I got called a doormat

[Anonymous]

I’ve been married to the love of my life going on 3 years. We have been together for almost 6. I had a girls trip and I was told I’m a “ doormat” by some of them for how much I do for my husband. They made chiding jokes about it. I was taken aback by the comment and have been reflecting ever since. I know their comments shouldn’t hold weight but they do. I don’t want to change a thing because I adore my husband and our system works but I question if I really am a doormat.

[Anonymous]

If it works for you, who cares what other people say about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married to the love of my life going on 3 years. We have been together for almost 6. I had a girls trip and I was told I’m a “ doormat” by some of them for how much I do for my husband. They made chiding jokes about it. I was taken aback by the comment and have been reflecting ever since. I know their comments shouldn’t hold weight but they do. I don’t want to change a thing because I adore my husband and our system works but I question if I really am a doormat.

You should consider finding better friends instead of the negative, passive/ aggressive, frenemy ones you have now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married to the love of my life going on 3 years. We have been together for almost 6. I had a girls trip and I was told I’m a “ doormat” by some of them for how much I do for my husband. They made chiding jokes about it. I was taken aback by the comment and have been reflecting ever since. I know their comments shouldn’t hold weight but they do. I don’t want to change a thing because I adore my husband and our system works but I question if I really am a doormat.

Most women tend to be very catty and love to wreck other's relationships for various reasons such as jealousy or drama. Misery loves company sort of thing.

Never ever take relationship advice from your friends.

[Anonymous]

It's more about them and what is going on in their lives and relationships. If you are happy and not being coerced or taken advantage of, keep on keeping on

[Anonymous]

I'm going through a divorce and i am seeing my friends and their relationships through my lens. It's my problem. Not yours

[Anonymous]

What do you do that makes you a doormat?

[Anonymous]

Share less with those friends

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married to the love of my life going on 3 years. We have been together for almost 6. I had a girls trip and I was told I’m a “ doormat” by some of them for how much I do for my husband. They made chiding jokes about it. I was taken aback by the comment and have been reflecting ever since. I know their comments shouldn’t hold weight but they do. I don’t want to change a thing because I adore my husband and our system works but I question if I really am a doormat.

You should consider finding better friends instead of the negative, passive/ aggressive, frenemy ones you have now.

THIS! With friends like these, who needs enemies? YIKES!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you do that makes you a doormat?

I do a lot of the house stuff and childcare. My husband had a solo weekend with our 4 month old while I went on the trip. He asked some questions because I’m with the baby more. They kept making comments on how much he was texting me. A friend of ours is going through a divorce and she told me to watch it and not end up like her doing everything. I told her I was very happy with my situation and it works for us. They started sh*t talking their husbands. They made joking comments about my husband being a man child and called me a doormat. These were women I don’t know very well. Only two of the women I’m actual friends with and they stuck up for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you do that makes you a doormat?

I do a lot of the house stuff and childcare. My husband had a solo weekend with our 4 month old while I went on the trip. He asked some questions because I’m with the baby more. They kept making comments on how much he was texting me. A friend of ours is going through a divorce and she told me to watch it and not end up like her doing everything. I told her I was very happy with my situation and it works for us. They started sh*t talking their husbands. They made joking comments about my husband being a man child and called me a doormat. These were women I don’t know very well. Only two of the women I’m actual friends with and they stuck up for me.

I think you need to take what's worth taking here, which is that your husband may be a little too dependent on you as a parent, or may be passively punishing you for going out of town. It may seem manageable now but with two kids that will get old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve been married to the love of my life going on 3 years. We have been together for almost 6. I had a girls trip and I was told I’m a “ doormat” by some of them for how much I do for my husband. They made chiding jokes about it. I was taken aback by the comment and have been reflecting ever since. I know their comments shouldn’t hold weight but they do. I don’t want to change a thing because I adore my husband and our system works but I question if I really am a doormat.

As long as you are happy, system works for and benefits your life and he appreciates and reciprocates as much as he can, who cares what anyone thinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What do you do that makes you a doormat?

I do a lot of the house stuff and childcare. My husband had a solo weekend with our 4 month old while I went on the trip. He asked some questions because I’m with the baby more. They kept making comments on how much he was texting me. A friend of ours is going through a divorce and she told me to watch it and not end up like her doing everything. I told her I was very happy with my situation and it works for us. They started sh*t talking their husbands. They made joking comments about my husband being a man child and called me a doormat. These were women I don’t know very well. Only two of the women I’m actual friends with and they stuck up for me.

There is a reason why divorce is contagious.

[Anonymous]

NP: enjoy if he makes more than you. You need to add some value!

[Anonymous]

NP: and actually very true. Most of the feminists I know end up in unhappy marriages or divorced. Those in unequal though not super unbalanced marriages are much happier. They’re just jealous!