What things are you sensitive about seeing, because you've personally dealt with them?
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Anonymous
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I notice very distinctly when parents have a favorite child. I was very much NOT the favorite, and flat out disliked. Even following a famous person on IG, I picked up on which of their kids was their favorite, and can see it being around a family for as little as two hours.
As a picky eater who came by it honestly (my parents did All The Right Things you guys suggest here - my body just hates certain flavors deeply), I notice when people pick on people for what they're eating or not eating. At Thanksgiving my BIL told one person everything on their plate was beige, he yelled across a long table at someone to eat their special mac and cheese, and made fun of someone for only wanting one small piece of dessert. (He was sober and just super obnoxious.) |
Anonymous
| Seeing people on fire. |
Anonymous
| Family members commenting on adolescent girls' weight. |
Anonymous
| Seeing someone going thru chemo when you know it’s not going to work. |
Anonymous
+100 |
Anonymous
Same |
Anonymous
| Car crashes involving pedestrians/cyclists and the expression "hit by a bus." |
Anonymous
| House fires, infidelity in entertainment media |
Anonymous
I should add, I never personally dealt with a house fire, but there was a fire in my childhood I was a part of that affected me. |
Anonymous
| Domestic violence |
Anonymous
| Fireworks every damn holiday because it sounds just like gun fire I had to live through for years. |
Anonymous
| Young people being bullied. Teachers insensitive to genuine student anxiety (I went to school in Europe, I think this may not be typical here) |
Anonymous
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When a family has 3 or more kids and one kid gets ignored all the time or the parents only ever say "oh yeah Larlo is great because we never have to worry about him." I was the ignored kid no one ever had to worry about and around 35 I realized this screwed me up big time because I totally internalized the idea that my job in life is to be invisible and never have problems.
Also have radar for dominant siblings who are highly critical and teasing passive siblings a lot (and parents who ignore this behavior or even back it up, "Your sister's right, you are being a brat right now"). Lots of subtle family dynamics that I think a lot of people view as within the range of normal and not particularly dysfunctional or abusive, but that really screwed me up in frustrating ways. Recently a good friend of mine had a third kid and I see this stuff happening and it's really triggering. I am torn between wanting to intervene (say something to my friend, go out of my way to help the kid who I can see getting lost in the shuffle) and not wanting to spend any time with their family because it is very upsetting to me and no one understands why. |
Anonymous
| Violence in media. It is not entertaining to me, but distressing. |
Anonymous
Regarding that second one, I find that personality type triggering in general -- the person who is always loudly making jokes at other people's expense and thinks it's fine because their just "being funny." And if anyone is bothered by it, they are always "hypersensitive" or "how was I supposed to know" (that loudly making fun of someone might upset them? most people don't need advance warning on that one, genius). It would upset me regarding picky eating because I have a kid who is a picky eater and really tries to address it but it's hard. But it would bother me regarding anything. I don't get how people like that get to adulthood without someone at some point telling them to STFU because they are being unkind and it's not actually funny. |