DC Urban Moms Farce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and while we're on the subject,

Giving birth was the most wonderful transformative experience of my life.

It was that experience that made me a real woman, and gave me the empathy and compassion to TRULY love a child.

It must have been a vaginal birth then b/c C-sections don't count as real births. I mean how do you become a "real woman" by having someone cut open your stomach? Nothing transformative about that!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:and while we're on the subject,

Giving birth was the most wonderful transformative experience of my life.

It was that experience that made me a real woman, and gave me the empathy and compassion to TRULY love a child.

No no no. It was BREASTFEEDING that made me a real woman and gave me the empathy and compassion to TRULY love a child.

[Anonymous]

oh ladies, you arent really a woman until you've tried "the lifestyle"

[Anonymous]

My birthing experience was better than a 5 star spa treatment! I feel so bad for those moms that just had a regular delivery or even GASP! a c-section. You truly missed out. You absolutely must make the birth as relaxing as possible. You are your child's advocate! Do not listen to the hype your doctor and nursing staff throw on you! C-sections are WRONG!!! They are not natural and it is just the medical community trying to protect themselves and take the easy way out.

We couldn't have asked for a better day. We hired a violinist, and had soothing mood light installed in the delivery room. My doula was giving me a full body massage as DS popped out of my freshly waxed va-jay-jay into a warm vat of soothing water flown in from the topics. MY darling DH was with me all the way! He was videotaping this beautiful experience (it is on youtube - please check it out - it will make you cry!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I bet my son's at a better camp than your son.

Impossible. We're at Beauvoir.

[Anonymous]

Ummm. Jeff? Mr. Steele? Moderator?

Aren't you going to step in an moderate? If you're going to let us run wild all day, you might as well partake . . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:oh ladies, you arent really a woman until you've tried "the lifestyle"

What is wrong with you? It should be "aren't"

[jsteele]

Anonymous wrote:Ummm. Jeff? Mr. Steele? Moderator?

Aren't you going to step in an moderate? If you're going to let us run wild all day, you might as well partake . . .

Don't worry, I'm keeping an eye out for sock puppets.

[Anonymous]

I'm concerned that one of my nannies may have eaten a hemp donut that was not fairly traded. I was thinking of telling her to drive our Chevy Suburban SUV back to Takoma Park from our house in DC (of course) to get one that is organic AND fairly traded. I'm not sure that I should say anything, though, since I saw her post on this forum that her and her husband only have 90K in retirement & she's in her 30's. I thought the salary, health insurance, car & monthly spa treatments were enough for her, but lately she has been asking to work 23 hour days instead of 24 & is complaining about the 12 months on, 1 hour off schedule we accommodated for her. Since I am a SAHM & we have an Au pair, a night nurse & 2 other nannies, plus the kids go to Beauvoir during the day, I didn't think it was a big deal.

[Anonymous]

jsteele wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ummm. Jeff? Mr. Steele? Moderator?

Aren't you going to step in an moderate? If you're going to let us run wild all day, you might as well partake . . .

Don't worry, I'm keeping an eye out for sock puppets.

Please also be sure to remove any advertising!

[Anonymous]

DC is 2 weeks old and I have lost all the baby weight and my stomach is totally flat again....my concern is that I will get too thin and everyone will be jealous of me <sigh>

[Anonymous]

I gave my DH a wonderful display of my children's pictures and let him take the nanny and the children out all by himself on Father's Day. My nanny is the MOST WONDERFUL YOUNG AMERICAN Nanny in the world and they had a great time. Can you believe that he still wanted SEX after such a meaningful day?

He didn't come home the next day, and the nanny didn't show up either - should I be worried?

[Anonymous]

I'm six months pregnant and still fit into my size zero pants. I've only gained about four pounds. Is this average?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow - I'm so excited as this is my very first post on a message board of any sort! You see - I live WAAAAYYY out in the suburbs - a tiny town called Rockville and we just got the internet! I'm so excited I can hardly contain myself!!!

And I am hearing rumors that CABLE television and INDOOR PLUMBING will also be coming to Rockville! Yahoo - it's like we're not living in some backwoods place anymore!

Wait a second...oh, s&*%. This isn't my house. D&^*. I went into the wrong house again. It's so hard finding your house when they all look alike. Better go back to my car and drive around my cul-de-sac and hope I can find which house is mine.

Hate when I do that - and I was having such a good day for finally getting the internet, too

OMG - this was hilarious! THe funniest post in this entire thread by far!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow - I'm so excited as this is my very first post on a message board of any sort! You see - I live WAAAAYYY out in the suburbs - a tiny town called Rockville and we just got the internet! I'm so excited I can hardly contain myself!!!

And I am hearing rumors that CABLE television and INDOOR PLUMBING will also be coming to Rockville! Yahoo - it's like we're not living in some backwoods place anymore!

Wait a second...oh, s&*%. This isn't my house. D&^*. I went into the wrong house again. It's so hard finding your house when they all look alike. Better go back to my car and drive around my cul-de-sac and hope I can find which house is mine.

Hate when I do that - and I was having such a good day for finally getting the internet, too

OMG - this was hilarious! THe funniest post in this entire thread by far!

Totally agree!!!! This was so laugh out loud funny!