Curious... it it important to you to be in the popular mom clique?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m curious if people aspire to this and why?

No, I don't want to be part of it because most seem (a) to have been mean girls who never grew out of it, (b) unhappy with themselves, their marriages, their kids, etc. (c) a bit silly and preoccupied with things lacking substance, and (d) I have my own friends. I smile and say "hi" to everyone, but don't need to be friends with everyone hanging out gossiping about each other, teachers, the school, the kids, their husbands, etc. K

[Anonymous]

Soccer top team parents are very similar.

[Anonymous]

I'm not sure there is one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

We had a single mon friend/neighbor who wanted DH to help with her honey-do list. It was obnoxious, as he has his hands full with our needs. We pulled back hard.

[Anonymous]

Those people aren’t usually actually popular, more like self important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

We had a single mon friend/neighbor who wanted DH to help with her honey-do list. It was obnoxious, as he has his hands full with our needs. We pulled back hard.

I rest my case. PP would it have been so terrible to help your friend out?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

In my case it’s not that I don’t want to hang out with them, but their reality is so different from my own, so I don’t have much in common with them. For the most part their lives are stressful, harried, somewhat unstable. I feel bad telling them about my vacations and purchases because they can’t afford them and don’t have a spouse to vacation with and generally share the burden of daily life. So I’d rather talk to my married friends who have stable lives because then it’s not like I’m bragging or showing off.

[Anonymous]

^ Also their children usually have some sort of behavioral issues due to the extreme stress of divorce that they’ve been put through. So I don’t like talking about my children with them because it might make them feel bad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

We had a single mon friend/neighbor who wanted DH to help with her honey-do list. It was obnoxious, as he has his hands full with our needs. We pulled back hard.

When I was the divorced mom in my neighborhood, the husbands approached me to offer their help. I never once asked them first and I only accepted if it was something quick and easy that I just lacked the strength or height to do. Everything else, I hired the neighborhood handyman to do or a group of teen boys who ran a lawn care service. But the neighbor wives were so obviously terrified I was a temptress with my two kids and thrift store purchased teacher’s wardrobe. They weren’t friendly again until eight years later when I had a boyfriend they knew about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

In my case it’s not that I don’t want to hang out with them, but their reality is so different from my own, so I don’t have much in common with them. For the most part their lives are stressful, harried, somewhat unstable. I feel bad telling them about my vacations and purchases because they can’t afford them and don’t have a spouse to vacation with and generally share the burden of daily life. So I’d rather talk to my married friends who have stable lives because then it’s not like I’m bragging or showing off.

Damn, this was one of the rudest things I have read in a long time!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

We had a single mon friend/neighbor who wanted DH to help with her honey-do list. It was obnoxious, as he has his hands full with our needs. We pulled back hard.

I rest my case. PP would it have been so terrible to help your friend out?

PP can just send her to your house. You are willing and have plenty of time on your hands so sounds like a reasonable solution. Do you mind posting your email so we can set this up? TIA!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

I’m married and I like the single moms at my school better and hang out with them more. Not because of their marital status, just 3 of them are awesome. Also, they have more time to hang out because they are child-free 50% of the time!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's not important to me, but sometimes I do feel jealous of women who have these close mom tribes. I do know a lot of moms from our school and I do have friends among them, but I'm a single mom and the "cool" moms are all married, so I think that's a factor. The single mom thing can be foreign/ threatening to groups of married moms, I think.

I don't know why you think that. We have a single mom in our "mom tribe" as you called it. Why do you think someone would feel threatened? Because you're going to steal their husband? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Sorry, but married moms not wanting to hang out with single moms is definitely a thing.

In my case it’s not that I don’t want to hang out with them, but their reality is so different from my own, so I don’t have much in common with them. For the most part their lives are stressful, harried, somewhat unstable. I feel bad telling them about my vacations and purchases because they can’t afford them and don’t have a spouse to vacation with and generally share the burden of daily life. So I’d rather talk to my married friends who have stable lives because then it’s not like I’m bragging or showing off.

You're so funny. I'm middle class, middle-aged and married and I see divorce and separations among my wider acquaintances as well as one sudden death. I was shocked to find out about abuse in some situations and affairs in others when they projected such a picture-perfect exterior. I'm sympathetic to single parents. Circumstances could make me one some day.

[Anonymous]

Why is this posted in parenting? Please move this post to the teens forum where it belongs.