My son brought a friend on vacation

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, stop taking taking the 19 year olds to more expensive places. Give them some money and send them to a pizza place, or a buffet or a taco place where the dude can gourge himself until they run out of money.

You and everyone else can go to the nice seafood restaurant.

Good advice. And take them somewhere where they can pick up snacks in bulk. And SPEAK UP ffs.

What the EFF makes you think we didn't buy a ton of food when there's 6 people. I don't know how many times I can say it. It's not a scarcity issue. If we bought 3 dozen donuts he would eat 30 of them. If it's there, it's eaten, period.

And I'm not sending my son, who is on family vacation before going back to college, to a separate dinner because he happened to invite a bottomless pit to join. I suck it up and pay the extra dinner because my family wants to spend time together especially since our son is away at school now.

This place truly has zero redeeming factors. No matter how common and unarguable an issue you a-holes are like piranhas jumping in with wild fantasies of 1%ers too cheap to buy more than a loaf of bread and simultaneously telling me I am a bad person/awful host who has made him feel awful but also haven't made him feel bad enough because I've just sucked it up and vented here rather than shame him. Throw in some nonsense about spray sunscreen and an eating disorder and it's Yahtzee.

....but you did kind of open yourself up to it...and it's DCUM. No issue is inarguable. I'm pretty sure my child rearing skills, intimate relationships, and the improper training of my small, high strung dog have been maligned by DCUM more than once.

[Anonymous]

So you are willing to pay for this kid to jet ski and parasail but if he orders "catch of the day" for dinner that is way too rich for your blood.

Does that even make a bit of sense?

[Anonymous]

I sort of get it OP. This is a house guest you don't know really well who is rude, unappealing and to top it off is blowing through your food budget. The part would annoy me the most is not the restaurant ordering but eating all of the food in the house so you have to keep buying more. I understand that you wouldn't want to follow some people's suggestions to have the boys buy the food themselves or limit restaurant orders. That would just embarrass your house guest at this point.

I do think you could ask him to help a little. That might make you feel better about the situation. I would also try to look on the bright side that this kid feels comfortable with your family to help himself to food and relax.

On the sunscreen issue though - that spray stuff gets used up FAST. If you and two kids already used it, I am not at all surprised that a large 19 year old boy would finish off a bottle of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why did your son bring a friend on vacation at their ages? I can see if your son is 6, but 19??

Because the younger two are girls and we don't want our son to be stuck inside all night once the younger ones get tired or stuck doing only activities they can do. Ideally, the friend is so they can go out at night or do stuff like jet skiing and just keep him company. However, this kid also doesn't happen to want to go out in the evening, won't parasail or jetski, and hates walking or physical activity so it's been entirely pointless having him join. He goes along on group activities but has mostly complained about heat, water temp, fun level etc. Trust me, I regret the invite.

He's your son's friend, though, right? As in, your son invited him? So, it seems REALLY unlikely your son would invite someone on a trip who didn't want to participate in the things your son wanted to do on the trip. Perjaps the message is actually coming from your son, and it is saying, "Mom, I do not want to be on this family beach trip, so I am going to ruin it."

Or alternatively, the friend is actually more fun than the uptight mom would care to admit and OP's son actually likes him.

Lol. You guys and your fairy tales. His other, more close friends all couldn't come due to work and other vacations. This is basically a 3rd tier friend from high school who my son thinks is okay but also now wishes he hadn't brought since he's gotten lectured at various points for what he orders, what he won't eat , using a plate for spaghetti instead of a bowl, what towel he chose to use, wanting to go out at night, etc.

Spaghetti should be on a plate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So you are willing to pay for this kid to jet ski and parasail but if he orders "catch of the day" for dinner that is way too rich for your blood.

Does that even make a bit of sense?

::nods::
Where is the line?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why did your son bring a friend on vacation at their ages? I can see if your son is 6, but 19??

Because the younger two are girls and we don't want our son to be stuck inside all night once the younger ones get tired or stuck doing only activities they can do. Ideally, the friend is so they can go out at night or do stuff like jet skiing and just keep him company. However, this kid also doesn't happen to want to go out in the evening, won't parasail or jetski, and hates walking or physical activity so it's been entirely pointless having him join. He goes along on group activities but has mostly complained about heat, water temp, fun level etc. Trust me, I regret the invite.

He's your son's friend, though, right? As in, your son invited him? So, it seems REALLY unlikely your son would invite someone on a trip who didn't want to participate in the things your son wanted to do on the trip. Perjaps the message is actually coming from your son, and it is saying, "Mom, I do not want to be on this family beach trip, so I am going to ruin it."

Or alternatively, the friend is actually more fun than the uptight mom would care to admit and OP's son actually likes him.

Lol. You guys and your fairy tales. His other, more close friends all couldn't come due to work and other vacations. This is basically a 3rd tier friend from high school who my son thinks is okay but also now wishes he hadn't brought since he's gotten lectured at various points for what he orders, what he won't eat , using a plate for spaghetti instead of a bowl, what towel he chose to use, wanting to go out at night, etc.

So a good lesson in natural consequences for both you and your son. Don't bring a third-tier friend on vacation if you can't afford the market price fish.

Did I say I can't afford market price fish? My issue is a kid who has gobbled up every possible commodity we have ordering the most expensive item at every meal out when he would be equally as satisfied with a pack of hot dogs to himself. I grew up going on family vacations with friends and never would have sat around refusing to help out or ordering menu items more expensive than what the parents themselves order. The kid tried to order FILET one night. (That one actually got a no.)

I have no idea where you're on vacation, but I'm picturing OC, so I picked a restaurant at random that I'm familiar with in OC (Ropewalk) and pulled up the menu.

https://oceancity.ropewalk.com/menu/

The filet is $31. The average price of the entrees is $26.23. If that extra FIVE DOLLARS is that outrageous to you, you probably shouldn't be eating in restaurants.

Let's be real...this has nothing to do with money and everything to do with the fact that you don't like this fat kid who isn't adequately contrite for daring to be fat in your presence. You're annoyed that he's not ashamed of his body and eating habits.

[Anonymous]

Don’t eat with them, it’s a vacation don’t stress about bottles of sunscreen. It’s not his fault he was raised poorly. Just don’t engage with him, pretty simple.

[Anonymous]

Op sounds awful with her hateful replies upthread. She sounds mean, while most of the advice on this thread was decent, including my own advice.

[Anonymous]

3rd tier friend. Good God you sound awful.

[Anonymous]

OP, your son invited the dude. This is your problem and your son's problem. If you wanted to go on a family only vacation then tell your kids there is a no friends rule from now on.

[Anonymous]

Op was probably the fat kid when she was young and has taken the position of those who ridiculed her.

[Anonymous]

Poor fat kid. He has to spend his vacation with OP.

[Anonymous]

Poor kid probably doesn't want to use his credit card and his driver's license to rent equipment for his "friends".

I can't imagine Op renting a jet ski for a kid that she clearly thinks is an irresponsible loser.

I feel bad for this poor kid .

[Anonymous]

Or...maybe the kid is refusing to use a fake ID to go out to bars and rent equipment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:3rd tier friend. Good God you sound awful.

+1