Things women get hung up on that don't actually matter to men

[Anonymous]

Things I thought mattered but don't: glasses vs. contacts, the last 10 lbs, makeup and hair.

Things that he does find attractive on me: wearing low cut shirts or tight clothes (no matter what shape I'm in), sex as much as possible, being sweaty from exercise or exercising around him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Things I thought mattered but don't: glasses vs. contacts, the last 10 lbs, makeup and hair.

Things that he does find attractive on me: wearing low cut shirts or tight clothes (no matter what shape I'm in), sex as much as possible, being sweaty from exercise or exercising around him.

Sounds about right.

[Anonymous]

Shaving down below... I prefer a full bush.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Most men (high earners in particular) don't care what a woman's job title is, how much she earns, or what she owns. They care that she is attractive and in good physical shape, has a nice, pleasant personality and would make a great mother. Full stop, that's the full list.

That's why professional women are always so confused when the high-status, handsome man they were pursuing goes for the pretty, easy-going barista/daycare worker who loves kids.

This isn't happening. Successful men are more likely to marry successful women. Marriage is becoming a thing for the affluent and elite, people are not crossing socio-economic classes to marry. It's called assortative mating.

Call it whatever you want but they’re still sleeping with and leaving their “successful women” partners for the ones who prioritize his needs over their own “success” in career.

Are they? I'm not seeing this in my circle at all. Sounds like wishful thinking hoping a Prince Charming is going to sweep you off our feet ala Richard Gere in Pretty Woman. That's not reality.

I think its happening but not in the way an UC or UMC goes and marries a working class girl.

An UMC educated investment banking professional guy marries an UMC educated high school teacher, or artist or comms girl.

But that's a far cry from the pretty barista, day care worker/nanny scenario PP thinks is happening.

if the barista has a degree from Smith or the daycare worker is figuring out if they want to go to grad school after graduating Colby it could happen. No associate grinding out billable hours is going to marry the high school drop out serving them drinks, but the bartender working nights while finishing a master in fine art is another story

I see this all the time.

The UMC Banking professional always marries a pretty, feminine, artsy woman. She becomes a SAHM, paints, and becomes an insta influencer. Some were working in Law beforehand but always quit.

They also marry: school teachers, PR girls, models, artists and interior designers.

Many of these girls may work for fun at a cute boutique selling clothes or a cute non profit job before marriage.


Only middle class men other women who work 9-5

So true.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Most men (high earners in particular) don't care what a woman's job title is, how much she earns, or what she owns. They care that she is attractive and in good physical shape, has a nice, pleasant personality and would make a great mother. Full stop, that's the full list.

That's why professional women are always so confused when the high-status, handsome man they were pursuing goes for the pretty, easy-going barista/daycare worker who loves kids.

This isn't happening. Successful men are more likely to marry successful women. Marriage is becoming a thing for the affluent and elite, people are not crossing socio-economic classes to marry. It's called assortative mating.

Okay, how about the low-paid teacher at an elite private elementary school? She comes from an UMC family and presents well, but she is passionate about kids.

Statistically those women, as a group, marry men with similar incomes. I am sure there are exceptions.

What men want and what men marry are two entirely different things. Men are often strategic. The upside to marrying the barista doesn't work strategically. But I guarantee most would rather sleep with the barista than their spouse.

Men also want their wives to eat fried chicken and drink beer with them while watching football but still look like the model next door.

No one gives a f you can’t wrap yourself pathetic head around the fact professional women don’t care what you think. Our spouse is absolutely free to leave for a barista without making a dent on my lifestyle anytime if the year. I bet the barista doesn’t even bat an eye at you as she rolls off with her handsome barista boyfriend who last longer than whiny professional men in bed.

Why so much anger and rage here? Different PP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Right, because women are the ultimate arbiters of what matters. Why should men feel bad about not caring about something just because women have overblown its importance? Why is everything done to cater to a woman's vanity.

FIFY

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've been married 24 years. Things I cared about and thought would make me a more attractive person to my husband, but don't: shaving my legs before sex, wearing contacts instead of glasses, running a highly efficient household so we both have time to relax, volunteering, activities I do to stay mentally sharp and engaged in the world.

Things that matter to him that I didn't realize: he won't have sex if he's irritated with me and won't do makeup sex after a fight; he's much more into me wearing lingerie than our actual activities in bed; he has no problem ignoring me for three hours straight and then saying, let's go get into bed.

What did he do to ensure that the household was running highly efficiently?

Let me guess... you didn't work outside the home.

My husband actually cared that I did work outside the home, and he also cooked and took care of the children and house. He wanted a life partner, and as did I.

We are in our 50s.