Boys are not all right

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are the above PPs parents of girls only? I have a boy who is and will be well above average due to luck and privilege. But I can’t imagine being so cavalier and dismissive of other boy parents.

Male privilege was what propelled most white boys ahead. Now that they can’t count on it to cover up Larlo’s shortcomings, DCUM is in a tizzy.

Wahhh keep crying. The world isn't fair, sorry.

Tell you what, if you hate it so much then just leave and start your own country dominated by the patriarchy. But first you'll need competent leadership, money and an army to take over land to start your own country to start all over.

The most pathetic part about it all is the inability of women to start their own businesses and do entrepreneurship even with all of the major advantages given to them for handicaps. Women investors can fund women entrepreneurs, yet for some reason they don't.

Keep crying about the world being unfair. It's unfair for a lot people outside of your identity group too. Tough.

A funny comment in a thread about how boys are too dumb to meet fourth grade literacy standards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Maybe boys need to step up their game?

-mom of boy and girl, with boy in college and doing well.

This is it. Boys have been handed things for so long, that now that they have to *work* for it, people think they're suffering. What's that saying? When you're accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.

You're almost there. Actually, parents need to parent better, and require boys to step up their game. So that by the time they grow into men, they are ready to be better than mediocre.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
— despite all the programs encouraging women in stem, there is still a huge gap. I have a teen daughter who has always liked math/compuyers. She has done computer science camp since age 7. This is a camp that has a particular program to encourage girls. And yet by age 12, she was basically the only girl left in the programming stuff. I count the heads in her AP comp sci classes, and it’s mostly boys. There is still a lot of stigma among tween/teen girls for the tech fields (although I think no stigma for the sciences that are perceived as more “helping” sciences like Bio or Enviro).

Yes, you can't force girls to study STEM if they are not interested. Just like not many boys enter teaching or nursing (nursing in particular pays quite well). But we see no efforts to get more boys into those fields, and plenty of effort to get girls into certain fields. Boys are pretty much ignored.

Actually boys are really going into nursing now that it’s a pretty well compensated field. But my point isn’t to force girls into Stem. It’s that there are still a lot of social pressures pushing girls away from stem. It’s still considered geeky which is a worse condemnation for a teen girl than a teen boy. The internet is really unwelcoming to girls—see all the online harassment of women in gaming. And the majority of games are still made by and for males which really makes the teen tech world very male dominated. There’s a lot of funneling that pulls girls out of tech and moms are part of the problem. None of the UMC feminist moms I know are really encouraging their girls to get involved in CS or engineering, except the Asian ones. Why don’t UMC women of other races care about this? I don’t know. They are all buying legos and looking for coding camps for their boys. It drives me nuts. I was a girl mathlete in the 80s….i did not think it would still be like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
— despite all the programs encouraging women in stem, there is still a huge gap. I have a teen daughter who has always liked math/compuyers. She has done computer science camp since age 7. This is a camp that has a particular program to encourage girls. And yet by age 12, she was basically the only girl left in the programming stuff. I count the heads in her AP comp sci classes, and it’s mostly boys. There is still a lot of stigma among tween/teen girls for the tech fields (although I think no stigma for the sciences that are perceived as more “helping” sciences like Bio or Enviro).

Yes, you can't force girls to study STEM if they are not interested. Just like not many boys enter teaching or nursing (nursing in particular pays quite well). But we see no efforts to get more boys into those fields, and plenty of effort to get girls into certain fields. Boys are pretty much ignored.

Actually boys are really going into nursing now that it’s a pretty well compensated field. But my point isn’t to force girls into Stem. It’s that there are still a lot of social pressures pushing girls away from stem. It’s still considered geeky which is a worse condemnation for a teen girl than a teen boy. The internet is really unwelcoming to girls—see all the online harassment of women in gaming. And the majority of games are still made by and for males which really makes the teen tech world very male dominated. There’s a lot of funneling that pulls girls out of tech and moms are part of the problem. None of the UMC feminist moms I know are really encouraging their girls to get involved in CS or engineering, except the Asian ones. Why don’t UMC women of other races care about this? I don’t know. They are all buying legos and looking for coding camps for their boys. It drives me nuts. I was a girl mathlete in the 80s….i did not think it would still be like this.

It’s always a woman’s fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
— despite all the programs encouraging women in stem, there is still a huge gap. I have a teen daughter who has always liked math/compuyers. She has done computer science camp since age 7. This is a camp that has a particular program to encourage girls. And yet by age 12, she was basically the only girl left in the programming stuff. I count the heads in her AP comp sci classes, and it’s mostly boys. There is still a lot of stigma among tween/teen girls for the tech fields (although I think no stigma for the sciences that are perceived as more “helping” sciences like Bio or Enviro).

Yes, you can't force girls to study STEM if they are not interested. Just like not many boys enter teaching or nursing (nursing in particular pays quite well). But we see no efforts to get more boys into those fields, and plenty of effort to get girls into certain fields. Boys are pretty much ignored.

Actually boys are really going into nursing now that it’s a pretty well compensated field. But my point isn’t to force girls into Stem. It’s that there are still a lot of social pressures pushing girls away from stem. It’s still considered geeky which is a worse condemnation for a teen girl than a teen boy. The internet is really unwelcoming to girls—see all the online harassment of women in gaming. And the majority of games are still made by and for males which really makes the teen tech world very male dominated. There’s a lot of funneling that pulls girls out of tech and moms are part of the problem. None of the UMC feminist moms I know are really encouraging their girls to get involved in CS or engineering, except the Asian ones. Why don’t UMC women of other races care about this? I don’t know. They are all buying legos and looking for coding camps for their boys. It drives me nuts. I was a girl mathlete in the 80s….i did not think it would still be like this.

It's ironic that you blame the mom on a thread about boys not being "all right" when every single boy has a father out there.

Perhaps the boys would be "all right" if the fathers stepped up and taught the boys to step up.

But, I guess the fathers can't do that because the women aren't letting the men step up.

Coming full circle: it's always the woman's fault.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Actually boys are really going into nursing now that it’s a pretty well compensated field.

Percentage of men in nursing went from 9.01% in 2011 to 11.21 in 2022. That's hardly an increase over a decade.

https://nursejournal.org/articles/male-nurse-statistics/

Women in STEM are about 25% by comparison.

[Anonymous]

It's true the toxic men comes from Harvard. They are mostly rich brat kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Diehard feminist and mother of 3 teen/college boys.

I do think they struggle more with identity and role models now. It is especially more fraught with the MAGA/Trump influences on young men.

I think that is why the Kelces are getting so much positive attention and I love it.

Success is not a zero-sum game when it comes to gender. I think many young women are being taught that it is.

Agree.

In 2024, the feminism girls and young women are taught is different.

Feminism in 2024 is not about equality. Feminism in 2024 is about female supremacy.

Women certainly couldn't do a worse job than men at running the world.

Argentina would beg to differ. 1000% inflation? Lol.

Inflation started 30 years ago dumbo

[Anonymous]

It's true the US interferes in other countries politics. US just wants power and make money.
Now we have enemies thanks to bush, and the inflation it's hitting us hard

Looks like the economy is getting better, it was a big mess after the war of Afghanistan that Republican Bush started

[Anonymous]

Men started wars.

I think God wants Women to rule

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe it's parenting and parents and schools dumbing down boys, insisting on holding them back, etc. Its not surprising at all.

The parents of the boys I know are more often than not always making excuses for everything they do that could be corrected or worked on. It’s pathetic and so are they as parents, and so are their not-great students, not-great attitudes, not-great sons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DS was behind in reading until 3rd grade. Now in HS, he is ranked within the top 5 of his class and got a 5 on the History AP exam.

The problem with our society is the emphasis on sports with boys. While my son participates in sports, we never watch games at home and I’m not sure if anyone in our family could tell you what sport the Wizards play. We DGAF about sports! My DS is nationally ranked in his sport but we would be disappointed if he played in college.

You're so full of sh!t it's actually comical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Actually boys are really going into nursing now that it’s a pretty well compensated field.

Percentage of men in nursing went from 9.01% in 2011 to 11.21 in 2022. That's hardly an increase over a decade.

https://nursejournal.org/articles/male-nurse-statistics/

Women in STEM are about 25% by comparison.

Look at the ratio for Nurse anesthetists.

And IT program managers

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP is correct.

Society in the US, particularly among the college-educated, has turned toxic for boys.

Men have a lower rate of participation in the workforce.

Boys are more likely to be diagnosed with ADHD and autism.

Males are more likely than females to drop out of high school, and the ones who do go on to college are less likely than their female peers to graduate.

They are barraged with constant and conflicting messages about what it means to be a man, and the consequences of failing to live up to other people's ideas about modern masculinity can be severe.

And all of this is difficult to talk about because the simultaneous cultural crescendo of misogyny and the war on women's rights (particularly on social media) is so intense, it has created a zero sum game expectation around our basic humanity.

It has become a no-win scenario to grow up male in America now.

+1
Yes, there was/is a patriarchy but it’s not like the youngest generation of boys are being advantaged by it. But society is trending towards misandry. It’s not even something that people keep on the down-low. There’s a lot of open vitriol aimed at males. Older generations might deserve it, but they’re not the ones being affected by it.

I do see a lot of flame baiting in this thread, and am not trying to add to it but I see a lot of blatant double standards by many feminists. “Equal” means “equal”, it doesn’t mean “give us equal standing and prestige amongst the things dominated/run by males… but also let us keep the perks females have always had”.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe boys just aren't as smart as girls, and that's OK.

This. It's okay. The boys will still find jobs.

And as PP said, get back to me when we have parity in leadership positions across the spectrum.