Implementing no photo sharing rule for in laws?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't be that daughter in law. Selfish.

Seriously, just stop being petty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We are private. We don't want our child plastered over anyone's social media.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not sure why so many parents here are ok with their childs pics being used in porn. Those folks don't deserve to be parents for playing a role in that. Shame on them for being so selfish. Sicko people.

https://www.kidspot.com.au/parenting/real-life/reader-stories/mums-warning-i-found-my-childrens-photos-on-porn-sites/news-story/d311f1affe3fbd6df8fbbee5bf58a8d3

+100000 what the f*ck is wrong with you people?

They just don't have any consideration for their kids. Selfish ignorant parents. Sad!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow, a lot of bitter grandparents on the forums today.

Maybe this is a generational thing but as a millennial (I’m 35) I don’t know a SINGLE person who thinks it’s okay to post the photo of another person’s child on the internet. There are so many reasons why that’s just inappropriate and unfair to the child. Protecting your child’s SAFETY, privacy and future right to control their internet presence is way more important than a grandparent’s hurt feelings.

Protecting your child’s internet anonymity is just GOOD PARENTING. If you’re a grandparent or relative and that offends you—let me remind you that its not about you.

If you do t understand this, then consider that this is probably the reason why you can’t be trusted with anyone’s photos.

I post pictures of my own children but relatives may not realize I have very tightly restricted privacy controls. Can’t say the same for every random aunt and internet-clueless grandparent out there.

Yes. All of this x 1 million.

Get over yourselves, grandparents.

I get the part about controlling your kids internet presence. But I really don’t see how this is a literal safety issue. Can you elaborate?

I am also curious...what horrible thing is going to happen?
I have a “no naked parts” photo policy, which is reasonable I think. What is going to happen with fully clothed pictures of children? I dont get it.

I don’t get it either. Unless you’re like, in witness protection, what concrete problem do you see arising?

I see this conversation has been derailed and I didn’t want to have to detail the dozens of reasons why, but this is literally one way child pornographers or just generally creepy internet people obtain many of their photos.
Google “digital kidnapping.”
https://www.fastcompany.com/3036073/the-creepiest-new-corner-of-instagram-role-playing-with-stolen-baby-photos

Here is a scenario:
Grandma is babysitting your potty training 2 year old and because she’s a clueless old person whom you gave license to liberally share photos, she snaps a photo of your kid sitting on the potty and shares it on Facebook. Or maybe the 2 year old was having a meltdown over something funny. Doesn’t need to be naked to be sensitive!
Now any rando she went to high school with and other clueless old relatives who find it cute and funny can take a screenshot and share it
And because of facial recognition when your child is 18 this photo of her will still be floating around the internet.

Not fair to the kid in the future and there are definitely creepy people out there collecting kid photos.

This is what you are so worked up about? Your baby pictures being used by teenage girls making crap up on the internet? I used to be in a multiples group and there were always people who pretended to have multiples. No idea why. But i never once felt threatened by them. Weird, yes. Worth worrying about and/or destroying a relationship with grandparents? Nope.

Seriously? If not being allowed to put a kid potentially at risk is going to make you destroy a relationship with your grandkid, then the poor kid is probably better off not having to deal with grandma's petty selfishness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why people get so angry about this. It’s quite simple. The parents decide whether they want pictures of their kid(s) posted on social media, and others abide by their wishes. It doesn’t matter if you would want something different for your own kids. Agree to disagree. But the parents get to decide for their own children until said children are old enough to make responsible decisions. If you don’t like it, don’t take/accept/expect photos of the children of other people.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why people get so angry about this. It’s quite simple. The parents decide whether they want pictures of their kid(s) posted on social media, and others abide by their wishes. It doesn’t matter if you would want something different for your own kids. Agree to disagree. But the parents get to decide for their own children until said children are old enough to make responsible decisions. If you don’t like it, don’t take/accept/expect photos of the children of other people.

It’s quite simple. 9 times out of 10 the parents are oversharing themselves. It’s not about safety to them. It’s some petty power struggle with grandma that will only end up damaging their/the child’s relationship with grandma over some stupid bullsh*t. Parents place their child in more harmful situations every single day without thinking twice. Taking a phone call or texting in the car with them. Having guns or drugs in unsafe places in the home. But god forbid Nana Rose share a photo from the first birthday party to her 85 year old friend Gertrude before you share it on your own timeline to Jimmy from 7th grade who you haven’t seen in 15 years and was a nice kid but now has a rap sheet a mile long or Coach Ron from the swim team who actually coaches because he likes looking at little kids in Speedos. Your outrage and “safety concerns” are wildly out of focus and damaging your child’s familial relationships.

[Anonymous]

I think the nutters on this thread have done an excellent job of illustrating the level of paranoid and craziness you will exude if you do this, especially while your baby is still unborn, OP.

[Anonymous]

I'm an older mom (51, youngest kid is 11yo) and the grandparents in our lives either died too soon or are too technologically inept for this to be an issue. But really OP I'm with those who say this is a dumb hill to die on. Yes, you have every right and responsibility to be cautious about your child's online presence. But equating that to banning a FB baby shot for the new grandparents is just silly. You'll have real dilemmas about internet presence in just a few years, when they want to play online video games or "like" a Youtube video. Or worse, when they are teenagers and posting nonstop pictures of themselves and their friends on fake Instagram accounts and Snapchat. Save your neurosis until you have real stuff to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've had this rule for years now including people taking pics of our kids. You need to be upfront about your decision and persistent when you see violations to make people take down pics. I'd say more than half my friends don't post kid pics on social media anyway so when we're around each others kids and taking pics all the parents at this point know what's ok to share on social media. It took a long time for my mom to follow the rule but after a lot of reminding she 100% follows it. My friends and family all use private albums to share kid pics with they trust now - maybe it's a generational thing. Sorry, but once a pic is on the public internet any sicko can use it and manipulate it. Google it.

If your children care in public place, you cannot enforce "no photos".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We've had this rule for years now including people taking pics of our kids. You need to be upfront about your decision and persistent when you see violations to make people take down pics. I'd say more than half my friends don't post kid pics on social media anyway so when we're around each others kids and taking pics all the parents at this point know what's ok to share on social media. It took a long time for my mom to follow the rule but after a lot of reminding she 100% follows it. My friends and family all use private albums to share kid pics with they trust now - maybe it's a generational thing. Sorry, but once a pic is on the public internet any sicko can use it and manipulate it. Google it.

If your children care in public place, you cannot enforce "no photos".

Are not care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents...hate to break it to you but you had your turn. You have absolutely zero claim to your grandchildren.

Does this philosophy also applies to free childcare for you? If they live close by, you're going to be sorry you're suck a dick!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents...hate to break it to you but you had your turn. You have absolutely zero claim to your grandchildren.

Does this philosophy also applies to free childcare for you? If they live close by, you're going to be sorry you're suck a dick!

Yep, the grandparents with poor judgment who don’t understand privacy also don’t get to babysit. It has to do with judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Grandparents...hate to break it to you but you had your turn. You have absolutely zero claim to your grandchildren.

Does this philosophy also applies to free childcare for you? If they live close by, you're going to be sorry you're suck a dick!

Yep, the grandparents with poor judgment who don’t understand privacy also don’t get to babysit. It has to do with judgment.

Your child is going to be very lonely. That’s my judgement.

[Anonymous]

OP here

I'm convinced this thread is just 3 grandmothers with chips on their shoulder. Maybe instead of derailing a thread you go with on your relationships.

I should have known better than to ask Dcum.

[Anonymous]

Not everyone telling you this is irrational is a grandmother. I’m not. I’m a parent of older kids who would advise you “cross that bridge when you get there” and “choose your battles wisely”.