I just don’t have the stamina for houseguests anymore

[Anonymous]

After a few years of no visitors due to COVID, we’re back to being the family destination for the Fourth because everyone wants to visit for the fireworks, etc. I love my family but I find that I no longer have the stamina, patience, energy or even tolerance for houseguests. [Insert comments about how horrible I am here, and how people will die someday, etc. I know.]

I just no longer want to cook, clean, and play concierge to every visiting relative of mine and of my husband’s, especially when it comes to picky eaters, high-maintenance people, whiny teens, etc. I’ve lost any joy I ever had in hosting, and after the break COVID gave me for holidays, etc., I just don’t know how to get it back.

[Anonymous]

I never had, but I did occasionally, for people I really like.

The problem is that during the pandemic my husband's hoarding has increased, and he uses Covid as an excuse to refuse to tidy up his items spilling out into our main floor areas and have people over.

So unless I want WWIII in the house, I can't have people over.

[Anonymous]

I never had people over. My house is not a hotel. One night, sure, but beyond that, it is a hard no. I will NOT cook for you. I will order you a pizza though. I will not clean upon your arrival but I will tidy up.

[Anonymous]

I feel you on this OP. I’m a person that enjoys hosting but it always took a lot out of me. Since COVID though, it’s just such a huge heavy lift to get my space back in people ready order and I’m just so used to being home and having my own space, that’s it’s hard to go back to not having that. I don’t blame you - sounds like unless you’re unhappy about feeling this way, you’ve found a more authentic self.

[Anonymous]

It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

[Anonymous]

Just be sure to have the tongs out and available for the potato chips!

[Anonymous]

Since COVID the inlaws have stopped staying with us - and it doesn't look like they are going to start again. They stay in a hotel nearby. It has been glorious. I like them, but 6 adult size people in our townhouse was a LOT.

[Anonymous]

I still like hosting people I love, but those who invite themselves? No.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

No. OP is perfectly reasonable. You, on the other hand, sound loony tunes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:After a few years of no visitors due to COVID, we’re back to being the family destination for the Fourth because everyone wants to visit for the fireworks, etc. I love my family but I find that I no longer have the stamina, patience, energy or even tolerance for houseguests. [Insert comments about how horrible I am here, and how people will die someday, etc. I know.]

I just no longer want to cook, clean, and play concierge to every visiting relative of mine and of my husband’s, especially when it comes to picky eaters, high-maintenance people, whiny teens, etc. I’ve lost any joy I ever had in hosting, and after the break COVID gave me for holidays, etc., I just don’t know how to get it back.

What about letting them stay but making it clear they're on their own for entertainment, transportation etc.? As for food, buy some things in bulk, let them know they can help themselves, or order takeout from menus you leave for them. Or ask for a new volunteer to man the grill each night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

No. OP is perfectly reasonable. You, on the other hand, sound loony tunes.

Wrong.

Get a cleaner, order take out, ignore the whiny teenagers, and be done with it. She's not throwing a wedding. This is nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:After a few years of no visitors due to COVID, we’re back to being the family destination for the Fourth because everyone wants to visit for the fireworks, etc. I love my family but I find that I no longer have the stamina, patience, energy or even tolerance for houseguests. [Insert comments about how horrible I am here, and how people will die someday, etc. I know.]

I just no longer want to cook, clean, and play concierge to every visiting relative of mine and of my husband’s, especially when it comes to picky eaters, high-maintenance people, whiny teens, etc. I’ve lost any joy I ever had in hosting, and after the break COVID gave me for holidays, etc., I just don’t know how to get it back.

What about letting them stay but making it clear they're on their own for entertainment, transportation etc.? As for food, buy some things in bulk, let them know they can help themselves, or order takeout from menus you leave for them. Or ask for a new volunteer to man the grill each night.

I laugh whenever I see posts like this. Such a tough girl! There's no way the author would ever talk to family like that in real life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

No. OP is perfectly reasonable. You, on the other hand, sound loony tunes.

Wrong.

Get a cleaner, order take out, ignore the whiny teenagers, and be done with it. She's not throwing a wedding. This is nothing.

Looney tunes troll

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

No. OP is perfectly reasonable. You, on the other hand, sound loony tunes.

Wrong.

Get a cleaner, order take out, ignore the whiny teenagers, and be done with it. She's not throwing a wedding. This is nothing.

You know what, you are an internet bully.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's ok to be selfish and uncaring, OP. And that's what you are. So it works out.

No. OP is perfectly reasonable. You, on the other hand, sound loony tunes.

Wrong.

Get a cleaner, order take out, ignore the whiny teenagers, and be done with it. She's not throwing a wedding. This is nothing.

Looney tunes troll

Why? OP is acting like she has the weight of the world thrust upon her. Most people can only wish they had her problems.