Spouse Wants to Send DD to a Camp that Costs an Entire Month's Take Home Pay

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

and plenty of nature. I’m very aware that it costs more than camp, trust me. But if you prioritize that for your kids and have the resources then why would camp be the “only” place for these activities.

Wut are you talking about? Where are these mythical screenless schools? Are we talking Amish country?

What are you talking about? My kids’ school uses screens for computer class, like if they need to code or keyboard. Like many other independent schools in the area they have the kids outdoors for projects regularly. All these independent schools have campuses with woods, streams, places to do rope courses or whatever. Why would people pay extra money to put their kids on cheap educational apps and YouTube?

PP implied his kid's private school has no screens. Which is an odd brag.

[Anonymous]

All these independent schools have campuses with woods, streams, places to do rope courses or whatever.

Ahhh, nope.

[Anonymous]

At the end of the day it's pointless to debate whether these camps are "worth it." Clearly kids can grown up and live prosperous well adjusted lives without going to such camps. Clearly some folks attended and created memories they still cherish. This is like debating if a Mercedes Benz is "worth it" or attending an Ivy League School.

The question is can they afford it? If yes, then consider did OP's wife give in to him buying a new sportscar last year? If yes, maybe he should listen to her now. Or, did the wife rule out a trip to Europe last year because she didn't think it was "worth it." If yes, maybe she should let him have his way on this one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some people here claim those camps are "life changing expierences". Such an nonsense! They will be fun but spending a few weeks away from home with the same socio-economic group as they have at home in a well protected 24-hour camp offering accommodation and fitting is not "life changing".

This right here. I've had prior conversations with friends about the "life changing experiences" of camp, or how camp girls turn out to be successful, resourceful, independent girls. My response is that the summer camp cohort are usually white, wealthy kids from affluent areas, who grow up with not only expensive summer camps but all the benefits that family wealth affords (private school, education, fully funded college, family vacations, tutors, etc.). The default setting for these kids is success. Summer camp is not what pushes them over the finish line. If you can afford summer camp, great, but you shouldn't sacrifice anything to pay for summer camp.

To me it was like being in a sorority but with kids from all over the country and doing outdoor things. A lot of girls do not get outside that much and it was fun to bond with girls who enjoyed it and try new things. I also liked all the team building activities and the talks late at night and the independence away from family. I was a shy child and it helped me get out of my shell and meet people with varied interests. I think all of it helped prepare me for adult friendships and college. I probably spent on average two weeks of camp a year from age 9-14 for a total of 12 weeks. A little goes a long way. Kids who spent more time away I think might have missed out on some summer stuff at home or traveling with family but got more out of camp. I'm not sure what being at camp more than one month gives you. One month is plenty of time to be away. Less than two weeks doesn't really give you that time away from home feeling.

[Anonymous]

Previous PP. One year I went to a New England camp with a family friend who lived up there. I didn't like it as much. Most of the kids were from that area and I was in Virginia. We didn't keep in touch although the activities were great at the camp. I think it's nicer when you go to a camp somewhat near your home with the ability to keep in touch with other kids you meet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Previous PP. One year I went to a New England camp with a family friend who lived up there. I didn't like it as much. Most of the kids were from that area and I was in Virginia. We didn't keep in touch although the activities were great at the camp. I think it's nicer when you go to a camp somewhat near your home with the ability to keep in touch with other kids you meet.

I face time with my DH last night. He's in Dubai on travel.

There is no issue keeping in touch anymore thanks to the internet. It wasn't like it was in the 80s where if you met a boy at the beach he may as well disspaera into thin air when you say goodbye.

[Anonymous]

Can any experienced camp parents share thoughts on what percentage of sleep away campers come from private schools? Is this common for kids in top rated publics or more rarified?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can any experienced camp parents share thoughts on what percentage of sleep away campers come from private schools? Is this common for kids in top rated publics or more rarified?

My son goes to an expensive camp and I have zero idea. I'm sure he doesn't know either. He knows where a couple of kids are from, ie, the state name. There are kids with flashy families (one of his bunkmates has famous parents), but he is friends with the kids he likes who share his interests. Camp is an equalizer. You're in the same bunk wearing t-shirts and shorts and doing the same stuff all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And claims I'm being unreasonable to say no.

Is it like space camp for her career or a bespoke high level sports camp? Or just outdoor nature in the mountains with rich kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can any experienced camp parents share thoughts on what percentage of sleep away campers come from private schools? Is this common for kids in top rated publics or more rarified?

My son goes to an expensive camp and I have zero idea. I'm sure he doesn't know either. He knows where a couple of kids are from, ie, the state name. There are kids with flashy families (one of his bunkmates has famous parents), but he is friends with the kids he likes who share his interests. Camp is an equalizer. You're in the same bunk wearing t-shirts and shorts and doing the same stuff all day.

Lol. If you already know the parents’ names, wealth and career who cares if the kid is at boarding school, private school, Jewish school or public?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those camps are extreme luxuries that people somehow think are part of an American child's summer.

We have too many sports things to use what’s left of summer for non family travel. Day camps around here have a ton of good options too; we are lucky. So many summer friends, things to do and job options for older teens as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I never had kids and I had no idea this was even a thing. I remember going to Ranger Rick camp for like a week when I was a kid but it was pretty low-key and had to have been inexpensive.

People spend a month’s pay on camp? Wow. Well, it must be an amazing experience for the kids. I’m not knocking it at all, just surprised this is a thing.

Sleep away camp is a big thing in New England. My kids started doing 4 weeks at 8. It is their favorite place on earth, they stayed on as counselors into college, and I think there is a decent shot that at least one of them gets married at the camp in a few years. (They so lovely weddings in the Fall.)

Links please. I want to see what my kids are missing.

Are we talking about the annual Jewish hebrew 2-4 week camps everyone does or secular non denominational sleepover camps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is normal in the Northeast. Middle and upper middle class families do this with their kids, and it wasn’t a cheapie Y or 4H camp. These are full service places with a wide variety of activities and facilities. My kid is a homebody, or else I would have packed his trunk and put him on the bus several years ago.

I remember my friend was the summer waterski instructor at a Vermont camp. All the counselors were hooking up or worse.

[Anonymous]

Didn’t read the thread but not worth it if it’s a financial stretch. Like soooo not worth it. I grew up doing all those things. Doesn’t matter to me one iota now.

[Anonymous]

Also I am the PP- sometimes kids especially girls can be very cliquey and snobby at those camps. Granted my experience is like 30 years ago but fwiw I’d hate for you to stretch to send your kid to a camp and they not enjoy it.