How much financial help are you really giving your adult children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't read the thread, but wanted to post this:

NONE.

My children are independent of me, and they are doing well. If they depended on me for money, they would not be doing well. I have plenty of money to share with them when I'm dead. In the meantime, they get zip from me while they build their own lives.

Shame on you parents who fund your adult children, who will be dependent and entitled forever.

Ok. I'll bite. (Another NP who has not read the tread.)

My kids are doing well. One of them has a job, another one is in grad school. We do not support them financially in the sense that they don't have a monthly allowance. That being said, I want to see my children use their inheritance. It's purely selfish of me. So, we helped our son with a downpayment on his condo. He pays the mortgage and is responsible for maintenance, etc. But this will help him build wealth, rather than helping build his landlord's wealth. We pay for them to join us on our family vacation once a year. Again, I am doing for myself in the first instance. Do they depend on us? No. But do we help? Sure. Why not. I don't need to see my children struggle the way I did. They are good kids. They are hard working. And, yes, they are very fortunate.

lol 60k down payment divided by 12 months divided by 5 years of saving = $1,000 ‘allowance” per month. There did the math for you PP. But sure, your kids are ‘doing well independently’’.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't read the thread, but wanted to post this:

NONE.

My children are independent of me, and they are doing well. If they depended on me for money, they would not be doing well. I have plenty of money to share with them when I'm dead. In the meantime, they get zip from me while they build their own lives.

Shame on you parents who fund your adult children, who will be dependent and entitled forever.

Ok. I'll bite. (Another NP who has not read the tread.)

My kids are doing well. One of them has a job, another one is in grad school. We do not support them financially in the sense that they don't have a monthly allowance. That being said, I want to see my children use their inheritance. It's purely selfish of me. So, we helped our son with a downpayment on his condo. He pays the mortgage and is responsible for maintenance, etc. But this will help him build wealth, rather than helping build his landlord's wealth. We pay for them to join us on our family vacation once a year. Again, I am doing for myself in the first instance. Do they depend on us? No. But do we help? Sure. Why not. I don't need to see my children struggle the way I did. They are good kids. They are hard working. And, yes, they are very fortunate.

lol 60k down payment divided by 12 months divided by 5 years of saving = $1,000 ‘allowance” per month. There did the math for you PP. But sure, your kids are ‘doing well independently’’.

You are missing the point. My son’s housing costs would be the same if he rented an apartment. But with my help he is investing into his future, rather than his landlord’s future. But you do you.

[Anonymous]

Setting them on right bath way before college.
They have my credit rating, will have no loans, and have an investment account before teens. We are doing it on my very low income, but we started early.
DCs are not spenders. That's a huge win already. I don't see why they wouldn't have ca $2k left over monthly when they start working. We are going to invest it all as we are doing now.
I remember having $600 left over the very first month I started working which was September 1996.
I wish investing had been as easy and cheap as it is now.
I will watch the grand-kids for free if needed. I have nothing else to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't read the thread, but wanted to post this:

NONE.

My children are independent of me, and they are doing well. If they depended on me for money, they would not be doing well. I have plenty of money to share with them when I'm dead. In the meantime, they get zip from me while they build their own lives.

Shame on you parents who fund your adult children, who will be dependent and entitled forever.

Ok. I'll bite. (Another NP who has not read the tread.)

My kids are doing well. One of them has a job, another one is in grad school. We do not support them financially in the sense that they don't have a monthly allowance. That being said, I want to see my children use their inheritance. It's purely selfish of me. So, we helped our son with a downpayment on his condo. He pays the mortgage and is responsible for maintenance, etc. But this will help him build wealth, rather than helping build his landlord's wealth. We pay for them to join us on our family vacation once a year. Again, I am doing for myself in the first instance. Do they depend on us? No. But do we help? Sure. Why not. I don't need to see my children struggle the way I did. They are good kids. They are hard working. And, yes, they are very fortunate.

lol 60k down payment divided by 12 months divided by 5 years of saving = $1,000 ‘allowance” per month. There did the math for you PP. But sure, your kids are ‘doing well independently’’.

You are missing the point. My son’s housing costs would be the same if he rented an apartment. But with my help he is investing into his future, rather than his landlord’s future. But you do you.

You are missing MY point. You can claim he doesn’t depend on you. But actually he did. Bc he did to come up with the down payment on his own. I’m not begrudging your generosity I’m doing the same for mine, but at least be intellectually honest about it.

[Anonymous]

Other than gifting them old cars we didn't support them after college until they were married with successful careers. Then we hit an age when estate planning became an issue and gifting them every year was a good thing to do. We've set up irrevocable trusts for them plus we have provided bridge loans on real estate when needed. We've set up 529's for each of their children which should cover 50% of their college expenses. They are all doing very well on their own and they want to succeed on their own so we are a very nice safe net if needed.