He used red pill terminology
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Anonymous
Right. I had a robust dating experience because I’m not a dick to others. Maybe work on being a better person if you want a date. Falling down the rabbit hole of misogyny isn’t going to make it any better. |
Anonymous
It’s not a woman’s fault - at all - if she’s not attracted to a guy. Blaming it on women is such an entitled, misogynistic perspective. Take a little personal responsibility for your character flaws. |
Anonymous
Nope, it's not at all inevitable. The dudes who go that direction mostly have themselves to blame for their misery. But, the "red pill" followers aren't as rare as we'd hope. It's not like only guys who are uniquely bad go down that path. And, even if they have themselves to blame for the misery, they cause misery for others as well. Being aware of the dynamic that makes that path seem attractive might help us re-direct some chunk of those guys who would otherwise cause problems. |
Anonymous
I probably am doing that. My apologies. I'm not sure how we do it, but we need to do a better job of letting young boys (probably everyone) know just how confused, oblivious, and generally full of sh*t their peers (and maybe the world generally) are when it comes to love and dating. One especially bad thing - at least when I was an adolescent - was how much guys were encouraged to regard a girlfriend as a reflection of their self-worth. Obviously you were interested in sex at that age. But having a girlfriend was also a source of status among other guys. It was also a blow to your own feeling of self-worth. I don't know if it makes a difference, but I think the negative feelings a young man feels is more a function of insecurity than of entitlement. And, all the while, guys were filling your head with bullshit they picked up from god knows where about what women like. And women were gossiping about which boys were cute and which boys were losers. And, somehow, even though everyone was talking about everyone else; mostly they were wrapped up in their own shit and barely noticed what was going on with most of the other people around them. I'm rambling. But it feels like one goal would be reducing the toxic notion that having sex and landing a pretty girl has anything to do with your status as a man; letting kids know that rejection isn't (or shouldn't be) a personal attack; letting them know that 90% of what they hear from their friends about relationships is unreliable; and reinforcing the idea that the goal of a relationship is not to win prizes but to find someone cool who thinks you're cool too. |
Anonymous
No, this judgemental "blue pill" attitude causes young men much misery. Scott Alexander was a physician with plenty of education and compassion. Young physician residents are broke, with student loans. Scott also lacked height, muscles, and hair. But he tragically believed he needed to become a "better person". No, he just need to learn what women want, and to improve his social skills. It is not the fault of women that they didn't want to date Scott. But it is wrong to say unattractive men deserve their loneliness until they become "better". It reminds me of a Mae West scene, when she removed her fur coat, and the coat-check girl exclaimed "Goodness, what a large diamond!" Mae West replied "Goodness had nothing to do with it!" The Red Pill says that sexual attraction has little relation to virtue. |
Anonymous
While I agree with your first two points, it is not a character flaw that someone is not attracted to someone else. |
Anonymous
You're missing the point. Many of these folks are doing everything they are told to do in order to work on themselves without success. Or, even worse, they get a date where the woman is solely there to get a free meal. It doesn't make someone a misogynist, but it certainly demoralizes them about the dating world. |
Anonymous
who tf is Scott Alexander and why are women responsible for his issues? |
Anonymous
A man (or woman) who believes there is some kind of magic formula to finding love has only themselves to blame. Perhaps the answer is to develop a sense of self rather than blaming “them.” Nobody told you to do anything- if you take dating advice that literally, it’s on you |
Anonymous
No one is entitled to a date no matter how much they work on themselves. |
Anonymous
who? unattractive people don't deserve their loneliness, but lots of these unattractive men become embittered, and then their personality is a bigger turnoff than their looks. IDK it's anecdotal but unattractive single men seem way more bitter and angry than unattractive single women. |
Anonymous
No believe it or not its about the same. Lots of bitter men and women out there and they are not just the unattractive ones. I think there is a big overlap with depression and isolation. |
Anonymous
No woman in the entire world would sit through a meal with someone she's not interested in just because it's free. WTF. |
Anonymous
So he felt entitled to dates because he was a med student? That sense of entitlement is a huge turn off. No one owes him anything. He should drop the entitlement and work on his EQ if he wants better relationships. |
Anonymous
+1 WTF |