Please share funny/terrible neighbor stories

[Anonymous]

One afternoon, I walked out of my house to take a walk. As I was going up the street, I heard "Mama!" "Mama!". My kids were at a neighbor's, but you all know a mom can't ignore that. I turned around and saw a toddler (maybe 18 mths?) walking up the middle of the street, no adult in sight. I immediately went over to him and took him over to the sidewalk and tried to ask him where his house was as I didn't recognize him as one of the neighborhood kids. He, of course, being a baby couldn't tell me. I walked him a bit down the street and didn't see anyone looking for him. Just as I was about to call 911, an older woman comes running down the street. I asked her if he was her's and she said she was his grandmother and he'd been playing out front (WTF?). She whisked him away muttering "my daughter would kill me". No thanks for finding him or anything, but whatever...

A couple of weeks later, I read about a woman with an address on my street being arrested for DWI, with an open container, and causing a 4 car accident at 4pm on a weekday. Turns out, it was Granny. I assume she was busy knocking back a few while she was supposed to be watching the baby. Scary for the little dude.

[Anonymous]

Did your neighbors move exactly above me? They run a Roomba at night and on the weekends just as you described 🙄

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had an upstairs neighbor who would run the roomba at midnight. On weekdays. I can't even tell you how angry it made me to be awakened out of a dead sleep by a roomba.

My upstairs neighbors are most likely mentally unwell. Here is a typical vacuuming schedule for them: 10:00 PM, start vacuuming for the day for approx 1 hr. 11:30 PM vacuuming again for about 30 minutes. 1:00 AM vacuuming again for an hour.

These people are constantly vacuuming, very late at night and multiple times a week.

OP back, I love all these. Pp, your upstairs vacuuming neighbor has likely been diagnosed with Acute Toddleritis. Symptoms include constant broken glass / dishes and suspicious-looking messes on the floor at all hours.

[Anonymous]

We were a young couple with a baby and bought next door to the Crazy, Angry, Single Lady with 2 Show Dogs. We tried to be friendly and keep to ourselves.

DH was spraying Round Up on some weeds growing up onto a cinderblock wall in our yard and CASLw2SD wanted him to cease until she could personally read the ingredients. She claimed that particles could land on her backyard lawn where her showdogs and an and played. DH obliged her.

Next, CASLw2SD knocked on our door one Sunday evening, like 7:30ish. DH was out for his usual basketball game. Neighbor asked if DH could help her with something - maybe lifting something? I answered the door holding my baby and explained DH was out playing basketball, could uldnt help. She responded by saying, "Basketball? On a Sunday night? What a fool believes!"

Another time, a limb from our tree fell across her front yard during a storm.
She called the police. The police officer apologized when I answered the door.

Then, we put our house on the market. The war began. She put up NO Trespassing signs. We sold to a builder, she put up larger Save My Trees signs and began sending us registered mail. I refused to sign and sent them all back. She'd regularly walk across the street, cross her arms and stare at our house, hoping we'd see her.

[Anonymous]

We lived in an apt in LA and the woman downstairs had a broom she would bang on the ceiling all times of the day and night.

My kid dropped an iPad and she banged - 3 in the afternoon
My other kid threw up in the night and she literally banged on the ceiling under the bathroom he was puking in.

When we moved out a couple of lawyers with a baby moved into our apt. Broom witch downstairs was gone in 6 months.

[Anonymous]

18:03. Our neighborhood was a mix of old and new with tear downs. Crazy neighbor lady screamed at anyone who parked in front of her house (public street). She confronted a construction worker and demanded he return and replace the gravel that his truck displaced. Her car's window got a rock thrown through it that night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:During a power outage my very drunk neighbor tried to come into our house. My husband let her in!!!! She came in and talked to both of us for a few minutes. Just when I was trying to figure out how to get her to leave the power came back on and she realized it was the wrong house. We never talked about it again with her. Don't have a lot of respect for her now.

You are so boring!

[Anonymous]

I am FASCINATED by this thread, and thankful none of these things have happened to me.

[Anonymous]

Next door neighbors moved in and a few days later had our fence removed because they wanted a view of our pretty back yard. I had fence re-installed and lined it with bird feeders. That part of the fence is in a part if our yard we don’t see but it birders their patio. She has been composing for 10 years about birds shi**ing on her patio.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had a bunch of frat bro/investment banker types renting the townhouse beside ours when our kids were small. They would go out on weekend nights and close down the bar, then show up with ALLLL their friends at 2:30 AM to continue the party. They'd go out on the deck just outside our baby's room, drink, smoke pot, get into obnoxious yelling matches, and piss off the balcony into our yard. A couple of times I went over there and nicely asked them to keep it down since it was 3AM and our baby was sleeping, but it was no use. Finally, DH called the cops on them, and they threw their bags of pot into our yard. I was so tempted to steal it and keep it for myself, and I've never even smoked pot. It was just the principle of the thing.

In the neighborhood I grew up in, there was a guy would would stand stark naked in his front window with all the interior lights on to watch the sunrise every morning. If you were on your way to work or going for a jog, you got to see the show.

Caught a glimpse of our neighbor last week. Similar situation. Really surprised to see that he apparently shaves off all his body hair. Ewww.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Did your neighbors move exactly above me? They run a Roomba at night and on the weekends just as you described 🙄

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had an upstairs neighbor who would run the roomba at midnight. On weekdays. I can't even tell you how angry it made me to be awakened out of a dead sleep by a roomba.

My upstairs neighbors are most likely mentally unwell. Here is a typical vacuuming schedule for them: 10:00 PM, start vacuuming for the day for approx 1 hr. 11:30 PM vacuuming again for about 30 minutes. 1:00 AM vacuuming again for an hour.

These people are constantly vacuuming, very late at night and multiple times a week.

OP back, I love all these. Pp, your upstairs vacuuming neighbor has likely been diagnosed with Acute Toddleritis. Symptoms include constant broken glass / dishes and suspicious-looking messes on the floor at all hours.

We vacuumed all the time when we had a newborn. The noise was the only thing that soothed him. Realizing now that we probably annoyed the neighbors and they thought we were insane.

[Anonymous]

When I was in high school, we lived in an apartment building. The next door neighbor had broken up with his girlfriend Mandy and would sing the Barry Manilow song "Mandy" all hours of the day and night on the terrace at the top of his lungs, usually very drunk. We never called the cops on him or reported him because we all felt sorry for him. We just got used to it. Sometimes we would sing along. I used to get very bad period cramps and migraines but laughing at Mandy blaring from the terrace usually made me feel better. I still sing this song on karaoke nights but not with the fire and passion that my neighbor had. I still think of him now and then and hope he found happiness.

Neighbor man from the 1980s - this is for you.

(I hope you don't still sing this song and found another girlfriend.)

Excerpt from Mandy by Barry Manilow:

Oh Mandy
Well you came and you gave without taking
But I sent you away
Oh Mandy
Well you kissed me and stopped me from shaking
And I need you today
Oh Mandy

[Anonymous]

My male neighbor seduced my BF. We had been together for four years after college. I was devastated bc we were on the path to getting engaged.

[Anonymous]

My hot headed neighbor over a tree branch while I was at work threatened to murder my nine month pregnant wife on my front lawn.

Only thing he is as scared of was his wife. So my wife went straight to his house rang the doorbell and told wife.

She said you need to apologize as not right to threaten to murder women while they are pregnant. He apologized.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was a kid, we had a busybody neighbor who would call my mom and report on what we were doing in the yard, or even what we were doing in the house. One day she called and said my sister and I were jumping on the bed. We weren't-- we were sitting on the top bunk!

My mom was an attentive SAHM, but this neighbor seemed to think she needed parenting assistance. "Gladys Kravitz" had her own kids, but apparently would rather stalk us than pay attention to them.

Haha, when we were kids, like under 10, my sister and I used to climb onto the roof of our three story house, and sit on the peak of the roof (it was SO dangerous, in hindsight!). We always went out when it was dark (we shared a room, and had access to the roof through our window). Once, we went out during the day, and as we were climbing back inside, we heard our mom pounding up the stairs. Our neighbor had seen us up on the roof and immediately called my mom.

My sister now lives in that house, and we are both horrified at the thought of her kids doing what we did. If we had fallen, it would have been instant death, falling 45 feet onto concrete. Thank god for that neighbor- she probably saved one of our lives!

[Anonymous]

New guy moved into the apartment below us. Late 20s. Clean cut. Wore business casual clothing. Except sometimes he was SUPER nice and sometimes he was super rude. You never knew. When he was rude he’d get in his black Nissan sedan and squeal out of the parking lot. Jekyll and Hyde. Weird. I saw him regularly, almost daily sometimes twice a day. Never knew if I’d see Jekyll or Hyde.

Until about a year after he had been living below me and I saw Jekyll AND Hyde TOGETHER! They were identical twins. And they had identical black Nissan sedans but only one parking space so one parked in the lot and one on the street and did first come first serve. And they seemed to dress basically exactly alike. Also one was an ass and one was super friendly.

They moved not long after I found out there were two. I just thought it was odd, two grown men still living together and such similar lives.