Is This the Norm? My Husband Says I’m Wrong

[Anonymous]

I'm 27 years old with an 8 year old son. My husband is 49 and wants to take a vacation in July with his ex-wife and her three kids (25, 23, 21). He’s really close to them and says it’s normal and healthy to do things with his ex and her family. However, he doesn’t want to plan a vacation for my son and me. Instead, he wants my son to spend the summer at home while he goes off with them.
My son is really upset that he won’t be able to go on a vacation, and my husband made him cry. My husband doesn’t seem to care at all that we’re both hurt and upset. It feels like he’s putting his ex’s family above ours.

I don’t know what to do. It seems like he doesn’t care about me or my son at all. It’s so frustrating. How do you even handle something like this?

[Anonymous]

Is he your son’s father?

[Anonymous]

Are they HER three kids or THEIR three kids.

I am assuming your 8yo is not his child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 27 years old with an 8 year old son. My husband is 49 and wants to take a vacation in July with his ex-wife and her three kids (25, 23, 21). He’s really close to them and says it’s normal and healthy to do things with his ex and her family. However, he doesn’t want to plan a vacation for my son and me. Instead, he wants my son to spend the summer at home while he goes off with them.
My son is really upset that he won’t be able to go on a vacation, and my husband made him cry. My husband doesn’t seem to care at all that we’re both hurt and upset. It feels like he’s putting his ex’s family above ours.

I don’t know what to do. It seems like he doesn’t care about me or my son at all. It’s so frustrating. How do you even handle something like this?

To clarify, the three kids are not his biological kids? Was he their stepdad? Are you his 2nd or 3rd marriage? Is he in their lives on a daily/weekly basis?

And he doesnt want to take his biological son?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 27 years old with an 8 year old son. My husband is 49 and wants to take a vacation in July with his ex-wife and her three kids (25, 23, 21). He’s really close to them and says it’s normal and healthy to do things with his ex and her family. However, he doesn’t want to plan a vacation for my son and me. Instead, he wants my son to spend the summer at home while he goes off with them.
My son is really upset that he won’t be able to go on a vacation, and my husband made him cry. My husband doesn’t seem to care at all that we’re both hurt and upset. It feels like he’s putting his ex’s family above ours.

I don’t know what to do. It seems like he doesn’t care about me or my son at all. It’s so frustrating. How do you even handle something like this?

This has to be a troll, I mean roll this numbers back 9 years (assuming 9 month gestation for 8 year old)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is he your son’s father?

The kid is EIGHT. It doesn’t matter, he married the mom.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you and your son take a vacation together while he is off on his vacation? This would be a lovely bonding experience. If your husband kicks up a fuss about it, then you know you have a real problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm 27 years old with an 8 year old son. My husband is 49 and wants to take a vacation in July with his ex-wife and her three kids (25, 23, 21). He’s really close to them and says it’s normal and healthy to do things with his ex and her family. However, he doesn’t want to plan a vacation for my son and me. Instead, he wants my son to spend the summer at home while he goes off with them.
My son is really upset that he won’t be able to go on a vacation, and my husband made him cry. My husband doesn’t seem to care at all that we’re both hurt and upset. It feels like he’s putting his ex’s family above ours.

I don’t know what to do. It seems like he doesn’t care about me or my son at all. It’s so frustrating. How do you even handle something like this?

Assuming this is not a troll, you should all be vacationing together at the very least. But I assume they want to do an adult themed vacation with drinking gambling or similar and the 8 year old drags him down.

Hopefully he’s rich and you don’t have to work right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are they HER three kids or THEIR three kids.

I am assuming your 8yo is not his child?

I'm reading it like the other 3 kids are DH with his exW.

8yo is OP kid and not DH.

It's fine he wants to spend time with them, it's good for his kids. Not prioritizing you and the ,8yo is a separate issue. Can just you and your 8yo go on a vacation, OP? If DH issue is vacation time?

[Anonymous]

None are his biological kids?
But he helped raise his ex’s children?

if so, the part about him wanting to go on vacation with them is completely normal.
The part about not wanting to go with you and your child is very weird. Are you sure you’re not exaggerating and he would go on vacation with you another time during the summer and you’re just feeling put out because he will be gone for a little while in The part about not wanting to go with you and your child is very weird. Are you sure you’re not exaggerating and he would go on vacation with you another time during the summer and you’re just feeling put out because he will be gone for a little while in July?

[Anonymous]

You are his second family, and he wants to socialize with the first.

You should never have married him or had a child with him. He's a jerk.

I am not criticizing the age gap, BTW. I have a similar age gap with my husband, who has always prioritized our kids and me.

[Anonymous]

My husband is my sons biological father, and the three kids are also my husbands kids. I thought it was clear, sorry. OP

[Anonymous]

This is not normal. You know this.

[Anonymous]

No it wasn’t clear.

I think it’s fine he wants to go vacation with them for a week, maybe 2. Not the whole summer.
I also think he needs to do the samewith you and his 8yo as well. His adult kids wants to see their Dad. Not their Dad and his other son.

[Anonymous]

Your kid was his cost of admission into your body. That’s evident.

I feel bad for your son. Poor kid.

Were you an AP? Is he rich? Do you work?