People keep spelling and pronouncing my name wrong

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can understand people misspelling Anne as Ann but how do they pronounce it wrong?

Annie

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My own mother still spells my married last name wrong and I’ve been married over 25 years. It’s a common and phonetic last name. It does make me feel disrespected.

Your own mother? Yes, you have every right to be annoyed by that!

I can do you one better-- my ex-husband who I was married to for 20+ years and gave 4 children, never pronounced my name right

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a Christina, and I don't mind if someone writes "Cristina", but I will correct them if they use a K, Christine, or shorten it to Chris/Chrissy/Christy.

I've really only had one person who pushed back when I asked her not to call me Chris. She is a Jennifer and said, well I don't mind when people call me Jen. Okay. But Chris is not my name. It was slightly awkward, but she said would try.

I am also a Christina too and sometimes I get emails with Cristina (mainly Spanish speakers), Christine, Christiana......it does bother me a bit, but I let it go....

[Anonymous]

I recently came across a Cèilidh. Had no idea it was pronounced the same as Kaylee/Kayleigh/Kayley.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently came across a Cèilidh. Had no idea it was pronounced the same as Kaylee/Kayleigh/Kayley.

Is it forgivable to not know the correct pronunciation and spelling of that name?

[Anonymous]

LOLOLOL

-Supriya

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I recently came across a Cèilidh. Had no idea it was pronounced the same as Kaylee/Kayleigh/Kayley.

That's not Christy or Laura or Anne or Sara.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOLOLOL

-Supriya

In my experience, people are more cautious about misspelling foreign names.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Literally half of my husband’s family pronounces my daughter’s name incorrectly. She’s 20.

I have two Andreas - one is ANDrea and the other is Ahndrea. It can be hard.

Your daughters have the same name but pronounced differently??

Sorry, wasn't clear. Two friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also have a common white person name with a few alternate spellings, and I could not care less how anyone spells it in an email. My husband is a doctor and can’t spell at all, and I’m sure he botches names all the time. My own parents can’t spell my kids’ *very common* names correctly. It’s just not a big deal.

Looking at the email address and/or signature to see someone's name doesn't require spelling skills.

This. I am a bad speller and I know this so if I am not 100$ sure, I look it up. The e-mails are hilarious because your name is RIGHT THERE!

[Anonymous]

I completely get this, but have had to let it roll because getting upset over it doesn't change a thing!
-- Jeanette/Janet/Jannette/Janette/Jancetta (that was....out of left field but happened a lot in one particular class in college)/Janna... I've had it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I completely get this, but have had to let it roll because getting upset over it doesn't change a thing!
-- Jeanette/Janet/Jannette/Janette/Jancetta (that was....out of left field but happened a lot in one particular class in college)/Janna... I've had it all.

No Yaneth?

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm going to cut right to the chase here and I frankly will skip the 10 pages of posts, so if someone has posted this (and I feel sure they have, or I hope so) sorry, but:

Many posts are totally missing the real and very serious issue here! It's this, in your first post:

I've been struggling for a long time with feeling invisible and suicidal thoughts and just being a woman in my 40's, and this just adds to the depression, like people can't even be bothered to call me by the right name.

Are you getting help for your depression? Have you told anyone about your suicidal thoughts? Suicidal thoughts are reason for immediate intervention and help, and I hope you have already gotten that help. If not, please stop reading and call 800-273-8255, the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. You do NOT have to be right on the verge that second to call and talk to them. They can help guide you to further help for the overall depression.

Maybe you've already come back to post here that you're getting help. If so, great, but if it's not working -- and your original post sounds as if it isn't -- please consider changing therapists and/or other doctors ASAP. I know, that's easy to say and not always easy to do, but if you have an Employee Assistance Program at your job, that's one place to start, as is the list of therapists your insurer has.

You are right to feel frustrated about the name issue. It's wrong and stupid of others. But the fact it looms so large for you is an indication of the bigger picture of depression and feelings of "I don't matter." I'm just leaping ahead here to post this to say, please, please talk to someone in your life today about your feelings and more importantly, talk to a professional ASAP. If you're already doing the latter, call that professional today and say you need to be seen today or tomorrow at the latest. Even if you feel you eventually will change therapists or whatever, call the one you have, if you have one, now. You can do this. You do matter. Other people's carelessness and jerkiness is not due to YOUR being unworthy, OP.

Again, if other posts already went here, sorry to repeat, but I saw the OP just now and felt that the posts I saw just below it were fixating on the name issue and missed the huge red flag you waved. Take care of yourself, OP. Update us. You are in this stranger's thoughts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My own mother still spells my married last name wrong and I’ve been married over 25 years. It’s a common and phonetic last name. It does make me feel disrespected.

Your own mother? Yes, you have every right to be annoyed by that!

I can do you one better-- my ex-husband who I was married to for 20+ years and gave 4 children, never pronounced my name right

Asking seriously: How did you not blow the hell up at him over this at some point? Or did you do that, and it just rolled off him?

I note he's an ex....I'm guessing other issues of disrespect, too, huh? Because the name thing for one's spouse? That's pure disrespect coupled with laziness. Wow.

[Anonymous]

My favorite was the woman named Honour who sent me a very pissy email requesting that I double check autocorrect before hitting send because her name is frequently autocorrected to Honor. (not really her name, but same sort of error) She was correct – autocorrect had lost her U. I felt like a jerk for not catching it because I, too, have a name with a letter that is frequently omitted. Of course, her snippy email had MY name spelled incorrectly. I figured I would take the high road and just let it go, but a few hours later, I received another email asking me to please confirm that I had received her email. Again my name was spelled incorrectly. So I responded nicely, pointing out that errors happen to everyone (even her!) but that I would be sure to double check in the future.

She was not amused. At all.