Was having kids worth the risk it took on your looks?

[Anonymous]

Natalia Vodianova has birthed 5 kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:It's absolutely worth it, and people are absolutely kidding themselves when they say they've aged the same way as childless women. The sleep factor alone is huge.

In the little kid years that’s true but it all catches up in your 50s.

No way. There was a childfree woman at my gym that I thought was 32 yrs old max. Someone told her she would lose her physique after she had kids and to “wait until you also hit menopause.” She responded saying she is 55 and post menopause. Mic drop. I would not have believed it in a million years but is true. Totally shut down that conversation. 😁

It's called the genetic lottery. That woman would probably look fantastic with kids too.

No. You need to take care of yourself to do this. Even with good genetics you can look like crap if you don’t take care of yourself.

Sure, but you don’t get that way without both. It’s just how it is. Some women will take care of themselves and still age poorly. Life is unfair unfortunately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My childless friends look the same as me at 40.

The main thing is to make sure to get rid of the baby weight.

Sure Jan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don't sound like you're cut out for motherhood.
-signed a 45 year old mother of 2 who still looks good

Honestly Anonymous, you sound like a critical tool and did a disservice to the world birthing those kids.
-signed someone with an open mind who reads before responding

OP is backtracking now because PPs have called her out for the immature, vain tool she is. Too late, OP.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:For me, there was no question. I always wanted kids and am happy to have them. I also got lucky and got two awesome kids.

But, seriously, if you are even asking this question, just don't have kids. Your priorities are screwed up. If you were asking about risks to your -health- and the changes that can happen with pregnancy to your health, that would be one thing. But your looks? Nope. Don't have kids. Just do what you do best and focus on yourself.

+1 to all of this. If you are even asking this question, do not have children.

Disagree. It’s okay to be vain and prioritize looks and still have kids.

Assuming you are one of these vain people, did worries about your looks even factor into your *decision-making* about having kids? No one is saying a person who places value on their own appearance cannot be a good parent. But that is not what OP was asking.

OP here. Nowhere did I say it factored into MY decision making process. I asked if it factored into other women's decision making process because I have seen women look aged as much as 10 or 15 yrs older than their ages. I looked like a kid next to them and I'm probably older than them.

How do you know that it was kids that "aged" those particular women? They could have other health issues or stressors in their lives.

You are a sorry person, OP. Stop obsessing over how other people look. Grow some character.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's absolutely worth it, and people are absolutely kidding themselves when they say they've aged the same way as childless women. The sleep factor alone is huge.

In the little kid years that’s true but it all catches up in your 50s.

No way. There was a childfree woman at my gym that I thought was 32 yrs old max. Someone told her she would lose her physique after she had kids and to “wait until you also hit menopause.” She responded saying she is 55 and post menopause. Mic drop. I would not have believed it in a million years but is true. Totally shut down that conversation. 😁

How do you know it’s true?

Because I was there and witnessed the conversation.

Lol, no; how do you know she’s actually 55 and post-menopause?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, OP, you don't sound like you're cut out for motherhood.
-signed a 45 year old mother of 2 who still looks good

Honestly Anonymous, you sound like a critical tool and did a disservice to the world birthing those kids.
-signed someone with an open mind who reads before responding

OP is backtracking now because PPs have called her out for the immature, vain tool she is. Too late, OP.

Anonymous, I see you're being an immature tool now by not responding directly. Critical tools haven't read my post and made assumptions. That's wrong. Feel sorry for your kids having a kid like mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me, there was no question. I always wanted kids and am happy to have them. I also got lucky and got two awesome kids.

But, seriously, if you are even asking this question, just don't have kids. Your priorities are screwed up. If you were asking about risks to your -health- and the changes that can happen with pregnancy to your health, that would be one thing. But your looks? Nope. Don't have kids. Just do what you do best and focus on yourself.

+1 to all of this. If you are even asking this question, do not have children.

Disagree. It’s okay to be vain and prioritize looks and still have kids.

Assuming you are one of these vain people, did worries about your looks even factor into your *decision-making* about having kids? No one is saying a person who places value on their own appearance cannot be a good parent. But that is not what OP was asking.

OP here. Nowhere did I say it factored into MY decision making process. I asked if it factored into other women's decision making process because I have seen women look aged as much as 10 or 15 yrs older than their ages. I looked like a kid next to them and I'm probably older than them.

How do you know that it was kids that "aged" those particular women? They could have other health issues or stressors in their lives.

You are a sorry person, OP. Stop obsessing over how other people look. Grow some character.

Anonymous, health issues and stressors increase with kids. That's well known. Be a frump all you want. But this is the beauty and fashion sub. Sounds like you don't belong here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:For me, there was no question. I always wanted kids and am happy to have them. I also got lucky and got two awesome kids.

But, seriously, if you are even asking this question, just don't have kids. Your priorities are screwed up. If you were asking about risks to your -health- and the changes that can happen with pregnancy to your health, that would be one thing. But your looks? Nope. Don't have kids. Just do what you do best and focus on yourself.

+1 to all of this. If you are even asking this question, do not have children.

Disagree. It’s okay to be vain and prioritize looks and still have kids.

Assuming you are one of these vain people, did worries about your looks even factor into your *decision-making* about having kids? No one is saying a person who places value on their own appearance cannot be a good parent. But that is not what OP was asking.

I didn’t worry, but of course it crossed my mind a few times. I was especially concerned about not losing the baby weight.

[Anonymous]

Are you serious?

I'm guessing you are looking for a reason not to have kids.

Please, if you feel this way, don't have kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's absolutely worth it, and people are absolutely kidding themselves when they say they've aged the same way as childless women. The sleep factor alone is huge.

In the little kid years that’s true but it all catches up in your 50s.

No way. There was a childfree woman at my gym that I thought was 32 yrs old max. Someone told her she would lose her physique after she had kids and to “wait until you also hit menopause.” She responded saying she is 55 and post menopause. Mic drop. I would not have believed it in a million years but is true. Totally shut down that conversation. 😁

How do you know it’s true?

Because I was there and witnessed the conversation.

Lol, no; how do you know she’s actually 55 and post-menopause?

Because that was her verbal response to their comments. She said “well I am 55 yrs old and post menopausal” with a smile. Nothing left to say.

[Anonymous]

100% yes.

I had eating disorders and was obsessed about my body and looks during my 20s. You know what? My abs are a little giggly at the moment, but whatever. I’d actually say having kids helped me get over that disordered eating. No way I want them dealing with what I went through, so we practice healthy eating and positive body image. We’re ALL healthier for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wondering. Lot of women gain a lot of weight they can't lose after a baby. Some I see with gray or white hair immediately after or while pregnant. Melasma and new wrinkles. I'd like kids but wondering if the reason most celebrities use surrogates is because they don't want a baby to wreck their body. A lot of celebs over 30 are using surrogates.

This is hilarious. You know that you are going to age and die either way, right?
You might as well make it a memorable and enjoyable life. 40 seems to be society's expiration date for most women so how will not having kids change that? Hint: it doesn't.

[Anonymous]

OP I'm digressing a bit here but there are things you can do to limit the risk of impacts on your looks. Having only one kid is a big one! Otherwise:

Don't overeat. Plain and simple. I love food but I limit myself to mealtimes, no snacking, and I don't buy junk foods I know I will binge on. If you start out pregnancy overweight you'll set yourself up for failure, so get in shape before trying. Same thing with subsequent pregnancies after the first - lose the baby weight completely before trying again.

Find an exercise activity you really love to do that you will be motivated to continue after having kids. Connect it with either a mandatory part of your daily routine (eg, bike commute) or your "me time".

Counterintuitively, AVOID ab exercises during pregnancy, it can put a lot of pressure on your ab muscles. The "tummy pooch" you see some moms get is diastasis recti, split ab muscles. Everyone gets it a little bit during pregnancy, but you want to avoid activities that make it a lingering change.

Sleep train when baby is old enough, prioritize sleep, don't let bad sleep habits form. Sleep deprivation is not good for appearance.

[Anonymous]

Adding to the above: Conversely, there are some things you just can't control - dumb luck. Stretch marks are one of them. So is loose skin, to some extent.