Raising a Jewish kid with one Jewish/one atheist parent

[Anonymous]

Has anyone done this, and if so, what did it look like? I (the DW) am an agnostic Jew, not a big religion person but strong connection to Israel and grew up going to Jewish camps and school. DH was raised Catholic and is now atheist with no connection to Christianity. He is fine with having a Jewish child but is not interested in converting, which is completely fine with me. What are things I can do to raise a child with a strong connection to Judaism without forcing DH to be something he is not? Some ideas:
-Teach Hebrew at a young age (DH learned Hebrew so he could participate in this as well)
-Shabbat dinner - we have done this quite a bit with my family anyway and some wine and challah are not objectionable to anyone!
-Trips to Israel (DH has been several times with me already)
-Jewish summer camp - will they take kids who don't go to synagogue?

I feel like that's not "enough" but don't want this to be onerous and also want to respect DH's choice to not participate in all of these things that he never asked to be involved in.

[Anonymous]

Is there a reason you wouldn't consider a Jewish school, Hebrew school, or involvement with a synagogue?

You could go with just your child(ren).

[Anonymous]

You’re an agnostic Jew. You’re not religious. What’s the problem? Your husband is probably more ingrained with religion as you are.

[Anonymous]

What does it mean to you to be Jewish? I would start there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re an agnostic Jew. You’re not religious. What’s the problem? Your husband is probably more ingrained with religion as you are.

To answer both you and the poster after you, Judaism isn't really a religion for me. It is my heritage and my blood. So I feel like my short list above may not be enough to give a child that same sense of heritage and connection.

[Anonymous]

I would be realistic about your child’s willingness to feel a strong attachment to Judaism. Ultimately it will be his choice. I know many people with two Jewish parents for whom this is not a large part of their lives, and they don’t feel they are missing out. You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink. Particularly as you yourself don’t belief, and married out.

[Anonymous]

There is no such thing as Jewish blood OP. Our blood is the same. You may “ feel Jewish” but what does that mean to you?
If it’s your heritage then teach him about that as you talk about family, customs etc.

[Anonymous]

Consider joining https://iffp.org/. Even though one parent is atheist. They have something for everyone there.

[Anonymous]

Are you willing to join a shul and send him to religious school once or twice a week? If not and you are really looking for secular connection, your list seems pretty good. Especially summer camps.

[Anonymous]

You chose to be less Jewish than your parents.

Your child will be less Jewish than you, unless your child is inspired by something outside your family.

https://www.baltimoresecularjews.org/

[Anonymous]

I join a reform synagogue and I think it's fine for your situation fwiw.

What you suggest is also ok. Are the grandparents around - ever want to go to synagogue with them if you don't want to join? Or you can also occasionally go to Chabad.

Judaism basically aligns with positive psychology:
https://reformjudaism.org/how-judaism-and-positive-psychology-make-excellent-bedfellows

The URJ camps take kids who don't belong to synagogue.

[Anonymous]

Oh and you should totally subscribe to PJ Library. Have you heard of it?

[Anonymous]

I would consider joining Machar (www.Machar.org) which is focused on Jewish culture.

[Anonymous]

I am the non-Jew in this scenario and the mom! It’s not been hard at all. We do holidays, talk about being Jewish and family history, and are preparing for the bar mitzvah. We still do Christmas to the hilt but that seems to make no difference for my kid’s Jewish identity

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh and you should totally subscribe to PJ Library. Have you heard of it?

My neice and nephew get their books - I've read about half to them. They're very sweet.