If you co-sleep with your toddler, what is your bedtime routine?

[Anonymous]

DD (14 months) used to go to bed so easily. I would give her a bath, nurse her on the bed, and that would be that. Now, on most nights, she wants to get off the bed after nursing and go out to the living room to read/play more. Then I try again (and sometimes again and again!) until she goes to sleep. It is getting a bit frustrating for all of us and I'm not sure what to do. I've tried reading to her on the bed but she just doesn't get sleepy that way, and ends up wanting to do the same thing. Suggestions?

[Anonymous]

I don't let DS get out of bed once it is bedtime.

[Anonymous]

You put her in a crib.

[Anonymous]

How do you manage to do that? I've tried to keep her on the bed but she get really upset

[Anonymous]

I'm curious too... we start the night off in the crib normally, but were in a hotel all last week, so had the "wander off the bed to go... somewhere else?" stuff a lot after nursing but before falling asleep. Not sure what my kid was thinking, trying to go play in the dark!

This is one of the logistical things about cosleeping that I wonder about - having the kid sleeping in my bed when I'm not sleeping yet. If he's in his crib and refuses to lay down, I can leave him and let him cry for a few... but how to do this on a bed? We compromised on this with the crib, but I do wonder what others do!

[Anonymous]

Obviously the PPers are not co-sleepers and have no advice that will help you. Check out the foums at mothering.com. - forums are currently down for redesign. Check back soon. There is one specifically for co-sleeping and night-time parenting. They might have some ideas.

Here's what we do at our house. I part-time co-sleep. I nurse my 15mo to sleep. We do bath with 3YO brother. Read books with brother in a dimly lit room, 15 mo usually plays quietly with toys on the floor. By the time books are finished the 15mo usually shows signs of being tired. I play music for the 3Yo and take 15Mo into my bed and nurse him to sleep. There are time he doesn't want to sleep. I keep the lights off and minimize distractions. If he gets up, I keep laying him back down on the bed and softly repeat it's night-night time. Sometimes I sing. If he get's too upset, I bounce him on the yoga ball and that usually does it. Once big brother falls alseep, I move little bro to his crib. When he wakes up, I bring him into my bed and nurse him and he stays in bed with me the rest of the night. If I get truly desperate, I put him in the car and drive him around.

I know my routine will not work for every family but it works for us. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

I co-slept with DD until very recently -- she is 2 now. We were afraid she would fall off of our bed, so we did rock her to sleep, of cuddle with her until she fell asleep then put her in a crib until she woke up -- usually about the time went to bed. We'd just put her in our bed then and she'd go right to sleep.

We did finally decide that she needed to sleep somewhere else -- too much kicking, waking, arguing with me about getting up, etc. And, with only a few nights of pretty miserable transition (i.e. sleeping on the pull-out in her room, putting her down awake, but too sleepy to protest multiple times per night) we have her mostly sleeping in her own crib for most of the night -- we usually end up with her in the bed around 5am or so.

Not sure if that advice helps. We had to stay with her until she was asleep everynight. And, just we ended up with a 2 year old who spends as much time in her own bed as all the other two year olds we know -- take that co-sleeping haters.

[Anonymous]

14 month olds should be sleeping a crib, so that they can't get out.

Why do you sleep with your toddler??

[Anonymous]

My son is 15 months. We say good night to Daddy, brush teeth, then nurse to sleep on the bed. I then turn on a video monitor and leave him sleeping until my husband and I go to bed later. Usually he goes to sleep fairly easily. Sometimes he will try to escape; I read to him in bed, but if he really won't settle, I let him go play for 30 more minutes or so, then try again. This does not happen all that often. If he really really won't settle, I put him in a carrier and wear him to sleep. It works for us. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Why do you sleep with your toddler??

Why do you care??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DD (14 months) used to go to bed so easily. I would give her a bath, nurse her on the bed, and that would be that. Now, on most nights, she wants to get off the bed after nursing and go out to the living room to read/play more. Then I try again (and sometimes again and again!) until she goes to sleep. It is getting a bit frustrating for all of us and I'm not sure what to do. I've tried reading to her on the bed but she just doesn't get sleepy that way, and ends up wanting to do the same thing. Suggestions?

This is normal and a stage. We had to change up our sleeping rituals from the easy nurse to sleep (and then I could sneak away) to something else. Now we nurse in the ergo (a surefire way to keep my little one contained and content) and then when he's asleep I lay him down. Sometimes he wakes when I put him down, but I just nurse him for another minute (out of the ergo) and he falls right to sleep.

We also have started to do a ritual where we say "night night" to our pets, let him turn off the lights, etc, every single night.

Just because you cosleep doesn't mean you can't have rituals, and people who say "put her in a crib" are only listing one of many options.

FWIW, my son is now 15.5 months and we're already coming back out of this phase, thanks to the "night night" ritual. Now we lie down and nurse half the time, like we used to. If he tries to get up, I pull him back down to me. If he protest again and again, we get up, repeat the "night night" and then he gets into the ergo. We do this less and less now, though, as he generally knows it's time to sleep.

Happy Tuesday!

[Anonymous]

I never meant to co-sleep but my daughter had to be moved out of her crib relatively early (at around 16 months) because she was climbing out of it (on the lowest setting) and I worried about her hurting herself. Now she's two and sleeping in my bed because she never really took to her toddler bed. (i think it's smaller than she'd like - she's a very spread-out sleeper.) At bedtime, we go upstairs and I give her the choice of beds. She usually chooses mine. I put her in bed and arrange her animals and put her books nearby. Occasionally she protests and clings, but most of the time, she's cool with me leaving her. I leave the hall light on so she can see if she wants to read. Sometimes she reads and sings to herself for half an hour, sometimes she falls asleep right away. After she's asleep, I go up to remove the books from the bed and tuck her in if need be. I'd like her to be in her own bed soon, but it's just the two of us in our house, so I don't mind the "company" as much as I would if I were married and this was affecting my sex life.

[Anonymous]

"

Anonymous wrote:14 month olds should be sleeping a crib, so that they can't get out.

Why do you sleep with your toddler??

",

Said the troll as she looked to pick a fight.

[Anonymous]

"14 month olds should be sleeping a crib, so that they can't get out

Why do you sleep with your toddler??"

Sounds like a kooky cult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Obviously the PPers are not co-sleepers and have no advice that will help you. Check out the foums at mothering.com. - forums are currently down for redesign. Check back soon. There is one specifically for co-sleeping and night-time parenting. They might have some ideas.

Here's what we do at our house. I part-time co-sleep. I nurse my 15mo to sleep. We do bath with 3YO brother. Read books with brother in a dimly lit room, 15 mo usually plays quietly with toys on the floor. By the time books are finished the 15mo usually shows signs of being tired. I play music for the 3Yo and take 15Mo into my bed and nurse him to sleep. There are time he doesn't want to sleep. I keep the lights off and minimize distractions. If he gets up, I keep laying him back down on the bed and softly repeat it's night-night time. Sometimes I sing. If he get's too upset, I bounce him on the yoga ball and that usually does it. Once big brother falls alseep, I move little bro to his crib. When he wakes up, I bring him into my bed and nurse him and he stays in bed with me the rest of the night. If I get truly desperate, I put him in the car and drive him around.

I know my routine will not work for every family but it works for us. Good luck.

I'm really a whatever works for you kind of gal, but man, if this is what "works" in your household--what a holy mess! I read this and just shudder.