What's wrong with a kid being "overscheduled"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

You sound completely insane, you realize that right?

Says the parent whose kids childhood is ruined because the neighbor is busy.

No one said that, but its hard to believe that a kid who lives in a neighborhood full of kids never wants time to play or hang out with them.

Maybe it’s because your judgmental personality and bad attitude precede you. Take a hint.

[Anonymous]

my kids like to compete in sports and train and be the best. They dont know a life outside of this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

I didn't say that this was an issue for me, im participating in a thread about overscheduling.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

You sound completely insane, you realize that right?

Says the parent whose kids childhood is ruined because the neighbor is busy.

No one said that, but its hard to believe that a kid who lives in a neighborhood full of kids never wants time to play or hang out with them.

Maybe it’s because your judgmental personality and bad attitude precede you. Take a hint.

What about my attitude is bad and judgemental?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents who are like this tend to have hyper kids that are hard to be around. Non-hyper kids don’t need this level of entertainment at all times and the parents need fewer breaks from them too.

While I disagree with your delivery, I do agree that my ADHD extroverted kid is happiest with a booked calendar and so are the rest of us. Because when he's not scheduled he is moving, talking, asking for play dates, making his own activities, etc. He doesn't need nor want quiet time. So lots of activities is a good thing.

I sometimes hear about families content to do nothing all weekend and cannot understand that lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

I didn't say that this was an issue for me, im participating in a thread about overscheduling.

The prior PP is right about not knowing what's going on and wrongly assuming its over scheduling. In my neighborhood very few kids are around in the afternoons because a lot of them are in aftercare, which is just a big block of unstructured play. So, hooray, not need to lament the future of our children!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

This is fun for some kids. If you have multiple kids figure it out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

This is fun for some kids. If you have multiple kids figure it out

Figure what out? You think you know best for every family and every kid in your neighborhood? Why are you so obsessed with everyone? Creepy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

I didn't say that this was an issue for me, im participating in a thread about overscheduling.

And yet nobody has defined overscheduling to be anything other than if the unscheduled kid has nobody to play with then everyone else is suffering from “overscheduling”. How many hours and activities is too much according to you? Be specific.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over scheduling is good for most American parents because if they had to quietly sit with their spouse and kids you know they would go crazy.

None of this comes across as very genuine. Why do people care what other parents do with their spare time? It’s like the redshirting debate. They care because they fear their own kids are missing out, will be left behind in the dust, or that playmates can’t entertain their own bored kids giving them the downtime they, the parents want, but refuse to pay for or drive their kids to. Figure out how to entertain your bored kids without trying to drag everyone else down.

It’s hard to give kids a normal childhood when all the other kids around them aren’t around. This is not about giving myself downtime.

+1

Everyone can make their own choices and that's what's happening, obviously. No one is trying to pass some kind of ban on kid activities. People are also pointing out that yes this impacts the overall vibe and feel of a neighborhood, whether kids are available for unplanned play, etc. That is true and the comparison to redshirting is apt - there are impacts on other kids.

I don't see why anyone is denying that. You can still make whatever decisions are best for your family. No one is forcing you to take this other stuff into account.

It’s so obvious this faux concern was always about other people not knowing how to entertain their own kids and wanting free babysitting or entertianment. They are bragging that unscheduled kids are more creative and can handle boredom but that doesn’t really ring true. Just give your bored kids a book and move on. If another kid wants to dance or play the cello it’s not your business.

It's genuinely fascinating to see someone who sees people wanting their kids to have unstructured play and thinks they're trying to score free babysitting. If can't imagine how you survive with such a dismal view of the world.

Nobody is stopping your kid from unstructured play. Nobody cares what your kid is doing, it is you trying to bend everyone else to your will.

What is so wrong with unstructured play?

What is so wrong with a kid who likes to do other things? Open the door and let your kids run free. Why do you spend so much time talking about it?

Nothing is wrong with a kid who likes other things, but, imo, they need free time and free play. Just like you most likely think thet need activities

You have no idea what’s going on in other homes. Probably those kids have siblings and have plenty of play time. How many kids do you have that this is such an issue for you?

I didn't say that this was an issue for me, im participating in a thread about overscheduling.

And yet nobody has defined overscheduling to be anything other than if the unscheduled kid has nobody to play with then everyone else is suffering from “overscheduling”. How many hours and activities is too much according to you? Be specific.

I have the opposite feeling. I wonder why a parent would not want to let their child try something new whether that be ice hockey or ballet or swim.

We are on the upper end of achieving as a family. We work hard and play hard. We know many people who don’t work that hard or maybe just unsuccessful, don’t try hard and don’t do much at all. Shrug. They probably look at us and don’t envy us either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who are like this tend to have hyper kids that are hard to be around. Non-hyper kids don’t need this level of entertainment at all times and the parents need fewer breaks from them too.

While I disagree with your delivery, I do agree that my ADHD extroverted kid is happiest with a booked calendar and so are the rest of us. Because when he's not scheduled he is moving, talking, asking for play dates, making his own activities, etc. He doesn't need nor want quiet time. So lots of activities is a good thing.

I sometimes hear about families content to do nothing all weekend and cannot understand that lifestyle.

I have a friend who prides herself on family time. They all spend time on their screens. The kids have no time limit on screens. Boy plays video games all weekend. Daughter watches YouTube. One kid is a good student. One kid is not. She just lets them be.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who are like this tend to have hyper kids that are hard to be around. Non-hyper kids don’t need this level of entertainment at all times and the parents need fewer breaks from them too.

While I disagree with your delivery, I do agree that my ADHD extroverted kid is happiest with a booked calendar and so are the rest of us. Because when he's not scheduled he is moving, talking, asking for play dates, making his own activities, etc. He doesn't need nor want quiet time. So lots of activities is a good thing.

I sometimes hear about families content to do nothing all weekend and cannot understand that lifestyle.

I have a friend who prides herself on family time. They all spend time on their screens. The kids have no time limit on screens. Boy plays video games all weekend. Daughter watches YouTube. One kid is a good student. One kid is not. She just lets them be.

kids are bums

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who are like this tend to have hyper kids that are hard to be around. Non-hyper kids don’t need this level of entertainment at all times and the parents need fewer breaks from them too.

While I disagree with your delivery, I do agree that my ADHD extroverted kid is happiest with a booked calendar and so are the rest of us. Because when he's not scheduled he is moving, talking, asking for play dates, making his own activities, etc. He doesn't need nor want quiet time. So lots of activities is a good thing.

I sometimes hear about families content to do nothing all weekend and cannot understand that lifestyle.

I have a friend who prides herself on family time. They all spend time on their screens. The kids have no time limit on screens. Boy plays video games all weekend. Daughter watches YouTube. One kid is a good student. One kid is not. She just lets them be.

These parents need to parent and kick them off screens and kick them outside.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who are like this tend to have hyper kids that are hard to be around. Non-hyper kids don’t need this level of entertainment at all times and the parents need fewer breaks from them too.

While I disagree with your delivery, I do agree that my ADHD extroverted kid is happiest with a booked calendar and so are the rest of us. Because when he's not scheduled he is moving, talking, asking for play dates, making his own activities, etc. He doesn't need nor want quiet time. So lots of activities is a good thing.

I sometimes hear about families content to do nothing all weekend and cannot understand that lifestyle.

I have a friend who prides herself on family time. They all spend time on their screens. The kids have no time limit on screens. Boy plays video games all weekend. Daughter watches YouTube. One kid is a good student. One kid is not. She just lets them be.

These parents need to parent and kick them off screens and kick them outside.

That family also often criticizes people for being over scheduled.