Twins and Birthday Party invites

[Anonymous]

My daughter has a birthday party coming up. We did an all class invite. One of her classmates is a twin. Twin is in another class and was not invited.My daughter is not really close to either twin but wanted to invite the whole class. She knows of the twin and occasionally they interact at recess. Their parent RSVP’d that both girls would be attending. Is this reasonable?

[Anonymous]

I would have invited both.

[Anonymous]

Depends on the age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would have invited both.

Why? Not really friends with either and the sibling isn’t in the same class. Do you invite the siblings of all your kid”s acquaintances?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the age.

What age would be the cutoff?

[Anonymous]

Seems strange.

[Anonymous]

It’s rude, but honestly par for the course with a lot of twin moms, for whom social conventions seem to go out the window due to their #twinmom status.

I would probably let it go if you have space, especially since you are having an all class party anyway. But if you don’t have the space or it’s not in your budget, it’s okay to write back and say sorry, we can’t accommodate siblings due to space.

[Anonymous]

Triplet mom and I would never bring the other 2 unless directly invited. (Though when we are hosting, I do always specifically include twins/triplets on the invitations)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depends on the age.

What age would be the cutoff?

I'm a twin dad. You need to invite both up until about 1st grade, maybe 2nd grade. By first grade, they should start to have their own group of friends and should start to understand (or their parents need to teach) that one twin being invited does not include the other twin. I'm with triplet mom. I would never bring my twin or RSVP for both unless both were invited.

I, personally, would extend higher, like about age 8 and grade 2, but after first grade, I would say that the second twin need not be invited.

For the mother who RSVPed for both, if there are limited slots or you are at a venue where additional children cost extra, it is okay to respond that Larla was invited, but siblings are not included.

[Anonymous]

No. I have twins and if only one is invited, only that one will go.

It can be tricky sometimes when the invitation comes to my email, with no children’s names on it, in which case I just clarify that the child in the class with the birthday kid will attend. Sometimes then the parent will reach out to say both are invited.

[Anonymous]

I had this situation for my dd’s bday last month except we weren’t inviting the whole class. She invited 8 girls from across the grade who are her friends and one of the girls is a twin and the twin sister is not a friend of my dd’s. Since this is first grade I just decided to invite both twins to avoid any issues with the girls or the mom.

If the twin was a boy I would have not invited the twin. In your situation OP I would let it slide, what’s one extra kid.

[Anonymous]

Bop

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I have twins and if only one is invited, only that one will go.

It can be tricky sometimes when the invitation comes to my email, with no children’s names on it, in which case I just clarify that the child in the class with the birthday kid will attend. Sometimes then the parent will reach out to say both are invited.

Another twin parent here and I second all of this. It really helps if the invitation is clear about who is invited, but I would never assume that both were invited or add one who wasn't explicitly invited. A lot of times parents invite both though, which is really nice (but not necessary).

[Anonymous]

What age, OP?

[Anonymous]

7 and under probably include both twins.

I had 3 sets of twins in my kid’s class last year. 1 only brought the invited twin. 1 brought both twins. 1 didn’t rsvp and didn’t come. I also had parents bring siblings. I think 4-5 people brought a sibling. It was kind of annoying. Oh well.