Would you be mad?

[Anonymous]

I think situations like OP's and similar ones others post about are really hard to comprehend unless you come from dysfunctional families. When you get sucked into this dynamic, especially if you're raised that way and it's all you know, it can be very hard to break free.

I'm sorry you're in this situation OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not be mad if I were you. It's one day that he planned with his dad. You should have gotten groceries prior to the day and 10 minutes is walking distance. There are plenty of things that could have been done to avoid this. You sound jealous, obviously there's more to the story. How come you don't plan dates, or family outings? Why does it fall on your husband? You sound needy. Do you have friends or family to hang out with?

Agree. I wouldn't begrudge him a close tie with his family. I don't understand people who expect someone to choose their spouse and kids over their parents, rather than an equally connected relationship. Then the spouse divorces you or cheats on you and you have no family connection to support you. No.

You know that Sunday's are usually spent with his family, don't sit around moping and waiting until all the food has run out so you can call him in tears and create a scene. Saturday you should have bought groceries or better still tell him to get groceries since he'll be out with the car next day. On the day he's with family, you plan something fun for yourself and DD and on a different day leave DD with him while you spend time with a friend or doing whatever you enjoy. There are 6 other days in the week for you to see each other, just work around this Sunday plan. Or plan to divorce. Those are your choices. Counseling won't solve this.

My personal belief is that the family you create should always come first. I'm a Christian and it's in my beliefs. "Blood is thicker than water" meaning the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. You leave and cleave your family of origin and become one with your wife. DH believes this as well. He's struggled lately and not opened up until yesterday. His dad has just been putting a lot on him and it's really gotten to him and he hasn't been putting DD and I first. We're doing ok now. We decided to take some time away from his family and really focus on spending time as a family unit.

Must be nice to have it all magically squared away now after 6 years of marriage and it only took the one talk. Congrats!

[Anonymous]

Would not bother me that he is spending time with his dad. I married into that family and I knew they were close before I married him.

I WOULD be livid about leaving me stranded without a vehicle and the truck is just parked at their house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not be mad if I were you. It's one day that he planned with his dad. You should have gotten groceries prior to the day and 10 minutes is walking distance. There are plenty of things that could have been done to avoid this. You sound jealous, obviously there's more to the story. How come you don't plan dates, or family outings? Why does it fall on your husband? You sound needy. Do you have friends or family to hang out with?

Agree. I wouldn't begrudge him a close tie with his family. I don't understand people who expect someone to choose their spouse and kids over their parents, rather than an equally connected relationship. Then the spouse divorces you or cheats on you and you have no family connection to support you. No.

You know that Sunday's are usually spent with his family, don't sit around moping and waiting until all the food has run out so you can call him in tears and create a scene. Saturday you should have bought groceries or better still tell him to get groceries since he'll be out with the car next day. On the day he's with family, you plan something fun for yourself and DD and on a different day leave DD with him while you spend time with a friend or doing whatever you enjoy. There are 6 other days in the week for you to see each other, just work around this Sunday plan. Or plan to divorce. Those are your choices. Counseling won't solve this.

My personal belief is that the family you create should always come first. I'm a Christian and it's in my beliefs. "Blood is thicker than water" meaning the blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb. You leave and cleave your family of origin and become one with your wife. DH believes this as well. He's struggled lately and not opened up until yesterday. His dad has just been putting a lot on him and it's really gotten to him and he hasn't been putting DD and I first. We're doing ok now. We decided to take some time away from his family and really focus on spending time as a family unit.

Must be nice to have it all magically squared away now after 6 years of marriage and it only took the one talk. Congrats!

No it isn't all squared away. It's headed in the right direction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What hurts is he's still fishing.

Because you're having a nuclear meltdown over groceries.

Yes, it's all about the groceries.

It's always about more than just groceries with women. It's always a noble cause. There's always a reason she's being a martyr and you're being an a-hole.