Differences in gender roles

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you marry someone who doesn’t want you to succeed to your fullest?
For you to be your best self?
He’s a non confident shit move on.

That is the issue. Some people don't see climbing the corporate ladder as a measure of success. No one's tombstone reads "Larlo was the best CFO" and the odds of any one of your coworkers showing up at your funeral 25 years later is slim to none. Work is a mean's to an end not a measurement of importance or self worth.

I just recently went to the funeral of a well-known trauma surgeon in my area, and I can assure you that many of his colleagues and patients were there, and his success as a surgeon was a huge part of his life.

I went to another funeral last year of a man who started a charity providing food, laundry, hairdressing, toys, etc. to people in the community who couldn’t afford it. He had a history of addiction and employed only recovering addicts. MANY of his co-workers and people he employed came to the funeral, and there was a huge emphasis on his work.

Of course your work matters!

Weird flex how you only named deceased MALES who were well-known and successful in their occupations???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you marry someone who doesn’t want you to succeed to your fullest?
For you to be your best self?
He’s a non confident shit move on.

That is the issue. Some people don't see climbing the corporate ladder as a measure of success. No one's tombstone reads "Larlo was the best CFO" and the odds of any one of your coworkers showing up at your funeral 25 years later is slim to none. Work is a mean's to an end not a measurement of importance or self worth.

I just recently went to the funeral of a well-known trauma surgeon in my area, and I can assure you that many of his colleagues and patients were there, and his success as a surgeon was a huge part of his life.

I went to another funeral last year of a man who started a charity providing food, laundry, hairdressing, toys, etc. to people in the community who couldn’t afford it. He had a history of addiction and employed only recovering addicts. MANY of his co-workers and people he employed came to the funeral, and there was a huge emphasis on his work.

Of course your work matters!

Both of those people sound amazing and have nothing to do with your average person climbing the corporate ladder. You are not making any contribution to society, even if you make it to C suite or even CEO. You could be fired or quit tomorrow and can be replaced with someone just as good or better than you.

wtf is wrong with you? Of COURSE women in the workplace are contributing to society, how dare you say otherwise. Not everyone thinks all women should be barefoot and pregnant. I sincerely hope you don’t have children to harm with these sexist views.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you marry someone who doesn’t want you to succeed to your fullest?
For you to be your best self?
He’s a non confident shit move on.

That is the issue. Some people don't see climbing the corporate ladder as a measure of success. No one's tombstone reads "Larlo was the best CFO" and the odds of any one of your coworkers showing up at your funeral 25 years later is slim to none. Work is a mean's to an end not a measurement of importance or self worth.

I just recently went to the funeral of a well-known trauma surgeon in my area, and I can assure you that many of his colleagues and patients were there, and his success as a surgeon was a huge part of his life.

I went to another funeral last year of a man who started a charity providing food, laundry, hairdressing, toys, etc. to people in the community who couldn’t afford it. He had a history of addiction and employed only recovering addicts. MANY of his co-workers and people he employed came to the funeral, and there was a huge emphasis on his work.

Of course your work matters!

Weird flex how you only named deceased MALES who were well-known and successful in their occupations???

I don’t know. I’m 40 years old. I don’t go to a lot of funerals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you marry someone who doesn’t want you to succeed to your fullest?
For you to be your best self?
He’s a non confident shit move on.

That is the issue. Some people don't see climbing the corporate ladder as a measure of success. No one's tombstone reads "Larlo was the best CFO" and the odds of any one of your coworkers showing up at your funeral 25 years later is slim to none. Work is a mean's to an end not a measurement of importance or self worth.

I just recently went to the funeral of a well-known trauma surgeon in my area, and I can assure you that many of his colleagues and patients were there, and his success as a surgeon was a huge part of his life.

I went to another funeral last year of a man who started a charity providing food, laundry, hairdressing, toys, etc. to people in the community who couldn’t afford it. He had a history of addiction and employed only recovering addicts. MANY of his co-workers and people he employed came to the funeral, and there was a huge emphasis on his work.

Of course your work matters!

Both of those people sound amazing and have nothing to do with your average person climbing the corporate ladder. You are not making any contribution to society, even if you make it to C suite or even CEO. You could be fired or quit tomorrow and can be replaced with someone just as good or better than you.

Sure. So maybe OP should continue with her ambitions instead of just being average and mommy-tracking. Right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you marry someone who doesn’t want you to succeed to your fullest?
For you to be your best self?
He’s a non confident shit move on.

That is the issue. Some people don't see climbing the corporate ladder as a measure of success. No one's tombstone reads "Larlo was the best CFO" and the odds of any one of your coworkers showing up at your funeral 25 years later is slim to none. Work is a mean's to an end not a measurement of importance or self worth.

I just recently went to the funeral of a well-known trauma surgeon in my area, and I can assure you that many of his colleagues and patients were there, and his success as a surgeon was a huge part of his life.

I went to another funeral last year of a man who started a charity providing food, laundry, hairdressing, toys, etc. to people in the community who couldn’t afford it. He had a history of addiction and employed only recovering addicts. MANY of his co-workers and people he employed came to the funeral, and there was a huge emphasis on his work.

Of course your work matters!

Both of those people sound amazing and have nothing to do with your average person climbing the corporate ladder. You are not making any contribution to society, even if you make it to C suite or even CEO. You could be fired or quit tomorrow and can be replaced with someone just as good or better than you.

wtf is wrong with you? Of COURSE women in the workplace are contributing to society, how dare you say otherwise. Not everyone thinks all women should be barefoot and pregnant. I sincerely hope you don’t have children to harm with these sexist views.

You are a sicko and a misandrist. It has nothing to do with sex.

[Anonymous]

I think the point is most jobs are just made up. They don't actually matter. It doesn't matter how well you do them, because it's meaningless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think the point is most jobs are just made up. They don't actually matter. It doesn't matter how well you do them, because it's meaningless.

Amen! More than half of these jobs are meaningless.

[Anonymous]

If you make enough money most men would be okay with a non-traditional marriage.

[Anonymous]

Problem rises when you don't earn enough to contribute to raise family's lifestyle and hire help to delegate all traditional duties.

If you are Priyanka Chopra and can hire people to do everything a traditional wives does, including surrogates, nannies, cooks, cleaners, drivers, managers and whatnot, even pretty men with promise rings can be non-traditional.

[Anonymous]

What's frustrating is that society asks women to justify their existence in a way men never are. This applies to both women who stay at home and women who work.

I've run into this attitude especially with older relatives. People just kind of assume my husband is the family breadwinner and sort of challenge me working, even though I actually out earn my husband. The cost of daycare is compared to my income, not his. I'm asked if my job is important, not him.

And I think this applies to SAHM too. They're asked what they do all day and judged if any household labor is outsourced. My own mom had a huge hurdle when we decided to get a house cleaning service, even with four kids and my mom dealing with some health issues after my youngest sibling was born because it was seen as her "job". Fortunately my Dad is also a good guy, never dumped everything on my mom and stood up when my older aunt would be judge.

I'm also glad I married someone who's my ally on this, who jumps in to tell his Dad the facts before I can.

[Anonymous]

I think people judge everyone but more so if woman isn't earning enough to justify spending time, energy and care elsewhere than her family.

However, with poor economy, inflation and fancy lifestyle obsession, for 80% of families its just not possible to manage on one income. Also with societal mind-shift, women have to have a job, even if its not adding anything to their own or family's lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people judge everyone but more so if woman isn't earning enough to justify spending time, energy and care elsewhere than her family.

However, with poor economy, inflation and fancy lifestyle obsession, for 80% of families its just not possible to manage on one income. Also with societal mind-shift, women have to have a job, even if its not adding anything to their own or family's lives.

WTF is wrong with you?

Stop judging people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's frustrating is that society asks women to justify their existence in a way men never are. This applies to both women who stay at home and women who work.

I've run into this attitude especially with older relatives. People just kind of assume my husband is the family breadwinner and sort of challenge me working, even though I actually out earn my husband. The cost of daycare is compared to my income, not his. I'm asked if my job is important, not him.

And I think this applies to SAHM too. They're asked what they do all day and judged if any household labor is outsourced. My own mom had a huge hurdle when we decided to get a house cleaning service, even with four kids and my mom dealing with some health issues after my youngest sibling was born because it was seen as her "job". Fortunately my Dad is also a good guy, never dumped everything on my mom and stood up when my older aunt would be judge.

I'm also glad I married someone who's my ally on this, who jumps in to tell his Dad the facts before I can.

yeah ok if you want to discuss gender roles with older traditionalists you're going to get what you get there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's frustrating is that society asks women to justify their existence in a way men never are. This applies to both women who stay at home and women who work.

I've run into this attitude especially with older relatives. People just kind of assume my husband is the family breadwinner and sort of challenge me working, even though I actually out earn my husband. The cost of daycare is compared to my income, not his. I'm asked if my job is important, not him.

And I think this applies to SAHM too. They're asked what they do all day and judged if any household labor is outsourced. My own mom had a huge hurdle when we decided to get a house cleaning service, even with four kids and my mom dealing with some health issues after my youngest sibling was born because it was seen as her "job". Fortunately my Dad is also a good guy, never dumped everything on my mom and stood up when my older aunt would be judge.

I'm also glad I married someone who's my ally on this, who jumps in to tell his Dad the facts before I can.

yeah ok if you want to discuss gender roles with older traditionalists you're going to get what you get there

I mean it's not like we raise the subject. People like my old traditionalist aunt will bring it on themselves to try to lecture you about things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You cannot be a good mother and have a career. Sounds like you both have different priorities and it will never work.

Ah ha ha ha