What’s the worst thing another mother ever said to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My MIL is mentally sick but I didn't know at that time. After I had DS1, she came over to see him and told me he has hydranencephaly and will die soon. She was a nurse so I believed her. I was a hormonal mess too and I remember calling the pediatrician hysterically.

Please start a thread and tell us more stories about her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was having a major meltdown on the metro after work one day, and a pregnant woman looked at me and said, “my child will never behave like that.”

It had been a bad day, after a bad week, and I was exhausted.

The exact same thing happened to me. At that point I’ve already decided to drop my filters with perfect strangers. I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

That’s hilarious. I appreciate you. People on metro are often intolerant dicks. Even the pregnant ladies. I hope she didn’t swallow too many flies and learned her lesson (though I doubt it).

So you are an actual a hole then. Not only do you let your kid bother other riders on a train but then you hurl deeply offensive insults at the strangers that you were already bothering. What a jerk.

I don’t have filters with strangers either so if the kid is being an out of control monster then I will say so. Don’t like it? Keep your own kids to themselves then.

+1

[Anonymous]

This came from my OB:

When I went to my first OB appointment upon realizing I was pregnant, I told my OB I had just come back from vacation and had been in a hot tub. She told me that wasn't a good idea and said, 'no more hot tubs where you are cooking your baby'. For the rest of my pregnancy, I worried I'd given my baby horrible brain damage or something for 'cooking my baby'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was having a major meltdown on the metro after work one day, and a pregnant woman looked at me and said, “my child will never behave like that.”

It had been a bad day, after a bad week, and I was exhausted.

The exact same thing happened to me. At that point I’ve already decided to drop my filters with perfect strangers. I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

That’s hilarious. I appreciate you. People on metro are often intolerant dicks. Even the pregnant ladies. I hope she didn’t swallow too many flies and learned her lesson (though I doubt it).

So you are an actual a hole then. Not only do you let your kid bother other riders on a train but then you hurl deeply offensive insults at the strangers that you were already bothering. What a jerk.

I don’t have filters with strangers either so if the kid is being an out of control monster then I will say so. Don’t like it? Keep your own kids to themselves then.

That is a horrible thing to say to someone. I mean, I'm not against fighting fire with fire but this is just unnecessarily cruel.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was having a major meltdown on the metro after work one day, and a pregnant woman looked at me and said, “my child will never behave like that.”

It had been a bad day, after a bad week, and I was exhausted.

The exact same thing happened to me. At that point I’ve already decided to drop my filters with perfect strangers. I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

That’s hilarious. I appreciate you. People on metro are often intolerant dicks. Even the pregnant ladies. I hope she didn’t swallow too many flies and learned her lesson (though I doubt it).

So you are an actual a hole then. Not only do you let your kid bother other riders on a train but then you hurl deeply offensive insults at the strangers that you were already bothering. What a jerk.

I don’t have filters with strangers either so if the kid is being an out of control monster then I will say so. Don’t like it? Keep your own kids to themselves then.

That is a horrible thing to say to someone. I mean, I'm not against fighting fire with fire but this is just unnecessarily cruel.

People who make mean comments to others shouldn’t be surprised if they get it back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was having a major meltdown on the metro after work one day, and a pregnant woman looked at me and said, “my child will never behave like that.”

It had been a bad day, after a bad week, and I was exhausted.

The exact same thing happened to me. At that point I’ve already decided to drop my filters with perfect strangers. I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

That’s hilarious. I appreciate you. People on metro are often intolerant dicks. Even the pregnant ladies. I hope she didn’t swallow too many flies and learned her lesson (though I doubt it).

So you are an actual a hole then. Not only do you let your kid bother other riders on a train but then you hurl deeply offensive insults at the strangers that you were already bothering. What a jerk.

I don’t have filters with strangers either so if the kid is being an out of control monster then I will say so. Don’t like it? Keep your own kids to themselves then.

That is a horrible thing to say to someone. I mean, I'm not against fighting fire with fire but this is just unnecessarily cruel.

People who make mean comments to others shouldn’t be surprised if they get it back.

yeah, people like that count on everyone else being polite. They're just "calling it like it is," but anyone who calls them on it is awful. The actual insults that the PP "hurled" was that the woman was cocky. Which is 100 percent accurate.

[Anonymous]

I was referring to this comment (I am not sure I'm a fan of the stacked comments);

I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

^^saying that you think a pregnant women could still have a stillborn is cruel. I can't imagine anyone saying that in real life.

[Anonymous]

Nothing.
I guess saying it's a demon child. Knowing that I was their aunt taking care of her for the week. Blame the parents, not the kids for the lack of dicipline

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was referring to this comment (I am not sure I'm a fan of the stacked comments);

I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

^^saying that you think a pregnant women could still have a stillborn is cruel. I can't imagine anyone saying that in real life.

Bet she’ll think twice before giving her unsolicited opinion to a stranger though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son was having a major meltdown on the metro after work one day, and a pregnant woman looked at me and said, “my child will never behave like that.”

It had been a bad day, after a bad week, and I was exhausted.

The exact same thing happened to me. At that point I’ve already decided to drop my filters with perfect strangers. I told her she may yet have a stillborn so let’s not get cocky. She almost sat down. I told her it would teach her to stop saying stupid shit to complete strangers and exited.

That’s hilarious. I appreciate you. People on metro are often intolerant dicks. Even the pregnant ladies. I hope she didn’t swallow too many flies and learned her lesson (though I doubt it).

So you are an actual a hole then. Not only do you let your kid bother other riders on a train but then you hurl deeply offensive insults at the strangers that you were already bothering. What a jerk.

I don’t have filters with strangers either so if the kid is being an out of control monster then I will say so. Don’t like it? Keep your own kids to themselves then.

If my kid is kicking you or screaming in your ear, I'm happy to restrain and discipline him. But if you're letting your not-yet-FTM arrogance run with "my child would NEVER!" bullshit, then I'm happy to smack that down.

[Anonymous]

I don't really have a "worst" as when other mothers say rude things to me, I usually just write that person off as a valid source of input. However, my main pet peeve is when people will draw conclusions about kids (or parenting) based on really limited interactions with us.

Like a mom once called my then-3yo "high maintenance" because she kept wanting me to play on the playground with her instead of playing with other kids. It was small but I remember thinking it's a weird thing to say after interacting with a kid for like an hour. I mean, my DD was 100% being high maintenance that day, but I don't consider her higher maintenance than other kids in general.

Around the same time, I remember we were leaving a playground after meeting up with a few families for a playdate, and my kid started crying when we left because she hadn't had a chance to play with a specific friend during the playdate. As we were leaving, one of the other moms turned to me and said "Oh wow, is she always like this?" It was such a weird thing to say. Like if the answer were yes (thankfully it is not), well it just comes off as incredibly judgmental. And alternatively, it's a one off (3yo kids sometimes struggle with transitions and cry, shocking I know) and it's, well, still very judgmental.

Anyway, kids are learning all the time and in the process of learning, they will act in imperfect ways. Heck, as a parent I'm also learning and I've made mistakes and learned from them too. The weird judgment is ridiculous because it indicates that you think children should just instantly acquire complex social skills and emotional regulation that usually take years to acquire (and that some adult still don't have).

These are shocking or terrible, but I've found there's just always a low level of judgment and superiority among certain parents (not just moms) and taken together it's a big exhausting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My MIL is mentally sick but I didn't know at that time. After I had DS1, she came over to see him and told me he has hydranencephaly and will die soon. She was a nurse so I believed her. I was a hormonal mess too and I remember calling the pediatrician hysterically.

Please start a thread and tell us more stories about her.

She's bipolar i.e. "quirky" in her words and unmedicated. My FIL stayed until my H, the youngest, finished college and then ran for the hills. It's a sad situation and heartbreaking for my H. But yes, I have stories, from trying to kidnap our DC1, to suicides attempts, to burning FIL's 2nd wife's clothes.

[Anonymous]

A wealthy SAHM friend once said to me "Could you take the summer off one year? I would just love you to experience that with your kids. You know- just be a regular mom." We are in no financial position to do that and it made me feel terrible.

Same friend also said "It makes me so sad for you that you had to have 2 c-sections. Birth was such a defining experience for me. I hate that you were robbed of that. I can't imagine."

[Anonymous]

"Why isn't your child dressed more warmly?" Yes, he was underdressed for the chilly day. Yes, I told him to dress more warmly. No, he wasn't cold, because I asked him repeatedly.

And I'm a dad, so it's a mix of condescending criticism like that, because obviously dads are idiots, and the over-the-top compliments for basically just being there, because, Wow! A dad taking care of his kids!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Why isn't your child dressed more warmly?" Yes, he was underdressed for the chilly day. Yes, I told him to dress more warmly. No, he wasn't cold, because I asked him repeatedly.

And I'm a dad, so it's a mix of condescending criticism like that, because obviously dads are idiots, and the over-the-top compliments for basically just being there, because, Wow! A dad taking care of his kids!

LOL be grateful you've never encountered Russian grandmas. Every time you leave the house with a small child, there's like a platoon of them outside interrogating everyone on where is the baby's hat and socks and scarf why is his neck showing he must be hungry/cold/bothered....all to complete strangers Americans are downright gentle after that treatment to me....