Thread for griping about Mother’s Day not meeting expectations

[Anonymous]

Why has Mother's Day turned into an excuse to avoid your children?

I can see asking for these things on your birthday, but the point of mother's day is for your kids (not your husband) to celebrate you. Of course when they're young, they can't go buy you a gift, so what do you expect? This is so confusing to me.

[Anonymous]

I had a great Mother's Day. DH got DD (2.5) in the morning so I could get ready in peace. He made waffles. I got a card and cute present from DD that she made at preschool. DH wrote me a nice card and got me a present I really wanted.

We ordered in for dinner so there wouldn't be a mess in the kitchen.

Great day!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why has Mother's Day turned into an excuse to avoid your children?

I can see asking for these things on your birthday, but the point of mother's day is for your kids (not your husband) to celebrate you. Of course when they're young, they can't go buy you a gift, so what do you expect? This is so confusing to me.

I had a lovely morning with my children, then my husband took them for an outing in the afternoon so I could get some very rare alone time. It's great that you don't want alone time on Mother's Day. I want SOME. And I'm a damn good mother.

[Anonymous]

DH took our family of 6 to a very nice brunch (not at an overwhelmed restaurant, so the atmosphere was very nice and the food/champagne excellent), he then directed the kids to bring down my presents when we got home and they did a great job showing me their special gifts. They all then scooted out into the rain for a few hours and let me relax...when I went to my favorite cozy spot to chill, I found a Tiny Jewel Box box with a beautiful diamond bracelet inside it.

When DH and kids came home, they made a mess and a lovely dinner. DH mostly cleaned up the mess.

Pretty solid effort in my book.

[Anonymous]

Wow - thank you for sharing this. It describes my relationship to a T. A few years ago I started making my own dinner reservations for the family and buying my own birthday cake just so there would be something to mark the occasion. For mother's day yesterday I made the dinner reservations. My husband tends to go along grudgingly, so even though I'm taking charge of my own celebration and doing things I like to do, it feels empty because he is sending the signal that it's burdensome or pointless.

Anonymous wrote:This is a must read for those who never get much if anything from their husbands on special days like Mother's Day or Birthdays. It is something I came across when researching to get some info to help a friend in crisis.


"
Mommy’s Birthday Doesn’t Matter

We can look at birthdays to explore the dynamics common to interactions between partners in an ASD/NT couple. When he does not acknowledge her birthday, and she asserts that his behavior has upset her, he may respond that he did not mean to upset her; therefore, she shouldn’t be upset. Or he might tell her that because birthdays come once year and everyone has them, they are no big deal and she should stop making such a big deal about them. Or he could tell her they celebrated her birthday last year. Or that birthdays are for children. In other words, he may hold her to the same idea regarding birthdays he holds himself. He may criticize her to the degree that her feelings about birthdays differ from his. He will miss her distress.[...]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why has Mother's Day turned into an excuse to avoid your children?

I can see asking for these things on your birthday, but the point of mother's day is for your kids (not your husband) to celebrate you. Of course when they're young, they can't go buy you a gift, so what do you expect? This is so confusing to me.

I had a lovely morning with my children, then my husband took them for an outing in the afternoon so I could get some very rare alone time. It's great that you don't want alone time on Mother's Day. I want SOME. And I'm a damn good mother.

+1 - took the kids out as a family for a morning activity and had a nice lunch together, then I peaced out to be ALONE. It was great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was married I hated it. Nothing we did was ever good enough for Mother's Day. Now that I am divorced I love it.

But does your girlfriend have kids?

I don't have a girlfriend. I've had a few since getting divorced, but most of them are more trouble than they are worth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was married I hated it. Nothing we did was ever good enough for Mother's Day. Now that I am divorced I love it.

But does your girlfriend have kids?

I don't have a girlfriend. I've had a few since getting divorced, but most of them are more trouble than they are worth.

Not surprised.