Postcard as a wedding thank-you -- is this the new norm?

[Anonymous]

I attended a wedding recently and just received a postcard thank-you for the wedding gift. I had no idea this was a thing! On one side, it had a photo of the couple. On the other side, there were a few pre-printed lines about how lucky the couple is, and then just two short handwritten lines thanking me specifically for my gift, and in the most generic way possible (basically: thank you for the X, we really appreciate it). There were exactly sixteen handwritten words in the whole thing.

Honestly, my middle schooler could have written a more personalized and appreciative thank you: We plan to use your generous gift to do X, we hope to see you at X so we can catch up and tell you about the honeymoon, etc.

Has anyone else felt annoyed by this apparent wedding trend, or am I just being grumpy?

[Anonymous]

That sounds lovely. They didn’t just thank you for “the kind gift,” they were specific about the coffee maker.

Just stop.

Your gift was acknowledged; you know it was received; you were thanked.

Stop, Gladys.

[Anonymous]

The pre-printed lines do sound lazy.

[Anonymous]

You're being grumpy. I didn't receive any sort of thank you for the last two weddings I attended so I would consider this much actually pretty thoughtful.

But now that I've typed out that sentence, I also sort of feel like the photo of the couple on the thank you card is so perfectly aligned with the me me me quality of the world and the social media generation now. But then again, a wedding is exactly when the couple should be the center of attention.

So clearly, it's nuanced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You're being grumpy. I didn't receive any sort of thank you for the last two weddings I attended so I would consider this much actually pretty thoughtful.

But now that I've typed out that sentence, I also sort of feel like the photo of the couple on the thank you card is so perfectly aligned with the me me me quality of the world and the social media generation now. But then again, a wedding is exactly when the couple should be the center of attention.

So clearly, it's nuanced.

Unless you feel the exact same way about holiday family photo cards, you are a massive hypocrite.

[Anonymous]

Seriously? Who TF cares?

[Anonymous]

This would not bother me at all. In fact, I hate the entire thank you note requirement and throw them directly into the trash can. Why do we add more stress to people after they just got married, had a baby, a death in the family? Let people relax a little. It's so dumb.

Then again, I still send Christmas cards so maybe I should take my own advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're being grumpy. I didn't receive any sort of thank you for the last two weddings I attended so I would consider this much actually pretty thoughtful.

But now that I've typed out that sentence, I also sort of feel like the photo of the couple on the thank you card is so perfectly aligned with the me me me quality of the world and the social media generation now. But then again, a wedding is exactly when the couple should be the center of attention.

So clearly, it's nuanced.

Unless you feel the exact same way about holiday family photo cards, you are a massive hypocrite.

Op here. Are you directing this comment to me? I love receiving holiday photo cards, and it doesn’t bother if the family doesn’t write a personalized message. Why would it? With a holiday photo card, I didn’t go out of my way to attend an out-of-town wedding and fork out hundreds of dollars for a gift.

[Anonymous]

I did not know my mother in law was on this forum!

[Anonymous]

OP, I will speak up for you! Expressing appreciation is an essential form of gratitude and manners and respect for the person who took the time and money to give you a gift. Pre-printed lines don’t cut it.

I am a stickler for thank you notes and have taught my teenaged DD how to write a good one. And that includes taking the time to include specific info about the gift. It’s not hard, and it’s basic courtesy.

[Anonymous]

I think that is fine.

We never received a thank you note at all, for the last 3 weddings we attended. For the first one, I wondered if they had even received our card & generous $ gift TBH (it was placed in a card box at the reception). After the third time, I realized maybe thank you notes just are not a “thing” anymore?

To me, it is rude. But I think times are changing. Be glad you received any note at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I will speak up for you! Expressing appreciation is an essential form of gratitude and manners and respect for the person who took the time and money to give you a gift. Pre-printed lines don’t cut it.

I am a stickler for thank you notes and have taught my teenaged DD how to write a good one. And that includes taking the time to include specific info about the gift. It’s not hard, and it’s basic courtesy.

There were pre-printed lines AND handwritten words. Or don’t you read?

[Anonymous]

It's fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I will speak up for you! Expressing appreciation is an essential form of gratitude and manners and respect for the person who took the time and money to give you a gift. Pre-printed lines don’t cut it.

I am a stickler for thank you notes and have taught my teenaged DD how to write a good one. And that includes taking the time to include specific info about the gift. It’s not hard, and it’s basic courtesy.

But it’s still perfunctory and meaningless. Fill-in-the-blanks and we all know it. People who care about this are just bored, I think.

I only send thank you notes if I was not able to thank the gift giver in person! If I already said thank you to your face, I don’t need to write you a note.

[Anonymous]

Wow, people say the younger generations are whiny, but here we have Jessica complaining that she…got a thank you card. That did have handwriting on it. And did mention the specific gift she gave.

Just because it’s unconventional, OP is racing to the Internet to whine about her feewings.