SAHM Reentering the Work Force - What not to do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Your sre seething with insecurity. Sad on you.

Not the PP, but that's just reality. You don't say something like that in an interview unless you are a moron.

I understand that, but the part I bolded belies the poster's baggage she carries with her to work.

I feel sorry for many women here, so conflicted and bitter about their choices.

No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Agree.

And here is the basic issue (finally). Isn't this REALLY about the WOHM interviewer not wanting to feel like she didn't raise her kids? Look, work/life issues are tough choices, and maybe both SAH or WOH choices are imperfect. The only difference is that once the SAHM reenters the workforce, the WOHM has a mommy-powerplay moment. I think some of us on this thread are reacting to the nastiness of a WOHM/interviewer enjoying the opportunity to mock the SAHM reentering the workforce.

I stayed at home with my kids and re-entered the workforce after a number of years. I kept up my skills and even did some freelance jobs to keep up my resume. Nevertheless, interviewing with women was uncomfortable many times because of these issues. I hate to say it but men were much more non-plussed about the time away from a corporate job.

And other threads, like the daycare one mentioned above, WOHMs are reacting to the utter nastiness of the SAHMs who suggest we don't love our kids enough because we dump them in daycare all day. In this case, though, it's more objective - either you have the skills to do a job or you don't. And other than daycare, there are very few jobs out there that rely on childcare skills to get the job.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Agree.

And here is the basic issue (finally). Isn't this REALLY about the WOHM interviewer not wanting to feel like she didn't raise her kids? Look, work/life issues are tough choices, and maybe both SAH or WOH choices are imperfect. The only difference is that once the SAHM reenters the workforce, the WOHM has a mommy-powerplay moment. I think some of us on this thread are reacting to the nastiness of a WOHM/interviewer enjoying the opportunity to mock the SAHM reentering the workforce.

I stayed at home with my kids and re-entered the workforce after a number of years. I kept up my skills and even did some freelance jobs to keep up my resume. Nevertheless, interviewing with women was uncomfortable many times because of these issues. I hate to say it but men were much more non-plussed about the time away from a corporate job.

You completely have summed up this thread. Sad to say, but I thank God th at men still dominate upper management positions because they just don't carry as much emotionaly baggage into the work place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Your sre seething with insecurity. Sad on you.

Not the PP, but that's just reality. You don't say something like that in an interview unless you are a moron.

I understand that, but the part I bolded belies the poster's baggage she carries with her to work.

I feel sorry for many women here, so conflicted and bitter about their choices.

No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that.

Thank you for proving my point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I understand that, but the part I bolded belies the poster's baggage she carries with her to work.

I feel sorry for many women here, so conflicted and bitter about their choices.

Oh please. This is such the typical SAHM response to any time a working mom says - hey, stop implying that I'm not raising my children b/c I am working. Gee, because we point out that (1) it isn't true and (2) it isn't very nice and likely to offend working moms, we much be "conflicted" and "bitter" about our choices.

Ummm, sorry, but I'm not at all bitter or conflicted. I just don't like the sanctimonious SAHM who thinks she is a better mother than me simply by virtue of the fact that I work and she does not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Your sre seething with insecurity. Sad on you.

Not the PP, but that's just reality. You don't say something like that in an interview unless you are a moron.

I understand that, but the part I bolded belies the poster's baggage she carries with her to work.

I feel sorry for many women here, so conflicted and bitter about their choices.

No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that.

Guys, I'm the poster of that and I in no way meant to put my foot in my mouth. I work out of the home! It wasn't meant as anything other than, "quick, this is what I've been doing but now I'm going to highlight all of the other skills I bring to the table FOR THIS JOB." Move along now. I was trying to help SAHMs think about how to market themselves in an interview, not making any commentary about who is raising the children! OK? I was trying to help. Now stop beating this dead horse. If we all want to help each other, let's not lose sight of the fact that some SAHMs might want to actually get some tips on how to present themselves in an interview and what might help them. I gave a very real example of how my sister marketed herself in an interview and is working now. I'm sorry I even tried the way you people jump on every little word here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Your sre seething with insecurity. Sad on you.

Not the PP, but that's just reality. You don't say something like that in an interview unless you are a moron.

I understand that, but the part I bolded belies the poster's baggage she carries with her to work.

I feel sorry for many women here, so conflicted and bitter about their choices.

No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that.

[Anonymous]

Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

[Anonymous]

The MAN was the PLAN.
Please hire me.

[Anonymous]

Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

[Anonymous]

"No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that. "

Guess what poster, if I were your manager and I went to IT and saw what you just posted (whiI do spot checks with IT) I would fire you. I would consider you unfit to manage or interview applicants, due to your inablity to separate your prejudices from the work place. Not to mention your attitude in dealing with other women while on the job after being so worked up on a parenting site.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"No I really don't think she's bitter or conflicted. If I were interviewing that person, I would internally roll my eyes. I'd also be tempted to say "who is raising them now?". I am not bitter or conflicted. As someone who is looking for an employee with tact, I don't want to hire someone who puts their foot in their mouth like that. "

Guess what poster, if I were your manager and I went to IT and saw what you just posted (whiI do spot checks with IT) I would fire you. I would consider you unfit to manage or interview applicants, due to your inablity to separate your prejudices from the work place. Not to mention your attitude in dealing with other women while on the job after being so worked up on a parenting site.

ooooh, I'm shaking in my boots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

Do you work because you love what you do or because you need to work to survive?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

I can give you an example. My sister was a SAHM. During that time, however, she volunteered at a nonprofit and then sat on the board of one of her kids' pre-schools. She stayed at home fully for three years. She recently want back to work, and if this question was posed to her, she could answer (assuming she didn't put all of her volunteer work on her resume, but she did, so she actually didn't have a gap.):
"I was raising my children, and during that time I volunteered at XYZ, spearheaded and managed their ABC program which included a fundraiser A and gala B. I produced all of their marketing materials for these events as well as coordinated and managed all of the other volunteer efforts. Under my marketing strategy, our fundraiser was covered in This publication and showcased on This television program. The gala was spotlighted on That television show and appeared in 10 publications. Under my direction, these efforts raised $xyz. As a board member, I spearheaded 4 fundraising efforts, including....."
You get the point.
No one cares about your children. They care about whether they want to hire you for a job.

The "I was raising my children" part is where you would lose me. We all raise our children. Are you implying that the interviewer wasn't because she was working?

Since this has been reposted at least 15 times, I should clarify that I am not a "she". I am a "he" (Man here).