Inconsiderate visiting family
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Anonymous
| My DH's family is coming here for THanksgiving. His brother and his family (6 people total) are staying at our house. His brother's wife emailed us their flight itinerary and they arrive at DCA at 11:15pm Wednesday. She wrote only "Can you pick us up"? My DH does not want to confront her or his brother over this, but it is upsetting me that they are so inconsiderate. Now my DH will be exhausted on thanksgiving, plus they'll likely wake up the whole house when they arrive. I really want to text her "how about you take a taxi" but she'll probably take offense. This is in line with her pattern of inconsiderate behavior. What can I do? |
Anonymous
| I just opened some popcorn, so please keep us posted. |
Anonymous
You can either speak up and say no, please Uber/taxi and pls be quiet when you get here as everyone will be sleeping, you can tell them that due to their late arrival, they’ll need to get a hotel for the evening and you will pick them up the following day, you can ask them to change their flight to an earlier arrival, or you can pick them up as they requested. Lots of options. |
Anonymous
| I have relatives who are too cheap to hire an uber, let alone find a hotel. So I don't host them. No, do not pick anyone up. Do not even respond. |
Anonymous
| Your DH doesn't need to make it a confrontation. Why jump right to the dramatics? Your DH has to say no, unfortunately we can't, here's the address and a link to download Uber so you're ready go to when you land. The airport will be chaotic on Wednesday, my brother flew in at 10:30 last year and it took us almost an hour to actually get to him once we entered the airport area. |
Anonymous
|
They are going to wake up the house when they arrive whether you pick them up or not.
It's not necessarily easy to get flights with a bunch of people at a reasonable price these days for a holiday. Do you always seek out reasons to be miffed like this? Personally, I'd just let everyone know that Thanksgiving dinner might be a bit later than normal given the late arrivals on Wednesday. |
Anonymous
| I can see you are already full of resentment and they haven’t even arrived yet. Why host if you do not enjoy the visits? I know it’s too late for this year, but next year, put a stop to this misery. |
Anonymous
I personally do not have a choice. We rotate holidays religiously and this is their "turn". They haven't been here now for 4 yrs because of COVID. I like her and we have fun with them, but she has this inconsiderate streak of behavior. My husband is being a push-over. |
Anonymous
| I would keep it light … “sorry, that’s way past our bedtime these days! Hah! But it’s super easy to Uber or take a cab from DCA. Once you get your luggage just follow the signs to ground transportation/taxi. Looking forward to having you all!” |
Anonymous
| Isn't it normal to pick someone up at the airport? I couldn't imagine not offering. |
Anonymous
|
Depends.
Did you and your H invite them to travel to you? If so, then you have to deal with the inconvenience. After all, they'll be more exhausted than you, having to fly and deal with the headaches that come with that. When we invite my brother's family to visit, we're always conscious of the fact that they graciously agreed to fly to us during a crazy travel time, so we deal with all logistics on the ground and would gladly pick them up. If they invited themselves, well, then it's a whole other kettle of fish entirely. |
Anonymous
| "We can't. On of us will be waiting for you but the rest of the family will already be asleep." |
Anonymous
|
There’s nothing inconsiderate about asking family to pick you up at the airport. It’s extremely common to expect family to pick you up, and to pick them up when they visit you at the airport. For a of families it would be unheard of not to offer.
We routinely send a private car service for family, because the driving conditions around our location airport are a bit hectic (not DC). |
Anonymous
| I don't get it. You still have to be up to let them in the house if they take a cab, right? Why can't someone just pick them up? |
Anonymous
|
You're offended she asked if you could pick her up. And you turn around and say how she'll probably be offended if you suggest a cab. Can you see you're guilty of doing exactly what you predict she will do?
Either pick her up or don't; this really doesen't have to be a thing. |