Surrogacy help

[Anonymous]

We are in a somewhat unique situation, and would be curious as to folks' thoughts/advice/ideas. After having one child (through IVF due to being older and some health problems), we pursued IVF one final time, and like the first time around, we only ended up with one viable embryo after several rounds of IVF and embryo testing. The embryo has been frozen now for a couple years to wait and see if my wife would be able to carry again, but her health problems are not going to allow that unfortunately.

So we are exploring surrogacy. Our situation is pretty unique from what I can tell because we are not looking to keep trying, creating more embryos, etc. We just have this one embryo that we want to transfer. Going through the traditional surrogacy agencies seems excessive for our situation, both in terms of money and just the type of services they typically provide.

Obviously we would love to find an "altruistic" surrogate (who we would still pay obviously), but we have exhausted our family and friend network with no luck so far. So as noted, just wanted to see if anyone has been through a similar situation and/or can give ideas on options that maybe we haven't thought about. Thanks in advance.

[Anonymous]

I think your situation is a pretty standard surrogacy request: You’re looking for someone to carry the pregnancy.
It sounds like the only difference here is that you only want to try transfer once, yes?

[Anonymous]

Nothing better than commercializing babies and exploiting women for other women’s desires.

[Anonymous]

Op, did I read that you have a child?

[Anonymous]

Yes to responses 2 and 5. LOL at responses 3 and 4.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes to responses 2 and 5. LOL at responses 3 and 4.

What is lol about that?

[Anonymous]

This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes to responses 2 and 5. LOL at responses 3 and 4.

Lol at 1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

You can’t see the issue of commoditizing babies? You seriously don’t see the ethics issue with that? Are you that obtuse?
Watch the world burn? What are you talking about? Are you medicating?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

I mean, no, there are many people who don’t want to “help someone else start a family” for any reason. It is bizarre and that you can’t understand why many would not want to use their body to do so. You may do it, but many others may not want to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

You can’t see the issue of commoditizing babies? You seriously don’t see the ethics issue with that? Are you that obtuse?
Watch the world burn? What are you talking about? Are you medicating?

OK, got for it. I will give you a brief audience. Tell me why you think my situation is "commoditizing babies." This should be good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

Desperate woman.

[Anonymous]

Sorry I am confused - how is your situation unique?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This seems like a typical request you’d use an agency for.

Is it? OK, that is helpful to know if true. Just seems like most things I read are about people going to agencies to either have the surrogate help them create a baby, or have them work with IVF places to get pregnant (i.e., continue to go through IVF process). We literally only have one embryo to transfer and that is it -- no more IVF, etc. In any event, helpful to know, thanks.

As for the peanut gallery, reading about people taking issue surrogacy on here is one of the more bizarre things I see. I get the problems with forced surrogacy overseas, but I can't for the life of me see how someone could take issue with someone want to help someone else start a family when they are unable to for health reasons. But obviously many must like to troll and/or watch the world burn. It is at least good entertainment reading the responses, so I appreciate that part of it.

Desperate woman.

Wait, do you think I am a woman? Ha, that makes these responses even better.