Guy I was dating slept with someone else

[Anonymous]

We were not exclusive as we were both separated and starting to explore what’s out there. We had a strong connection but he still lived in the same house as his soon to be ex-wife.I just thought taking things slow would be prudent. I was seeing him once a week and we were texting and calling each other all the time.

He started going cold 2 days ago and tonight told me he was also seeing this other woman and she really liked him and wanted to be exclusive. He said he wanted that too and that they slept together last Friday.

I know we weren’t exclusive but I’m surprised at how much it hurts. We did not sleep together yet. I’m sitting here crying.

[Anonymous]

Rebuilding is hard. Consider it a gift. Grieve all the things. Pick yourself back up. Spend some time alone. Figure out what, if anything, this taught you about what you want and don’t, what you’re willing to give and gets you aren’t. Go back out there with greater clarity and a better ability to articulate these things. I’m sorry it hurts. Take good care.

[Anonymous]

I think you posted before. You are a bit obsessed with someone you were barely dating.

Maybe you need to only do exclusive dating.

[Anonymous]

He is still living with his wife and out skank8ng around.
Why are you crying over this douche?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is still living with his wife and out skank8ng around.
Why are you crying over this douche?

He moved into an apartment last weekend. I met him to help him shop a little bit.

I had no idea there was another woman in the picture who he was super serious with. I feel like such a fool!

[Anonymous]

Aww, hugs op. Dating is hard no matter what the circumstances. It’s okay to be sad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Aww, hugs op. Dating is hard no matter what the circumstances. It’s okay to be sad.

Thanks. I’m just so sad. 💔

[Anonymous]

Just text him “all the best “ and disengage. He’ll be back in a few months they always do if you didn’t let them f..k you

Most men are just boring users and wh..res. Most of them are not worthy your index finger.

Learn from this one case, be grateful you didn’t sleep with him (and don’t try to ever “prove” him you are more worthy than her by sleeping with him!) . And act accordingly with future connections . Men are two-timing a lot on OLD. Protect yourself

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He is still living with his wife and out skank8ng around.
Why are you crying over this douche?

This. Girl I know it hurts but you dodged a bullet!

[Anonymous]

I have been in OP's situation. I also have been in the situation of the guy OP was dating. It's a feature of modern dating. Everyone has lots of options. Neither one of those people is evil or stupid. If you are dating in the modern world, you need to be resilient. It's hard. Most people get hurt, and the few who don't are usually probably very avoidant or difficult people. A long term relationship is a short term relationship that lasted.

[Anonymous]

You're going to need to grow thicker skin if you want to date. Maybe take a break. Regroup and next time go in with very low expectations. And you're only seperated. Slow that role.

[Anonymous]

Focus on getting divorced first instead of trying to land the next one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have been in OP's situation. I also have been in the situation of the guy OP was dating. It's a feature of modern dating. Everyone has lots of options. Neither one of those people is evil or stupid. If you are dating in the modern world, you need to be resilient. It's hard. Most people get hurt, and the few who don't are usually probably very avoidant or difficult people. A long term relationship is a short term relationship that lasted.

It’s this. With they way dating works now, where if you are not exclusive it’s assumed there might be competitors, this happens. He gave you details of what happened when many might have ghosted you. I’m sorry it hurts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have been in OP's situation. I also have been in the situation of the guy OP was dating. It's a feature of modern dating. Everyone has lots of options. Neither one of those people is evil or stupid. If you are dating in the modern world, you need to be resilient. It's hard. Most people get hurt, and the few who don't are usually probably very avoidant or difficult people. A long term relationship is a short term relationship that lasted.

It’s this. With the way dating works now, where if you are not exclusive it’s assumed there might be competitors, this happens. He gave you details of what happened when many might have ghosted you. I’m sorry it hurts.

Ah, nope. OP’s dude just had his balls swollen and jumped onto exclusive relationship way too soon. Not even after he got a divorce. It tells a lot about him as impulse driven and OP should really not be upset about loosing him.
He definitely would be a terrible partner for her.

[Anonymous]

You likely dodged a major bullet. This is the type of BS my STBX flings around. Just ruining lives everywhere he goes…. He can’t be alone so he’s always either love bombing or moving to the next woman. Our divorce isn’t even final yet and there’s at least 2 women who seem to be really scarred by their relationships with him.

BTW, one of them was dating him when he moved from the spare bedroom to his apartment and helped him furnish it…. She really didn’t last very long and was particularly better that he dumped her for someone else. It sounds very similar to your situation, and so I am assuming that the guy was a walking red flag. I think a lot of people can hold it together for 3 to 12 months and then start showing their true colors. And obviously, I ignored 1 million red flags and married the jerk.

I’m sure it stinks now, but it sounds like this guy belongs in your rearview mirror