What age should a adult child move out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC just graduated in May. DCs job only pays $70k a year and apartments are expensive. It does put a damper on his social life. He would like to have his own place but it's takes some financial preparation. Patience all around.

All the the UVA grads we know that went to NYC, DC or SF get a 2 BR and out up a $600 insta-drywall panels to split the LR into Br 3 and have 3 roommates. They all work a lot and go out a lot. And save their bonuses or use those for paying off student loans.
$70k is great for managing money and living within your means. True a $2500 1 BR is off limits in gallery place but you can get things to &759-1000 pp in a variety of ways.
I feel sorry for those snowflakes. I really don’t work with anyone that lives w with parents or family in their 20s and 20-something’s are over half of my employer’s 300 person employee base.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Two weeks after high school graduation.

fall following their June Hs graduation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son is also 24. He graduated from college in Dec 2019 and we suggested he live at home for a year and see where his social life was compared to his job. Plus, he could save some money. We said he could if he put $3k a month into a savings plan- over and above the 15% he is putting into his 401k. Covid hit and he is still living at home. He works here too as and not had much of a social life since Covid. We have set next June as a target date for moving out. He is still working from home, but I expect that to change in Jan. A bonus of Covid for him is that he has saved more than the $3k month. He just got a promotion and last Jan started a Masters through his employer - online first as a result of Covid. So, he should be set.

I am glad he did not have an apartment from the get go because he would be alone in it and working from home alone.

Do your neighbors know how old he is? The main reason I want him to move out is because I just don't know what our neighbors are thinking.... I am pretty sure they are asking himself why is Andy still living at home when he graduated college etc...

?? Where are you living? We live in DMV and I know many well-to-do people who are from other cultures and they are fairly comfortable with their adult kids living with them. I guess the main difference is that their children ae making 6 figure salaries, so no one feels that they have not launched.

We're in McLean. Our neighbors have all three of their now college graduate kids living at home again, for various reasons. They are all smart, nice, young adults who don't seem to have "failed to launch" in any way. They just like their parents and have various reasons for being there again. They will leave soon enough, I'm sure the parents don't need to rush them. For the record, I didn't think anything of it one way or the other--why would i?

Is this just a Covid safety and work remotely thing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does he actually have money to rent a place, pay other bills, and not struggle?

The DMV area is so expensive for a one-income person. I know before I got married, I moved back in with my parents from ages 26-29 because I was sick of dealing with roommates and simply couldn't afford a place on my own.

I'm 33 and have a ton of single friends who still live with their parents. They are saving up to do a down payment on a house and are paying down student loans in the meantime. None of us think anything of it? It's just pretty normal in our circle and age group.

I don’t know anyone who did this but I’m a little older than you? I’m curious how it works, though. Are you comfortable bringing back a boyfriend/girlfriend and having sex? Or lounging around in your underwear and watching movies with them on a Saturday morning? What about cooking a meal at 11pm? I’m thinking of things my boyfriends and I would do in our 20s and my parents would not have been happy! Maybe your parents are chill, but I do feel weird having sex in my parents’ home.

I had sex in my parents house if I knew they would not be home. Not while they were home. We had car sex too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Does he actually have money to rent a place, pay other bills, and not struggle?

The DMV area is so expensive for a one-income person. I know before I got married, I moved back in with my parents from ages 26-29 because I was sick of dealing with roommates and simply couldn't afford a place on my own.

I'm 33 and have a ton of single friends who still live with their parents. They are saving up to do a down payment on a house and are paying down student loans in the meantime. None of us think anything of it? It's just pretty normal in our circle and age group.

I don’t know anyone who did this but I’m a little older than you? I’m curious how it works, though. Are you comfortable bringing back a boyfriend/girlfriend and having sex? Or lounging around in your underwear and watching movies with them on a Saturday morning? What about cooking a meal at 11pm? I’m thinking of things my boyfriends and I would do in our 20s and my parents would not have been happy! Maybe your parents are chill, but I do feel weird having sex in my parents’ home.

I had sex in my parents house if I knew they would not be home. Not while they were home. We had car sex too.

And cooking at night was not a big deal.

[Anonymous]

I have several friends with adult children ranging from 25-33 still living at home.

They're not saving money. They're not paying off student loans (they didn't get any).

They're enjoying life as children. Mom and Dad pay for their shelter, food, heat/AC, car, insurance, cell phone, travel....

One friend actually paused during a dinner out to transfer $100 to her 29 y/o son's bank account so he could pay for a date. The son works full time, but somehow didn't have $100 in his bank account.

It's enabling, and it's damaging.

[Anonymous]

AT what age.
And 22, or sooner if they decline college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My son is also 24. He graduated from college in Dec 2019 and we suggested he live at home for a year and see where his social life was compared to his job. Plus, he could save some money. We said he could if he put $3k a month into a savings plan- over and above the 15% he is putting into his 401k. Covid hit and he is still living at home. He works here too as and not had much of a social life since Covid. We have set next June as a target date for moving out. He is still working from home, but I expect that to change in Jan. A bonus of Covid for him is that he has saved more than the $3k month. He just got a promotion and last Jan started a Masters through his employer - online first as a result of Covid. So, he should be set.

I am glad he did not have an apartment from the get go because he would be alone in it and working from home alone.

Do your neighbors know how old he is? The main reason I want him to move out is because I just don't know what our neighbors are thinking.... I am pretty sure they are asking himself why is Andy still living at home when he graduated college etc...

?? Where are you living? We live in DMV and I know many well-to-do people who are from other cultures and they are fairly comfortable with their adult kids living with them. I guess the main difference is that their children ae making 6 figure salaries, so no one feels that they have not launched.

We're in McLean. Our neighbors have all three of their now college graduate kids living at home again, for various reasons. They are all smart, nice, young adults who don't seem to have "failed to launch" in any way. They just like their parents and have various reasons for being there again. They will leave soon enough, I'm sure the parents don't need to rush them. For the record, I didn't think anything of it one way or the other--why would i?

Is this just a Covid safety and work remotely thing?

I am a different poster from the pp, but also live in McLean. It is not really covid safety, but they are WFH and who wants to WFH alone in an apartment and then be alone at night. One was WFH for west coast FAANG in, he left in Sept after more than a year at home. The others are WFH but with local companies. I expect most will move out by next June.

[Anonymous]

I expect our kids will spend at least part of summers in and out of our house after they start college and/or grad school. But, once you’re done with your studies, it’s time to move out and start your adult life. It’s part of the maturation process to leave the nest and strike out on your own. The people I know who loves with their parents after school were immature, came from a overbearing family, or both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:normal people live with their families because they want to. they move when they start their own families. the whole idea that you must live alone or with roommates for a while is a costly illusion. the financial cost of it is the least of the problem.

Welcome to the Old Country

Where you never go to school or work more than an hour from your family of origin.

Right. The living at home idea presupposes that your job is close enough to the family home to make the arrangement viable. That greatly limits your employment options. Americans are typically more mobile in their lives than people in other countries. So, if the cultural expectation is that you’ll live at the family home until you marry, you’re going to have fewer educational and career options.

My parents live in Naples, Florida. It’s a nice town, but the career and educational options within a reasonable commute are pretty limited. During my educational and professional life, I’ve lived in Michigan, New York, California and now the DC area. For my education and career, living with my parents would have been a terriblr idea.

[Anonymous]

Update!!!
He signed a lease and will be moving out on December 1st!
We did help with the first month rent, but he will be moving out in 6 days !!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Update!!!
He signed a lease and will be moving out on December 1st!
We did help with the first month rent, but he will be moving out in 6 days !!

Congratulations! This is really for the best

[Anonymous]

In my culture it's common (expected) to live at home until marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Never, in the case of my grandfathers. They lived in rural Virginia, were the youngest sons, married and brought their wives into the family home. In exchange for the property and help with childcare, they took care of their parents in their old age. Win, win.

Sucks for the wives! Thank god times have changed!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Update!!!
He signed a lease and will be moving out on December 1st!
We did help with the first month rent, but he will be moving out in 6 days !!

Congratulations on his launching!