SAHM Reentering the Work Force - What not to do

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

Why would you think that simply based on the fact that she stayed at home for a while? You don't know the circumstances in someone's life and why they make the choices they do. Why would you feel judged by someone else's life choices?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am now beginning to think about returning to work after almost 10 years-I had no idea that there was so much contempt for me out there

See, this is a classic communication issue. Not contempt for you as a person, or even for your choice - just a bit of impatience with how your 10 year gap will inevitably be perceived by people in the workplace who did not SAH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

Yep. You're right. You women have got this one all figured out yourselves. We men will just sit on the sidelines and watch the battle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op I get what you were trying to say, but you come off as very defensive.
Her answers were not a personal attack on you or your choices, and most likely will have no bearing on her job performance.
Luckily I work for a very supportive female boss who *gets* the work/life balance and actually encourages me to spend great time with my kids, and doesn't expect me to pretend I am not a mom as well as an employee
Hopefully as you mature you will become more supportive of other women and their choices

Do you make a lot of money, or not? If you make an average salary, no sweat. If you're talking about a highly paid position, it's a totally different ballgame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What would the question in the interview be? "Explain the gap in your resume?" , "Tell me about the past ten years?" Or would the interviewer simply ask about her latest office related experience?

I can't see how she could phrase an answer without referring to her children with the first two questions.

No, there's no way around that.

But let's say Candidate A states she spent the last 10 years caring for her children. Candidate B states the same thing but adds that she earned a certification in Area X and/or did some side jobs related to her field.

Whom would you hire?

someone who knows the difference between who and whom

YOU are an idiot! I can't believe you just posted that line with an eye roll!

YOU (subj) would hire (verb) WHOM (object).

Example A: You would hire SHE.

or

Example B: You would hire HER.

huh - I wonder if B is the right answer.

[Anonymous]

"Do you not understand that there are lots of reasons to work other than money? I went back because I felt like it was time, I was ready to, my kids are older, and a great opportunity presented itself in my field, at an agency I like for a cause I feel strongly about; so I went back to "save the world," so to speak. "

Ah, I get it. I work primarily for the $250,000 I make, not to save the world. Totally different. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

Do you work because you love what you do or because you need to work to survive?

Both. I need the money. But if I didn't, I would still work. Your point? I'm interested.

Let me say, another reason I wouldn't want to work with such a person is because I generally find people that hold that kind of opinion to be close-minded. Not an asset in the workplace, and often a liability. And someone who made that kind of opinion known in an interview? Not very good judgment on their part.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

Why would you think that simply based on the fact that she stayed at home for a while? You don't know the circumstances in someone's life and why they make the choices they do. Why would you feel judged by someone else's life choices?

Sigh, This is not what the first poster said. She is not judging someone who stayed home; she is was commenting on the language used to describe the decision to stay home.

Keep trying to miss the point, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

Yep. You're right. You women have got this one all figured out yourselves. We men will just sit on the sidelines and watch the battle.

Thanks for proving (twice) that men can be catty bitches, too. Welcome to the club!

[Anonymous]

Is reading comprehension amongst SAHMs at an all-time low?

OP said she didn't like nonprofessional behavior at interviews, something I personally have seen SAHMs do when "explaining" the gaps in their resumes. It was nothing against SAHMs as a group other than that they are frequently underprepared to speak to what they've done during their time away from work.

I have nothing against (non-stupid) SAHMs and only care about your skills and whether you stayed on top of your industry when you were out. If you did, I'll gladly hire you. And you can talk about your kids, too (after you impress me with your skill set). I'm a hardcore working mom and I like talking about kids...but only after the business portion of meetings is over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

Yep. You're right. You women have got this one all figured out yourselves. We men will just sit on the sidelines and watch the battle.

It's really not funny and something to ridicule. These threads always go badly because women are horribly conflicted about whatever choice they make, and I don't care that someone is going to come on here and say they are very secure in their decision, blah blah blah. It's very hard to decide what's best for your family, and that includes your husband. Your trivializing it makes you look like a douchebag with all sensitivity chips missing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, I don't want to work with someone who thinks I didn't raise my children properly because I chose to work. I don't think those kinds of women deserve to work. I'd rather hire someone else.

I said it.

Why would you think that simply based on the fact that she stayed at home for a while? You don't know the circumstances in someone's life and why they make the choices they do. Why would you feel judged by someone else's life choices?

Oh, I wouldn't think that based on the fact that she stayed home! Only if she said something obnoxious in the interview, like "my children are my first priority so I took a break from my carreer" etc. That's what the thread is about!

[Anonymous]

Please, let's keep belaboring a point that was explained away. It's very fruitful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

Yep. You're right. You women have got this one all figured out yourselves. We men will just sit on the sidelines and watch the battle.

Thanks for proving (twice) that men can be catty bitches, too. Welcome to the club!

Thanks! Can I have my V-card?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man here. Are we now entering the "repost and respond" phase of this topic? If so, please let me know so I can stop looking for original thoughts.

Thanks

You should stop reading. You, obviously, have nothing useful to contribute anyway.

Yep. You're right. You women have got this one all figured out yourselves. We men will just sit on the sidelines and watch the battle.

It's really not funny and something to ridicule. These threads always go badly because women are horribly conflicted about whatever choice they make, and I don't care that someone is going to come on here and say they are very secure in their decision, blah blah blah. It's very hard to decide what's best for your family, and that includes your husband. Your trivializing it makes you look like a douchebag with all sensitivity chips missing.

I think he is awesome and I'd rather work for him over any of you hormonal nut jobs.