would make a difference? Probably not.

You are wrong. It was the humiliation of being struck that caused me to be secretive - not the fact that it was punishment. You can tell your friends you got grounded - you can't tell them you have been hit. Huge difference.

You are wrong. My friends and I told each other if we got a spanking.

Kids talk about spankings. My kid came home talking about it the other day. We've never spanked or even used that word so clearly it was talked about at school or at a friend's house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL...so many fragile white people here. Damn.

+1

They need a good spankin'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Still spanking over here.

lol yup +1 but these threads are entertaining

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL...so many fragile white people here. Damn.

+1

They need a good spankin'.

Ha! I was the kid of Korean immigrants, definitely FOB types. I remember realizing in like first or second grade...wait...there are kids who DON'T get spanked?! Who will never experience the rice paddle? Who will never get chopsticks across the knuckles? Crazy.

(FTR, my son is only 18 months and I do not plan to spank him.)

[Anonymous]

Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

Whoa there, you got something to say?

By the way, there are other minorities out there who 1. Aren't black and 2. Have cultures that do not view spanking with handwringing. The horror!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

Whoa there, you got something to say?

By the way, there are other minorities out there who 1. Aren't black and 2. Have cultures that do not view spanking with handwringing. The horror!

Black people use physical violence on children more often than whites. How's that working out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

...

You're projecting. Get help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

Whoa there, you got something to say?

By the way, there are other minorities out there who 1. Aren't black and 2. Have cultures that do not view spanking with handwringing. The horror!

Black people use physical violence on children more often than whites. How's that working out?

You tell us, racist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL...so many fragile white people here. Damn.

+1

They need a good spankin'.

Ha! I was the kid of Korean immigrants, definitely FOB types. I remember realizing in like first or second grade...wait...there are kids who DON'T get spanked?! Who will never experience the rice paddle? Who will never get chopsticks across the knuckles? Crazy.

(FTR, my son is only 18 months and I do not plan to spank him.)

Korean American immigrant here.

18months is still very young. I would never spank a child that young, but never say never. It was never a go to punishment for us. DH is from Europe, and he had no problem with open handed spanking on the bottom for our kids at times. Kids were around aged 4 or 5 to 8. Most of the time, it was done out of frustration when everything else we tried didn't work. Looking back, I regret some of it, but not all. Our kids are older now, and they don't have much behavioral issues, nor are they violent. Good students, and pretty good kids over all.

I was abused as a child -- face slaps, and more. There is definitely a difference between spanking and that kind of abuse. People who are comparing spanking on the bottom fully clothed to abuse are trivializing real abuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL...so many fragile white people here. Damn.

+1

They need a good spankin'.

Ha! I was the kid of Korean immigrants, definitely FOB types. I remember realizing in like first or second grade...wait...there are kids who DON'T get spanked?! Who will never experience the rice paddle? Who will never get chopsticks across the knuckles? Crazy.

(FTR, my son is only 18 months and I do not plan to spank him.)

Korean American immigrant here.
18months is still very young. I would never spank a child that young, but never say never. It was never a go to punishment for us. DH is from Europe, and he had no problem with open handed spanking on the bottom for our kids at times. Kids were around aged 4 or 5 to 8. Most of the time, it was done out of frustration when everything else we tried didn't work. Looking back, I regret some of it, but not all. Our kids are older now, and they don't have much behavioral issues, nor are they violent. Good students, and pretty good kids over all.

I was abused as a child -- face slaps, and more. There is definitely a difference between spanking and that kind of abuse. People who are comparing spanking on the bottom fully clothed to abuse are trivializing real abuse.

Good thing I didn't, eh? I said I don't *plan* to spank him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you need to dress it up in a cutesy euphemism, "spanking"? Why do you need to do it on/near an erogenous zone? We all know why. You're acting out deep psychosexual pathologies from your own childhoods. And to the "fragile white people" poster - yeah, black children have GREAT behavioral outcomes.

...

You're projecting. Get help.

Justify it all you like, perv. My parents didn't hit me. Sounds like yours did.

[Anonymous]

This thread is so wild. Families are different, kids are different, and different things will work for individual kids. Whatever works to guide a child into behaving well, learning the lessons their parents and other elders seek to teach them, and treating authority figures with respect for both the child's sake and that of the superior is fine. I really don't understand all the arguing. For those calling spanking abusive, a majority of the American public seems to disagree as do laws in most jurisdictions. Abuse has a meaning -- such as that which was experienced by the PP who was hit with implements such as a belt and yard stick -- let's not dilute the idea of child abuse by equating all spankings to that. However, a lot of the parents on this thread who spank have been ridiculous as well. Name-calling isn't okay from children and is just sad from adults. Furthermore, there's no need to claim or imply that choosing not to spank must mean another poster is raising bratty kids. Most parents will find what works for them and go with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mother spanked us as well - it taught me not to confide in her although I loved her. Even as an adult, I still keep things from her.

Spanking makes sneaky children.

Reality is any punishment can make kids sneaky. We don't spank. I hated my parents for it too but there is also a difference between a few swats on the behind and a long, drawn out/painful spanking and that's where no one is really making a distinction. Soap or hot sauce is very abusive. A swat - not the best parent moment but it will not cause lasting harm. Beating your child, will clearly harm.

I’m not pro-spanking but I have swatted my children a few times (I would estimate less than 5 times total, kids are 8 & 11). Always when there was some form of physical behavior issue. I remember once when I was nursing my new born, my 2 1/2 year old kept jumping on me and wouldn’t stop after being told it was dangerous. I swatted his butt to get the point across that I was very serious and his behavior was dangerous. I felt horrible but I was honestly afraid he was going to hurt the baby the way he jumping on me while I nursed.