Prenup Situation - how to move forward?

[Anonymous]

Mid 30s male is engaged to early 30s female. She is a from a very well to do family and will be anticipating a high eight figure to low nine figure inheritance. She already has a substantial amount in a trust. Her personal income is in the high five figures. He will be completing his medical fellowship next year and will be make in the high six figures to start and will likely make low seven figures once he becomes a shareholder at the practice he is joining in two years.

Her family has proposed a prenup which shelters any premarital/trust assets that she has while his income would be considered marital/community property. He is concerned over this for several reasons as they met after he had already graduated from medical school so she was not a significant support during this time. He is also concerned that he may end up paying alimony to a far wealthier ex-wife in the event of divorce. Furthermore, he is concerned he will be expected to fund an expensive lifestyle with his income while her trust is untouched - thus limiting his ability to save.

What is a fair way to structure a prenup in these circumstance to respect his hard work and long term financial security while doing the same for her family wealth?

[Anonymous]

Get a lawyer, weirdo.

[Anonymous]

He doesn’t have to agree to any terms he doesn’t want? It’s a negotiation.

[Anonymous]

Agree. Go speak with a lawyer.

[Anonymous]

Hopefully a lawyer has seen this before and has some ideas. To me something where some amount of her assets become community assets each year seems fair.

[Anonymous]

I usually don’t repeat what others have said, but seriously he needs a lawyer.

[Anonymous]

All legitimate questions! They should both consult an attorney, to come up with something fair for all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Mid 30s male is engaged to early 30s female. She is a from a very well to do family and will be anticipating a high eight figure to low nine figure inheritance. She already has a substantial amount in a trust. Her personal income is in the high five figures. He will be completing his medical fellowship next year and will be make in the high six figures to start and will likely make low seven figures once he becomes a shareholder at the practice he is joining in two years.

Her family has proposed a prenup which shelters any premarital/trust assets that she has while his income would be considered marital/community property. He is concerned over this for several reasons as they met after he had already graduated from medical school so she was not a significant support during this time. He is also concerned that he may end up paying alimony to a far wealthier ex-wife in the event of divorce. Furthermore, he is concerned he will be expected to fund an expensive lifestyle with his income while her trust is untouched - thus limiting his ability to save.

What is a fair way to structure a prenup in these circumstance to respect his hard work and long term financial security while doing the same for her family wealth?

Absolutely your own lawyer is necessary.

But also, the bolded makes me wonder about the marriage a little, and the relationship. These are big concerns (that your marriage wont last, their your wife's tastes are more expensive than yours would be in a shared life).

[Anonymous]

This marriage seems to be in trouble already based on your description. We are leaving our child mid-eight figures (as you would describe it). You can bet there will be a prenup.

If I were in DD’s parent’s shoes, I would probably agree to fund grandchildren’s education and chip in on a house but insist on a prenup.

[Anonymous]

How is the prenup they’re discussing different from what would happen without a prenup? Trusts and inheritance are always separate aren’t they?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This marriage seems to be in trouble already based on your description. We are leaving our child mid-eight figures (as you would describe it). You can bet there will be a prenup.

If I were in DD’s parent’s shoes, I would probably agree to fund grandchildren’s education and chip in on a house but insist on a prenup.

Why do you say the marriage seems to be in trouble and then also say “you bet there will be a prenup”?

The very idea of a prenup is to think about what happens if the marriage falls apart— so do you think a prenup makes that more likely but you are ok with that, or do you think a prenup for someone else is a bad sign but for your kid it isn’t?

[Anonymous]

Simple, if he doesn’t work, then she has to fund their lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

He should hire a lawyer and not ask on a message board where people with zero legal knowledge feel free to give legal advice.

[Anonymous]

Does he have student loans?

[Anonymous]

You have to talk to your lawyer.