Demi Lovato now they/them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This pronoun fad is going to deliver the White House to a conservative in a few years and it’s tragic. The wound will be totally self-inflicted. Call it attention-seeking or naval-gazing or what you will, but the trans/non-binary trend is turning a lot of social moderates away. Ask parents of middle schoolers how many girls they know who have become trans/non-binary. This is far from just natural variation in gender expression: it’s the hot new thing to do.

As a parent of a middle school girl I fully agree.

This is me. 100% agree with both PPs.

Yes and we are seeing this fad in our middle school too.

Turning them away from what? What politician can control "fads" or craft non-binary policy? If people are that short sighted to see none of this has to do with the white house, I don't know what to tell you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll admit that I don’t understand being non-binary as a 41 yo cisgender woman. I do understand gender stereotypes and how women have been mistreated for centuries. I was honestly asking DH if I could call myself gender fluid or non-binary because I really like to wear pants or shorts and not tuck in my shirt. I also have several personality traits that are advantageous for men, but not for women. Do I just keep getting labelled aggressive or do I just regender myself?

I have a 10 yo daughter and whenever w ego to Target I remind her that when I was her age we didn’t have “boy” and “girl” Legos. You got one giant bucket of primary colors blocks and used your imagination. We did have some gendered toast like Kid Sister and the equivalent but not at all like it is today.

I appreciate that you're just trying to be descriptive but please stop using this term. It is a gender epithet. You can call yourself a woman, a biological woman, but please stop using an epithet.

How is it an epithet? Please define the term and explain why you think it's an insult?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ll admit that I don’t understand being non-binary as a 41 yo cisgender woman. I do understand gender stereotypes and how women have been mistreated for centuries. I was honestly asking DH if I could call myself gender fluid or non-binary because I really like to wear pants or shorts and not tuck in my shirt. I also have several personality traits that are advantageous for men, but not for women. Do I just keep getting labelled aggressive or do I just regender myself?

I have a 10 yo daughter and whenever w ego to Target I remind her that when I was her age we didn’t have “boy” and “girl” Legos. You got one giant bucket of primary colors blocks and used your imagination. We did have some gendered toast like Kid Sister and the equivalent but not at all like it is today.

This is no bash on you as I don't completely get it either but I really hope that labeling oneself as nonbinary is more than just not liking dresses and personality traits. We all have them and many women just aren't "girly". I don't know - I applaud this generation for speaking their truth but I hope it is based on a deep understanding of who they are and not simplistic desires to not conform.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ll admit that I don’t understand being non-binary as a 41 yo cisgender woman. I do understand gender stereotypes and how women have been mistreated for centuries. I was honestly asking DH if I could call myself gender fluid or non-binary because I really like to wear pants or shorts and not tuck in my shirt. I also have several personality traits that are advantageous for men, but not for women. Do I just keep getting labelled aggressive or do I just regender myself?

I have a 10 yo daughter and whenever w ego to Target I remind her that when I was her age we didn’t have “boy” and “girl” Legos. You got one giant bucket of primary colors blocks and used your imagination. We did have some gendered toast like Kid Sister and the equivalent but not at all like it is today.

This is no bash on you as I don't completely get it either but I really hope that labeling oneself as nonbinary is more than just not liking dresses and personality traits. We all have them and many women just aren't "girly". I don't know - I applaud this generation for speaking their truth but I hope it is based on a deep understanding of who they are and not simplistic desires to not conform.

Umm, seriously? Of course it's just a faddish way to nonconform, not a "deep understanding" of who they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This pronoun fad is going to deliver the White House to a conservative in a few years and it’s tragic. The wound will be totally self-inflicted. Call it attention-seeking or naval-gazing or what you will, but the trans/non-binary trend is turning a lot of social moderates away. Ask parents of middle schoolers how many girls they know who have become trans/non-binary. This is far from just natural variation in gender expression: it’s the hot new thing to do.

As a parent of a middle school girl I fully agree.

This is me. 100% agree with both PPs.

+1, mom of DS14 with plenty of friends who identify as NB instead of female.

agree

I agree it seems to really be this odd whirlpool of doing it for attention. I have one niece and one goddaughter who are both in middle school and want to use they and them as pronouns. Their parents comply, and are very hopeful it’s a phase. My daughter is three, and I sincerely hope in another 10 years things have changed so I don’t have to deal with this trend. I’d gladly take the goth trend I put my mother through when I was 12 over this ridiculousness any day.

NP here, and an "elder millennial" that has always felt I straddle the generational divide of Gen Xers (growing up in a pre-internet world) and Millennials.

I vividly remember "trying on identities" when I was a pre-teen/HSer as many people equate the NB movement to (attention seeking, exploratory, hopefully a phase) but why is NB worse than a goth identity? I really clung to the emo culture in HS and depression, self-harm, sadness etc were all glorified. Now as an adult, I see how harmful that identity was to my development and I am working to un-do it. So personally, if my child would rather experiment with more "positive" identity play with NB, body acceptance, radical self love .... that seems better to me than goth/emo.

Why do we have to label it. I agree with a lot of what you wrote and understand not fitting into the stereotypical girl identity but why can't that just be it - we are different, even the girly girls. Why does being different require us to relabel ourselves? I want to still be a woman but sometimes really want a penis, hate dresses, get annoyed by overly emotional women, work in a male field but love doing my hair without labeling myself as something other than a woman.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This pronoun fad is going to deliver the White House to a conservative in a few years and it’s tragic. The wound will be totally self-inflicted. Call it attention-seeking or naval-gazing or what you will, but the trans/non-binary trend is turning a lot of social moderates away. Ask parents of middle schoolers how many girls they know who have become trans/non-binary. This is far from just natural variation in gender expression: it’s the hot new thing to do.

James Carville has been saying the over-the-top wokeness is going to do just that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are so annoying.

It's also none of your business what they call themselves. Their goal is not to please or placate you.

Not only that, but I can't believe how cold and judgmental people are of a person who has struggled with addition and mental illness.

I struggled with math, too. But you don't see me crying about it in the headlines.

I struggled with grammar so using plural pronouns to refer to a single person is troubling. why not use a new word?

It's very difficult to read and follow. You're expecting they/them to be referring to multiple people.

I'm all for whatever pronoun you want, but I agree we need something else that isn't grammatically frustrating!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree it seems to really be this odd whirlpool of doing it for attention. I have one niece and one goddaughter who are both in middle school and want to use they and them as pronouns. Their parents comply, and are very hopeful it’s a phase. My daughter is three, and I sincerely hope in another 10 years things have changed so I don’t have to deal with this trend. I’d gladly take the goth trend I put my mother through when I was 12 over this ridiculousness any day.

NP here, and an "elder millennial" that has always felt I straddle the generational divide of Gen Xers (growing up in a pre-internet world) and Millennials.

I vividly remember "trying on identities" when I was a pre-teen/HSer as many people equate the NB movement to (attention seeking, exploratory, hopefully a phase) but why is NB worse than a goth identity? I really clung to the emo culture in HS and depression, self-harm, sadness etc were all glorified. Now as an adult, I see how harmful that identity was to my development and I am working to un-do it. So personally, if my child would rather experiment with more "positive" identity play with NB, body acceptance, radical self love .... that seems better to me than goth/emo.

Why do we have to label it. I agree with a lot of what you wrote and understand not fitting into the stereotypical girl identity but why can't that just be it - we are different, even the girly girls. Why does being different require us to relabel ourselves? I want to still be a woman but sometimes really want a penis, hate dresses, get annoyed by overly emotional women, work in a male field but love doing my hair without labeling myself as something other than a woman.

Elder Millennial again

But why is the label NB more upsetting to you than the label of "goth," "prep," "stoner," "jock" ... etc. All of those labels were widely used without issue in the 80s and 90s, but it's just a new take on young people finding their identity.

[Anonymous]

She’s so desperate to stay relevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This pronoun fad is going to deliver the White House to a conservative in a few years and it’s tragic. The wound will be totally self-inflicted. Call it attention-seeking or naval-gazing or what you will, but the trans/non-binary trend is turning a lot of social moderates away. Ask parents of middle schoolers how many girls they know who have become trans/non-binary. This is far from just natural variation in gender expression: it’s the hot new thing to do.

James Carville has been saying the over-the-top wokeness is going to do just that.

Yep. I can count on my fingers the number of times I’ve voted for a Republican in the last couple of decades. I feel politically homeless and happy to vote for any non-Trumpian republican that I can find. Many of the democrats have gone way too far around the bend for me. The rational middle is missing these days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree it seems to really be this odd whirlpool of doing it for attention. I have one niece and one goddaughter who are both in middle school and want to use they and them as pronouns. Their parents comply, and are very hopeful it’s a phase. My daughter is three, and I sincerely hope in another 10 years things have changed so I don’t have to deal with this trend. I’d gladly take the goth trend I put my mother through when I was 12 over this ridiculousness any day.

NP here, and an "elder millennial" that has always felt I straddle the generational divide of Gen Xers (growing up in a pre-internet world) and Millennials.

I vividly remember "trying on identities" when I was a pre-teen/HSer as many people equate the NB movement to (attention seeking, exploratory, hopefully a phase) but why is NB worse than a goth identity? I really clung to the emo culture in HS and depression, self-harm, sadness etc were all glorified. Now as an adult, I see how harmful that identity was to my development and I am working to un-do it. So personally, if my child would rather experiment with more "positive" identity play with NB, body acceptance, radical self love .... that seems better to me than goth/emo.

Why do we have to label it. I agree with a lot of what you wrote and understand not fitting into the stereotypical girl identity but why can't that just be it - we are different, even the girly girls. Why does being different require us to relabel ourselves? I want to still be a woman but sometimes really want a penis, hate dresses, get annoyed by overly emotional women, work in a male field but love doing my hair without labeling myself as something other than a woman.

Elder Millennial again

But why is the label NB more upsetting to you than the label of "goth," "prep," "stoner," "jock" ... etc. All of those labels were widely used without issue in the 80s and 90s, but it's just a new take on young people finding their identity.

This version demands changes to the language I use, for one. It’s brought demands to the rest of society that those other labels didn’t. Additionally, the medicalization of the normal identity exploration that occurs during the teenage years is incredibly disturbing and will have ramifications for years to come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This pronoun fad is going to deliver the White House to a conservative in a few years and it’s tragic. The wound will be totally self-inflicted. Call it attention-seeking or naval-gazing or what you will, but the trans/non-binary trend is turning a lot of social moderates away. Ask parents of middle schoolers how many girls they know who have become trans/non-binary. This is far from just natural variation in gender expression: it’s the hot new thing to do.

As a parent of a middle school girl I fully agree.

This is me. 100% agree with both PPs.

Yes and we are seeing this fad in our middle school too.

Turning them away from what? What politician can control "fads" or craft non-binary policy? If people are that short sighted to see none of this has to do with the white house, I don't know what to tell you?

This is why Biden won. He's really not getting into that stuff as much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I agree it seems to really be this odd whirlpool of doing it for attention. I have one niece and one goddaughter who are both in middle school and want to use they and them as pronouns. Their parents comply, and are very hopeful it’s a phase. My daughter is three, and I sincerely hope in another 10 years things have changed so I don’t have to deal with this trend. I’d gladly take the goth trend I put my mother through when I was 12 over this ridiculousness any day.

NP here, and an "elder millennial" that has always felt I straddle the generational divide of Gen Xers (growing up in a pre-internet world) and Millennials.

I vividly remember "trying on identities" when I was a pre-teen/HSer as many people equate the NB movement to (attention seeking, exploratory, hopefully a phase) but why is NB worse than a goth identity? I really clung to the emo culture in HS and depression, self-harm, sadness etc were all glorified. Now as an adult, I see how harmful that identity was to my development and I am working to un-do it. So personally, if my child would rather experiment with more "positive" identity play with NB, body acceptance, radical self love .... that seems better to me than goth/emo.

Why do we have to label it. I agree with a lot of what you wrote and understand not fitting into the stereotypical girl identity but why can't that just be it - we are different, even the girly girls. Why does being different require us to relabel ourselves? I want to still be a woman but sometimes really want a penis, hate dresses, get annoyed by overly emotional women, work in a male field but love doing my hair without labeling myself as something other than a woman.

Elder Millennial again

But why is the label NB more upsetting to you than the label of "goth," "prep," "stoner," "jock" ... etc. All of those labels were widely used without issue in the 80s and 90s, but it's just a new take on young people finding their identity.

This version demands changes to the language I use, for one. It’s brought demands to the rest of society that those other labels didn’t. Additionally, the medicalization of the normal identity exploration that occurs during the teenage years is incredibly disturbing and will have ramifications for years to come.

+1 NP Middle school kids are getting sucked into this via social media—or access to social media via friends—and it sounds fine enough in the beginning, when they think they’re just being super accepting and open-minded. It can spiral fast though, and suddenly girls are looking into binding their chests. And anyone who questions it is automatically transphobic. It’s like they’re brainwashed. Watching a few of my DD’s friends get into this now and just trying desperately to keep my own child grounded in the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well I wish this was coming from somebody a little more emotionally stable, but it will go a ways toward normalizing they then pronouns (it’s only a matter of time, people). Also, good for Demi. I’m sure they know they’ll get a lot of crap for it and that’s know fun to deal with.

Stupidity shouldn't be normalized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ugh. This trend bothers me so much on behalf of actual trans people who feel they were born the wrong sex. Is Demi aware that you can be gay and dress masculine and still be she/her? Does she know that to be a “woman” you don’t have to wear dresses and be 100% feminine? Most women aren’t like that anyway. There is such a misogynistic bent to this behavior, it disgusts me.

+1000

When will this insanity end?