What’s it like for a SAHM after kids go to collegr

[Anonymous]

I’m in my forties and am a SAHM to 3 kids. I stopped working when I had my third child 8 years ago. My days are full and DH earns plenty. I’m wondering if I should go back to work in any capacity so I can ramp back up when kids leave for college.

My working mom friends all seem to feel overwhelmed and often say they would not work if they didn’t have to. DH earns a seven figure and our kids college funds are already fully funded.

[Anonymous]

I found that online classes to get trained in a new career has helped me.

[Anonymous]

Same, OP. Except I stopped when my second was born and haven’t worked in 14 yrs. I can’t see going back now bc of my spouses hours and how busy I am with the house and kids. I have another 10 yrs before the third/last child goes off to college, but I do think about it. Even going back part time will be hard after being out of the field so long and with many things having changed. Time will tell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I found that online classes to get trained in a new career has helped me.

My background is in finance. My friends are now very senior. I will likely earn less than what I earned fresh out of grad school in investment banking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m in my forties and am a SAHM to 3 kids. I stopped working when I had my third child 8 years ago. My days are full and DH earns plenty. I’m wondering if I should go back to work in any capacity so I can ramp back up when kids leave for college.

My working mom friends all seem to feel overwhelmed and often say they would not work if they didn’t have to. DH earns a seven figure and our kids college funds are already fully funded.

Are you asking how you should spend your time if (since) money is no object?

I guess I recommend a hobby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I found that online classes to get trained in a new career has helped me.

My background is in finance. My friends are now very senior. I will likely earn less than what I earned fresh out of grad school in investment banking.

Is OP the one with the finance background? Because I was the one who posted about online classes.

Anyway I’m working on my certificate in college counseling! I wish I had known about this before sending my own to college. I’m enjoying it and I think there are people with 40 students at a time who are making a decent amount. Obviously not as much as the senior finance folks… but a couple of hundred thousand ain’t too shabby, if you have the bandwidth. Or do the certificate now, help your own kids with their college apps and start a business when you are an empty nester if you are bored at that point. My husband has noticed a difference in me — doing something with my brain has been life-changing for me.

[Anonymous]

My mother stayed home with us and then started a similar transition once I (youngest of 3) hit middle school age. She verbalized it just like you do- she wanted to regain an identity and sense of purpose with her life as we started leaving the nest so that she wasn't left with nothing to do, lost, etc. Anyways she didn't go back to her previous career, she got a teaching degree of some kind- I think she took a bunch of classes at NVCC? And then she went on to teach history at NVCC. She taught very part time and only in the evenings until I left for college- I guess her mind frame was that she wanted to be available for us during the school day (illness, etc) but in reality it meant she was gone 2-3 evenings a week and I probably could have used her motherly guidance a little more instead of coming home to an empty house and having sex with my boyfriend after school.

[Anonymous]

NP here, to re-enter my field I also would entry level and the income just didn't justify the inconvenience to my family. In retrospect, I wish I took some classes at that point for a new career.

[Anonymous]

Yes, get a part time job now.

[Anonymous]

So you’ll be…50/60+ when your last leaves?

Start a sewing circle ma’am

The workplace won’t have room for you

[Anonymous]

It looks like me reinventing myself to get into a different field of work. I may find work, or not. The point is for me to learn something new, get a certification and exercise my brain. I spent many years volunteering but now it's time for career development.

[Anonymous]

Consider volunteering or working for a nonprofit. It might be hard to find the right fit, but I bet there are some nonprofits that could use help with finances. Nonprofit leaders and staffers often aren't very strong on the financial side so you might be able to be of real help.

[Anonymous]

My friend just had both kids leave for college and she just plays golf a lot. She seems happy with that.

[Anonymous]

I volunteer. It's incredibly rewarding, and allows me to visit the kids at college, or in their state (one is graduated and has a job elsewhere), travel on the kids spring breaks, take trips with spouse without worrying about work.

If you want to go back to work, by all means do it. But there's plenty your kids will still need once they are off to college (and even beyond that), and there are plenty of non profits that would love the help of a competent adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I found that online classes to get trained in a new career has helped me.

My background is in finance. My friends are now very senior. I will likely earn less than what I earned fresh out of grad school in investment banking.

Is OP the one with the finance background? Because I was the one who posted about online classes.

Anyway I’m working on my certificate in college counseling! I wish I had known about this before sending my own to college. I’m enjoying it and I think there are people with 40 students at a time who are making a decent amount. Obviously not as much as the senior finance folks… but a couple of hundred thousand ain’t too shabby, if you have the bandwidth. Or do the certificate now, help your own kids with their college apps and start a business when you are an empty nester if you are bored at that point. My husband has noticed a difference in me — doing something with my brain has been life-changing for me.

Are you saying you make 200k per year college counseling?