How much do you pay for in-home care for an infant?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For the record, I haven't called anyone here a bad parent and I can't recall anyone else doing so either, maybe I missed it. Perharps the reason that the PP hasn't seen any of the behaviors at her provider's home is because her provider, like myself and countless other providers I know, don't discuss financial or any other type of gripes with other families. I simply don't discuss other familie's business with the other daycare families. And also "you people"? What are you trying to say?

Janet

You sound like a reasonable person and I applaud your policy of respecting the privacy of your families. But other posters have said very negative things about parents, and I mean "Parents" with a capital "P".

Unfortunately, my personal experience with an in-home provider was not as positive. She blabbed to all of us about the other families. It made me uncomfortable (and eventually we left). I'm not saying all do, but I'm saying that not all in-home providers are all that they should be, in the same way that not all parents are all that they should be, and that not all people are all that they should be.

Many of the behaviors of "bad parents" are recognizable by other parents, even if the provider does not disclose it. When you are in an in-home situation, you see enough. At least that was my experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
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Excuse me? If you are getting paid for 50 hours what the hell do you care how many hours I am at work? Maybe I am trying to do other things, like clean my house, do wash, go grocery shopping or one of the other million things I have to do. You don't have the right to dictate how I use my time while I am paying you to watch my child. Oh, and you are right, I can honestly say I have NEVER done any of the things you outlined. You really need to get a better screening process, or learn to speak up. If it sucks so much to be you, then go out and get a job that you don't have to deal with anyone. Because trust me, in the working world you are ALWAYS going to encounter and asshole or two (or five). But do I start a blog so all the working moms of the world can share in my bitterness? Nope. I simply do my job and collect my paycheck and chalk it up to the fact that there are all different kinds of people out there - some are nice, some are not, such is life!



Hmmm, perhaps you didn't read my entire very lenghtly post. I have only long term families, I learned to sort out the bad apples years ago. As for leaving your child in daycare for an additional 30 hours a week in order to run errands...well, you are right, it is certainly your right. It is simply my opinion that children need their parents and leaving them in daycare so as to make your grocery shopping less of a hassle is selfish.

I do want to clarify that I don't think and extra day, 8 - 10 hours of care, is a bad thing, it is only when we start taking about 20 to 30 hours per week that I have an issue with...

I agree, I don't think it's right either, and I don't do it. Just last night I got off of work early, and rather than leave my kid at daycare, I picked him up early and took him to the store with me. My provider even said "leave him here, go shop in peace and quiet", but I took him with me. My point was it's none of your business what a person does with their time if you are being paid accordingly. Yes, there are plenty of parents out there that leave their kid in daycare as long as possible. I am not one of them, and I don't appreciate being lumped into one category, as seems to be happening with the providers that are posting here. We all aren't bad, horrible parents, looking for whatever way we can dump our kids!

[Anonymous]

"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree, I don't think it's right either, and I don't do it. Just last night I got off of work early, and rather than leave my kid at daycare, I picked him up early and took him to the store with me. My provider even said "leave him here, go shop in peace and quiet", but I took him with me. My point was it's none of your business what a person does with their time if you are being paid accordingly. Yes, there are plenty of parents out there that leave their kid in daycare as long as possible. I am not one of them, and I don't appreciate being lumped into one category, as seems to be happening with the providers that are posting here. We all aren't bad, horrible parents, looking for whatever way we can dump our kids!

Yes, this is what I have been trying to say!

I am directly my posts very specifically ONLY at the daycare providers who are posting here, not generalizing about all in-home providers (of whom I am sure there are many great, dedicated individuals who deserve more thanks than they ever get). But several of the providers posting here, including Judy, are generalizing about parents in a way that is unfair.

[Anonymous]

"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.

Really? My MIL uses it all the time - never once has she used it to refer to anyone in a rude and condescending way. Bizarre.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.

I am one of the people arguing on the side of the parents, and, I have to say, I agree with that. It's not nice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have to say the difference here is that I said, "MOST of you wouldn't last week" as opposed to "ALL in-home providers..."

See, most versus all...

Although I do think it is interesting that you included yourself in the "most" category since you said that you don't do anything that I listed. If you dn't do those things, then you wouldn't have been included in that category, now would you?

Duh...I was not lumping myself in the "most". I was saying that they way you and others have written your posts suggests that anyone who disagrees with you must be one of the horrible parents, one of the "most". And since I have not done the things you describe, but I still disagree with you, then your logic is flawed. Following me now? Do ya get it?

It does not matter that you said "most' and not "all". The tone of that remark was snarky and rude, clearly meant to be insulting, and it was a stupid remark that made no sense in the same way my "all" example makes no sense. Do you understand now?

Let me make this more clear for you...

Having read the posts here, MOST of the parents posting here are more concerned with money than care. That said, MOST of the parents here would not be a good fit for my program.

Do YOU understand now?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.

Here's a whole thread accusing most, if not all, daycare parents as neglectful, selfish, greedy, and all around sh*tty, but this is bothering you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I agree, I don't think it's right either, and I don't do it. Just last night I got off of work early, and rather than leave my kid at daycare, I picked him up early and took him to the store with me. My provider even said "leave him here, go shop in peace and quiet", but I took him with me. My point was it's none of your business what a person does with their time if you are being paid accordingly. Yes, there are plenty of parents out there that leave their kid in daycare as long as possible. I am not one of them, and I don't appreciate being lumped into one category, as seems to be happening with the providers that are posting here. We all aren't bad, horrible parents, looking for whatever way we can dump our kids!


Yes, this is what I have been trying to say!

I am directly my posts very specifically ONLY at the daycare providers who are posting here, not generalizing about all in-home providers (of whom I am sure there are many great, dedicated individuals who deserve more thanks than they ever get). But several of the providers posting here, including Judy, are generalizing about parents in a way that is unfair.

16:01 here - exactly my point! I LIKE spending time with my child - I rush to get him as fast as I can when I leave work. On weekends my husband begs me to go and take time for myself, but I don't want to! I want to be with my baby! I think the providers that are posting here are really disgusting - like we just dump our kids and skip to work every day. Give me a break - it rips my heart out, but I HAVE to do it - not because I am shirking my responsibilities. Why the hell would I have had a kid if I just wanted to dump him off at daycare?

[Anonymous]

Let me make this more clear for you...

Having read the posts here, MOST of the parents posting here are more concerned with money than care. That said, MOST of the parents here would not be a good fit for my program.

Do YOU understand now?

Really?!? I don't get that at all! Am I reading the same thread??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Let me make this more clear for you...

Having read the posts here, MOST of the parents posting here are more concerned with money than care. That said, MOST of the parents here would not be a good fit for my program.

Do YOU understand now?

I understand perfectly that you just don't get it. If that is what you come away with from reading the entire thread, then you need a course in reading comprehension. There were one or two posts at the beginning of this thread where one *might* be able to argue that interpretation, but since then it has been parents talking about anything but money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:16:01 here - exactly my point! I LIKE spending time with my child - I rush to get him as fast as I can when I leave work. On weekends my husband begs me to go and take time for myself, but I don't want to! I want to be with my baby! I think the providers that are posting here are really disgusting - like we just dump our kids and skip to work every day. Give me a break - it rips my heart out, but I HAVE to do it - not because I am shirking my responsibilities. Why the hell would I have had a kid if I just wanted to dump him off at daycare?

16:04 back again. Yes, me, too. Whenever I can take time away from work to be with my daughter, I do. Whenever I can help out at her daycare, I do. My mom keeps telling me to go out and take time for myself, but I'm with you; being with my daughter is absolutely the best time of my day. That is why the providers who are bagging on parents so indiscriminantly is making me so annoyed. How dare they assume they know what all parents are like or what motivates a given parent for having their child in care?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Let me make this more clear for you...

Having read the posts here, MOST of the parents posting here are more concerned with money than care. That said, MOST of the parents here would not be a good fit for my program.

Do YOU understand now?

I understand perfectly that you just don't get it. If that is what you come away with from reading the entire thread, then you need a course in reading comprehension. There were one or two posts at the beginning of this thread where one *might* be able to argue that interpretation, but since then it has been parents talking about anything but money.

This, and also - not many parents have the luxury of not thinking about cost. Of course quality of care is most important, but that doesn't mean we can ignore the price tag. I have to balance the two, and I suspect most parents are in that boat with me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.


Here's a whole thread accusing most, if not all, daycare parents as neglectful, selfish, greedy, and all around sh*tty, but this is bothering you?

Yeah, "you people" is the end of the world. It's OK to call all parents horrible people that crap all over their providers. It's the "you people" that got that poster's panties in a bunch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
"You people" is rude and condescending. I don't know why anyone wouldn't take issue with that.


Here's a whole thread accusing most, if not all, daycare parents as neglectful, selfish, greedy, and all around sh*tty, but this is bothering you?

Yeah, "you people" is the end of the world. It's OK to call all parents horrible people that crap all over their providers. It's the "you people" that got that poster's panties in a bunch.

They are grasping at straws to try and justify their nastiness.