Yes. Your Kid is overscheduled.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's weird to have a house rule that your kids must play one organized sport per season to ensure they get exercise. Do they eat lard by the gallon and not move at all unless there is a ball to chase? Maybe it's because I have boys who are super wild and active naturally.

Super wild generally means no parenting and you are checked out and don't care. At best you will keep them alive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Yep, those are the kids who get in trouble. Just hanging around with nothing to do at those ages leaves lots of time for drugs and sex. I saw it among other kids growing up, saw it among kids in the same grade with my kids over the years.

Idle hands and all that.

A full academic course load at a pressure cooker school is a whole activity unto itself. You must send your kids to weak schools. Nobody at my kid's school has time for 3 sports, basketweaving, and barbershop quartet practice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Yep, those are the kids who get in trouble. Just hanging around with nothing to do at those ages leaves lots of time for drugs and sex. I saw it among other kids growing up, saw it among kids in the same grade with my kids over the years.

Idle hands and all that.

A full academic course load at a pressure cooker school is a whole activity unto itself. You must send your kids to weak schools. Nobody at my kid's school has time for 3 sports, basketweaving, and barbershop quartet practice.

Your expensive private isn't any different than a public high school where kids do pre-algebra in 9th and take multiple AP classes. And, yet, we all seem to make it work. Its all about priorities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Yep, those are the kids who get in trouble. Just hanging around with nothing to do at those ages leaves lots of time for drugs and sex. I saw it among other kids growing up, saw it among kids in the same grade with my kids over the years.

Idle hands and all that.

A full academic course load at a pressure cooker school is a whole activity unto itself. You must send your kids to weak schools. Nobody at my kid's school has time for 3 sports, basketweaving, and barbershop quartet practice.

Sorry your kid isn't smart enough to finish their homework and you are ruining their life. Able people balance academics, athletics and arts. You know that pressure cooker isn't a good thing for the ones inside right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Yep, those are the kids who get in trouble. Just hanging around with nothing to do at those ages leaves lots of time for drugs and sex. I saw it among other kids growing up, saw it among kids in the same grade with my kids over the years.

Idle hands and all that.

A full academic course load at a pressure cooker school is a whole activity unto itself. You must send your kids to weak schools. Nobody at my kid's school has time for 3 sports, basketweaving, and barbershop quartet practice.

Your expensive private isn't any different than a public high school where kids do pre-algebra in 9th and take multiple AP classes. And, yet, we all seem to make it work. It's all about priorities.

Being a 3-sport athlete has taught my kid time management. And his greatest motivation to get good grades in school is to have more options to play a sport in college. It's not for everyone, and it's not even how I was raised. He also plays an instrument in honors program that he is obsessed with. He doesn't need more time on Snapchat or YouTube, or even time to “hang out” with friends as that typically means trouble in teenage years

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Regardless of the activities, sport or non sport, kods shouldn't be overscheduled. What's so wrong with free play?

They won't get into an Ivy.

And your kid won’t even make the high school sports team

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Rant.

I'm sick of going out with Mom friends who are complaining about how busy their kids are. GUESS WHAT? You can control that. And I'm annoyed about your kid having to leave games or missing games because they have another sport that they choose over my kid's team. Sucks to forfeit because half the team chose soccer over baseball. GUESS WHAT? You can control that too.

And whatever happened to being bored? Lazing around with a book? Playdates? Riding your bike around the neighborhood to see who is around? I can't even schedule a d@mn playdate because your kid has one of their 3 sports or private lessons for one of those 3 sports every waking moment of the weekend.

You're the freaking parent. Tell your kid they need to pick and can't do every sport and activity under the sun. PROBLEM SOLVED.

And didn't we all agree that the one part of COVID that we liked was the slower pace and more time with family? Why are we overcorrecting now?

Can't say this to their faces, so I'm saying it here.

Totally with you OP. I have a friend who is constantly complaining about how much driving around she does for her three kids' sports, including soccer for a three year old who already goes to daycare. Wellllll, you signed up for it, and sports for a non-school aged kid are not necessary.

X10000 Same. The parents both work from home 100%, and have one kid at home. You signed up for this!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Not for all kids, our neighborhood friends and my sibling had a blast playing throughout middle school. And why not, we were kids having fun. Free play is very important for middle schoolers, I've even read articles on it. I'm not sure why or when ppl deemed them too old to do this. It was the norm for us. I don't know why ppl think they aren't deserving of free play.

Why do you think athletes aren’t getting both?

Also, our day was great - I had free play too and then just walked right on to a JV sport as a freshman having barely played. Those days are over for most schools with most sports. If you don’t have some training, you aren’t making a high school team. I absolutely loved being a high school athlete and my kids enjoy it too, so I am glad we put in the prep work to make that happen in elementary and middle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Free play is all fun and games until middle school. Then the kids with no activities have nothing to do and it’s downhill from there.

Yep, those are the kids who get in trouble. Just hanging around with nothing to do at those ages leaves lots of time for drugs and sex. I saw it among other kids growing up, saw it among kids in the same grade with my kids over the years.

Idle hands and all that.

A full academic course load at a pressure cooker school is a whole activity unto itself. You must send your kids to weak schools. Nobody at my kid's school has time for 3 sports, basketweaving, and barbershop quartet practice.

Most private schools of a high caliber are requiring a sport unless you substitute that block of time in the schedule with something like robotics or drama. It’s an expectation, not an extra, and it’s geared towards college placement. They aren’t producing kids who are JUST excellent students.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I partly blame the culture around here -it’s hard to do any sports in a chill way regardless of age. If your kid wants to swim, they are either only swimming in the summer or they are swimming at least 3 days a week year round. And if you don’t start early enough you are “behind” so everyone wants to let their kids try a couple things out.

My oldest asks to do activities because that’s where her friends are. They aren’t available if she goes and knocks on their door. We allow less than a lot of families (my daughter is really only doing dance and Girl Scouts my son is only doing soccer and we will see if it bites us in the a*s later). It’s a balance

Why not let them do the activities they want to?

PP you are responding to and I do let them do some of the activities that they want to do. But they have to pick because I’m not willing to spend all evening every evening driving both kids around and dragging the little guys because he can’t stay home alone. I also see worse behavior when they are too busy. So one of my kids is mildly interested in swimming but I’m not willing to add 3 nights a week or something. But they get to do what they are most excited about.

And they us find for your family. But don’t expect my family to be home all the time because you need a play date.

I don’t expect anything! My kids are fine, and if they would prefer to have a few more playdates it’s hardly the end of the world. But when I’m picking my daughter up and her friend is begging to come over with my DD and one of the other girls who is walking home with us but can’t because she (the friend) has swim and then basketball I feel a little sad. I think she likes those things! But knows that she’s missing out. Honestly the only reason we continue to keep her in Girl Scouts is it’s the only social thing that some kids do and that is when she sees those girls.

Maybe the parents feel sad for your kids that they don't get the same opportunities to learn new skills. I feel sad for kids like yours who se parents are too lazy to do anything extra for them. Mine would much rather do sports or music than hang out at your house.

How rude! FYI research shows free play is far superior to organized activities. Even pickup sports are superior to organized sports. Too bad your child won’t be able to function without someone directing them all the time or telling them what to do while my kids will learn not just the sport but also how to deal with friends/neighbors/teammates etc. You can think parents who let their kids enjoy their childhood without pushing them into scheduled activities are lazy but we value something thats far more important than playing on 3-4 different teams each season.

NP but where do you live with so many pickup sports? I would love that, but in my town everyone is… super scheduled.

There are many kids in our neighborhood. Not everyone is available every day but someone is there to hang out and play. My kids will play pickle ball, basketball, football, hockey, kickball, soccer etc with other kids in the neighborhood. So they are very active despite not being in organized sports every day. Despite the opinion here, kids learn a lot about handing disputes, planning, organizing, implementing and leadership through free play and pickup sports. I am not saying that kids shouldn’t be in any activity and my kids do not sit and play video games either. But there needs to be a balance. Thankfully, where we live only a couple of kids are over scheduled so there are always some kids who can play. Childhood is short, and its not a race to a college. And as someone pointed out that my kids won’t get into an ivy. That is fine. We are not planning their lives around getting into top 20.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nooe is around for playdates where we are
I can either take off work early and do childcare or take my kid to a 4:30 karate class that she loves. I do think we have too many activities right now and will scale back when one phases out and its warmer and we can do playground evenings instead. Early ES is such a great time to try new things and there isnt too much homework is any and there is so much energy these kids have.

Yes nobody is free for play dates. They are in aftercare, or else being shuttled around to math or sports. I had my kid take a semester off aftercare and had light activity schedule and there was nobody around.

Some of us have jobs. Hence, aftercare.

+1 and the best thing about aftercare is it's one big free play playdate.

But I do see OP on the overscheduling. No kid needs to be in three sports at once and out every evening any most of the weekend for all these activities. And if you are doing it because they'll otherwise have some free evenings and will be bored then your kid probably needs some space to learn to deal with boredom.

[Anonymous]

We should have been posting where we’re are fron. Differences could be regional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nooe is around for playdates where we are
I can either take off work early and do childcare or take my kid to a 4:30 karate class that she loves. I do think we have too many activities right now and will scale back when one phases out and its warmer and we can do playground evenings instead. Early ES is such a great time to try new things and there isnt too much homework is any and there is so much energy these kids have.

Yes nobody is free for play dates. They are in aftercare, or else being shuttled around to math or sports. I had my kid take a semester off aftercare and had light activity schedule and there was nobody around.

Some of us have jobs. Hence, aftercare.

+1 and the best thing about aftercare is it's one big free play playdate.

But I do see OP on the overscheduling. No kid needs to be in three sports at once and out every evening any most of the weekend for all these activities. And if you are doing it because they'll otherwise have some free evenings and will be bored then your kid probably needs some space to learn to deal with boredom.

The problem is that lots of kids have access to tablets starting during the preschool years. Parents need to be able to say no when kids are bored and want screens, but parents are also busy and tired and don’t want a fight.

[Anonymous]

My kids have activities most days (they are both in multiple sports) but they always have at least an hour after school where they are thrown into the backyard to make their own fun. They go to 2 weeks sleepover camp. I don’t limit or regulate tv but they do a ton of downtime and usually opt to play outside and read about 30 min before bed. I think it works for our family and our kids are happy, social kids who do well with others. We don’t have a ton of time for play dates but as others pointed out they see friends frequently through school, activities and birthdays

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nooe is around for playdates where we are
I can either take off work early and do childcare or take my kid to a 4:30 karate class that she loves. I do think we have too many activities right now and will scale back when one phases out and its warmer and we can do playground evenings instead. Early ES is such a great time to try new things and there isnt too much homework is any and there is so much energy these kids have.

Yes nobody is free for play dates. They are in aftercare, or else being shuttled around to math or sports. I had my kid take a semester off aftercare and had light activity schedule and there was nobody around.

Some of us have jobs. Hence, aftercare.

+1 and the best thing about aftercare is it's one big free play playdate.

But I do see OP on the overscheduling. No kid needs to be in three sports at once and out every evening any most of the weekend for all these activities. And if you are doing it because they'll otherwise have some free evenings and will be bored then your kid probably needs some space to learn to deal with boredom.

Maybe the kids enjoy it….ever think of that?