Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I'm surprised by the amount of folks who don't get that it's. not. about. you.
I'm a woman. I have a woman's name, I use she/her pronouns, I have never in my life had someone look at me and NOT know that I'm a woman, and pretty much everyone that I interact with professionally knows that I'm a woman.
I don't put my pronouns in my email sig so that folks know what pronouns to use with ME. I put pronouns in my email sig so that the 20-something new hire who would like to be treated with respect and called by the pronouns that they prefer can see the example of a leader in the organization publicly displaying pronouns and feel like it's not weird if they do the same.
I don't require ANYONE else to do it, but when you suggest that all allyship is performative, then you diminish folks who are doing any kind of allyship at all.
I do rather suspect that is the point, and while there's a long way on the scale of "grumpy because I think "they" is inherently plural" to blowing up an electrical substation -- it's still the same scale.
The 20 something new hire has grown up to be an adult in pronoun world and knows they can use whatever pronouns they want. I don’t need to use work emails to set examples about private details of my life that I personally do not wish to define me at work. I don’t put disabilities or sexual orientation or mental health diagnoses in my email signatures either even though I want employees to be comfortable being who they are and asking for accommodations if needed. There are many ways to create an inclusive and welcoming work environment without needing to broadcast information about sex or gender or identity in every email. I want my emails to be communication about the work I am doing, not communication about my gender or gender identity or gender expression or sex.
I actually have a 20-something colleague who did feel very uncomfortable being the only one at our office who announced their pronouns, to the extent they haven't come out to 3/4ths of the team because they don't want to have to make a big deal out of it. I think this is unfortunate, and it would be much healthier thing for us to have a mix of signature styles with the option for pronouns and some leaders using them and some not. Personally, I don't care either way (and know people who are viscerally uncomfortable with both pronouns and no pronouns) so I would go with the option that creates the most diversity (e.g., no pronouns if more people have them; pronouns if less people have them). The assumption that all trans/nonbinary/ambiguously gendered young people are hyperconfident in announcing their gender to the world is a big (and inaccurate) assumption and perhaps you think that because none of the closeted folks around you have felt comfortable enough to let you know.
I am not saying every individual is comfortable but this is their world - their generation and the younger ones are primarliy those using the pronouns. What do you suggest we put in emails so that the lesbian new employee feels comfortable referrring to her girlfriend or the employee with low vision feels comfortable asking for larger print or the new hire with depression feels comfortable with a light therapy lamp at their desk or the new hire with chronic pain feels comfortable taking streching breaks or the new hire who is in menopause feels comfortable needing .... What is your solution to making everyone who has an invisible need for an inclusive accommodation comfortable in the workplace via email signature lines?
I think to make the lesbian comfortable about referring to her girlfriend, when I invite her to bring a +1 to happy hour or the holiday party, I say, "Feel free to bring your partner" or "Spouses and partners and significant others are welcome." If I myself am queer (I am), I make a point of referring to *my* wife when we're doing premeeting chitchat so younger people at our firm know they don't have to pretend.
For disability inclusion, I say we proactively ask people what will make their work environment easier, and make a point of having diverse desk/work setups for senior leadership and tell them what parts of my work day I change to make myself more productive so they know it's okay to ask for these things.
Again, I am *not* advocating that everyone put pronouns in emails or be forced to announce them at the beginning of meetings. That puts an undue burden on lots of people for lots of totally valid reasons. But I do think having space for people who *want* to put pronouns in their email signature is polite and having leadership demonstrate that it's okay to use that space is important. It's also important for leadership to demonstrate that it's okay not to use that space.
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