Canceling plans and disappointing other families’ kids
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Anonymous
| Just wondering what everyone’s thoughts are on this. I have plans with a friend to go to a spring vendor market on Saturday. Our families are all friends and her husband and 11 yo ds have plans to go out with my dh and 9 and 11 yo dss to a driving range and 9 hole golf course. My friend is already threatening to ground her ds from going. My 11 yo has few friends and is really looking forward to this. If she grounds her ds, she will still expect me to go to the spring market with her. I really don’t want to. I will be pissed if she cancels the kids plans. Wwyd and what would you say if she cancels? |
Anonymous
| It’s ok for your kid to be disappointed every once in awhile. It builds resilience. |
Anonymous
I don't agree with your POV OP. Your kid needs to learn that sometimes plans change. I wouldn't tell a friend they can't punish their kid because of my own kid's feelings. But if you don't want to go to the market with her, that's a different issue - just don't go. |
Anonymous
| Your pissed she's discipling her kid? You think your kid's fun plan and lack of resiliency is her issue? |
Anonymous
| I think it sucks to mete out punishments that punish other kids too |
Anonymous
| I think its crappy to punish a kid that has plans with another, but its not up to you - if she cancels, that's what happens. Nothing you can do. |
Anonymous
THIS |
Anonymous
| It sucks for you and your kid, and I get that. But she's doing the right thing. Her kid shouldn't get to do something fun if he is in trouble. |
Anonymous
This. You are really off base OP. |
Anonymous
+1 This. 100%. |
Anonymous
| Why can't your husband still go with your two boys? |
Anonymous
| Everyone is saying that the ds should be resilient and realize that sometimes plans change. Well, maybe his mom needs to realize that sometimes plans change and OP may want to spend a day with her family if their plans get canceled. Fair is fair |
Anonymous
|
It's rude for her to cancel plans at the last minute. She shouldn't make her problem with disciplining her child everyone else's problem.
You apparently are in regular contact with her since you know she's threatening to do this, so when she says she's thinking of grounding the kid, just politely say "just please let me know what you decide, as I will make other plans with DH and DS, so maybe we can do the market another weekend when your DS is available." |
Anonymous
They should and OP should go too! |
Anonymous
| Stop being friends with your kids friends parents. It’s such an ick |